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Name: MadMom
[ Original Post ]
My son is twelve years old. He is particulary active - perhaps you might say hyperactive -and has some problems concentrating. The teachers at his school really seem to hate him though. IThey are constantly making him stand outside in the hall, or are giving him detention. I'm having him tested for ADHD, but this is not enough for them. They want to move him to another school, but I think this is just to make their own lives better. Anyone else facing these problems?
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Name: Shocked | Date: Jun 16th, 2005 8:46 PM
Can teachers do that? Force a child out of school? Isn't that against what they stand for? What is this world coming to? 

Name: Leah | Date: Jun 19th, 2005 8:20 PM
Shocked - you betcha Teachers will do all they can in a passive-aggressive way to get a kid out of their hair. Stupid though, because if they cooperated with the testing and really worked to find the problem, they'd spend so much less effort than constantly correcting (punishing) his behavior which he likely doesn't have much control over.

MadMom - Pull out all the stops and get your kid tested for everything under the sun. Make the school do this (they're required to) as his behaviour is impeding his (and possibly others) learning. It may not be ADHD, but rather a learning disability or sensory integration thing that's making school tough for him. How is he at home? Can he go to a movie, the store, the mall, to a busy and fun place without going bananas? Consider how well he does in these areas as all are high-sensory areas outside of the school. And remember - your son has a right to a Least Restrictive Placement (usually his home school) for his education.

But maybe the current school and all the "trouble" he's been in at this school, plus the possbility that he is being ostracized by his peers are just making matters worse and a fresh start somewhere else may be what he needs. 

Name: Spud | Date: Jun 21st, 2005 12:23 AM
I have a 12 year old son who was kicked out of school due to ADHD, OCD, ODD and control issues they can kick them out and they do all the time.
Your son has to want to change the way he is acting so you can only guide him. Look into P.A.N.D.A.'s too!!! 

Name: missy | Date: Jul 15th, 2005 8:16 PM
I have 5 year old twins sons with adhd they go to a wonderfull school.The school had talked to me about moving them to another school that is better able to meet there needs.In my experience I would call around and find out the school in my county that has the teachers and counslers that can handle him better.
My boys will be changing schools this year to one that is able to help them better for there age. 

Name: skilark | Date: Jul 27th, 2005 5:29 AM
I have an 11 year old son with adhd, I'm not having a big problem with the teacher yet but with other children in his class. He doesn't have alot of friends. It seems that no one wants to play with him. This really hurts his self esteam. Any suggests I can give him. 

Name: Taralyn | Date: Jul 28th, 2005 4:26 AM
I would recommend that you have him tested for learning disabilities to identify if he qualifies for special education programs. Get him on an IEP and the school will have no choice but to work with him and provide him with the education he's entitled to. 


Name: TANYA | Date: Aug 3rd, 2005 1:12 AM
I have the same problem.My family are the ones who don't like my son.I know how much it hurts, When you know you have done every thing you can.What people don't know is that you live with your child every day and his ADHD. 

Name: Michelle | Date: Aug 22nd, 2005 6:29 AM
Hi ya I have the same problem my 9 yr old daughter is the same the school put her outside constantly but where is there right to an education, medication is all the schools want like you said to make thier lives easier, my daughter hasnt many friends which is hard as we have just moved here from the uk and all the kids near us either dont like her or there IGNORANT parents who know nothing of ADHD wont let there children play with her she gets excitable but not to over the top and is very polite and well mannered but acts before thinking and although i could quite happy kill her at times, the schools should have more understanding and sympathy but with them it comes down to whatever is easier for them, but keep ya chin up and keep on fighting for him your child has every right to stay at that school and they should provide help to do that 

Name: boogie | Date: Sep 1st, 2005 10:26 AM
Too many teachers these day are too quick to call a child ADHD because they can not handle the child or class. Sending him in the hall is the wrong way to handle the situation. They need the accertiveness home and school all count. He needs to stay in class and given extra work if not cooperating with the class as a whole. Maybe at some point the parent setting in on some of the classes of the child. This is helps to inform you of what may be causing the problem. Usually a friend they like to talk to or play with. Get them moved away from them this is the problem. Usually they like to make noises or imitate something and they like to get the approval of the other classmates. The one's that laugh are the one's that feed his need to continue, more than likely those kids are just as disurptive as him, but he is found the source because he is egged on. Talk to the teacher and find out if he has really, really tried to talk to the child instead of punishing him. Punishing him in front of the children that expect him to act up only cause him to continue for the others expect him to obtain the same consiquences each day. Talk to the principal and see what can be resolved instead of pulling him out of class. He will not receive his education this way. It sounds like he has a teacher that can not handle the challange. Teachers, teach because they want to not because they are forsed to do so. Teaching is a challange not a job! email me [email protected] 

Name: Ruth | Date: Sep 2nd, 2005 3:27 AM
They sure do try? My son was ADHD since age 3, he threw chairs at the other kids in pre-school. I even took my son out and tried to home school him, I got him in a differnet school this year and at least there trying to help] My son is almost 15 and i having a very hard time getting the schools to understand that he has a promblem. 

Name: tracy | Date: Sep 3rd, 2005 2:31 AM
my son has the same problem he's nine now and he's been in the same school for going on for 4 years now even though we moved out of the arrear I chose to keep in the same school for alot of reasons. The main one being is they know him, in the beginning it was hard I really wanted to change schools because he had been labeled as the bad kid and he would never get a fair chance, but I realized it would be the same anywhere he went, so I battled it out, I work with his teacher he has a counseler, he used to go to a special after school program( wich he graduated from this year). Over the years I discoverd thar best teachers are the ones that have been teaching along time, or the the ones that are verry structured. If the school has more than 1 teacher for each grade meet each one towards the end of the year, find what they know about ADHD, if they know your child if they dont't introduce them see how they react to each other, I 've done that and it seems to help. This year when school started his teacher was ready for him my sons desk was close to her desk with his chair close by (he doesnt't sit at his desk he stands) 

Name: Ruth | Date: Sep 8th, 2005 2:30 AM
I agree about the meds, but i know that they have help my son a great deal, without them he could not fuction. Even i could not handle him at home and now have very little promblem form him. 

Name: Jo JO | Date: Sep 8th, 2005 2:31 PM
Honey you put your foot down for your son, you go and talk to anyone that might give you advise, more knowledge, and support. Find out the laws for such things to that sort. I am sorry but hyperactive children are not the problem in the schools, it is the neglect that the hyper active children gt from the school district to study and understand them and find new ways to teach them.....that does not sound right to me girlfriend, and I will keep you and your son in my prayer....oh by the way...they ARE doing this for their own wellfare, not your son's. 

Name: Kimberley Troesch | Date: Sep 9th, 2005 11:27 PM
Yes. My son has beedn diagnosed with adhd. He can be a handful. He also has had problems at school. I should tell you, I chose to pull my son from his meds. I talked this over with his doctor first. Two meds almost hospitilized him for high blood pressure. The others made him act like a zombie. That just wasn't the way my son should be. The teachers at his school kind of gave me a fit. I finally had to find someone who would stand behind me and help me tell them it was my choice not theirs. In case you are wondering, it was an attorney. Kevin (my son) still has his days, but the behavioral therapy does seem to be working. His attention in school still isn't great, but it is getting better. To me, the meds were covering up the problem, not helping it. I'm not sure if this helps you, but I have been there. 

Name: Jenn | Date: Oct 10th, 2005 7:16 PM
My son has been diagnosed with adhd since he was three, I didn't start meds until he was 10, I hated giving him this pill, but he was wild and people were judging him and that killed me. He started on concerta and started having tics. That scared me to death. Then we started him on statterra and he was calm but very sad at times. Big time mood swings. I went web surfing and found out that the makers of stratterra are admitting that it causes suicidal thoughts in children. I am very mad that i didn't get these warnings before we started these differen't meds.
good luck and feel free to e-mail me [email protected] 

Name: cathy | Date: Oct 31st, 2005 3:29 AM
Been there fellow mum, got the t-shirt, and even when your son is dignosed it won't make any diffrence, everyone will still expect him to be like every boy his age. because he has a dissability you can't see 

Name: appalled | Date: Nov 1st, 2005 4:49 PM
they did the same thing to my son ... however you need to educate yourself about the law...... depending on where you live your son has the right to have (IEP, 504, or an sat) written on him .. this is a civil right for children with behavioral problems and possible medical conditions.. This forces the teachers, parents and medical professionals to work together for the betterment of your child. They can not zero him out as a problem or make a specticle out of him.. Check into the laws and see abouthte doctor writting a letter to support your desire .. there could be sever other things you can look into.. this could be allergies.. this could be a chemical imbalance sio many things... 1st start with the Dr., 2nd Educate yourself on the law.. Tell the school this is not acceptable. Talk to the principal. (after you know yours and your sons rights.) Trust me the school wont know hwat hit them when you come marching in and let them know you know the law. If you have any other questions.. email me july13ruby at yahoo dot com 

Name: carolee pursell | Date: Jan 25th, 2006 2:29 AM
There are many teachers who are burnt out and can only tolerate little girls who sit still and are quiet and hang on there every word. They should get out of teaching if they can't handle individual differences. Putting him in the hall is not a solution. Have you tried medication. It helps the kids conform to more of what the teachers want, can help him comcentrate, and stop getting yelled at. 

Name: Kelly | Date: Jan 25th, 2006 3:16 AM
I am teacher and do resent the comment about teachers wanting little girls who will sit and hang on every word. I'm sure there are teacher's (very few) that might at times do that, but on a whole techers really want their students to do well. Besides being a teacher, I am also the parent of a boy with ADHD, who is in second grade. He is also on medicine now for 3 years. The decison to put any child on medication should never be for the child to be able to conform to what anybody wants, not teachers, not even parents. Children are individuals. When it comes to children with ADHD they are unique in their own way. ADHD is different for every kid. Putting a child on medicine is a very big decision to make. If you choose to put your child on medication it should be to help the child feel good about themselves, to show them that they can do the things that they might have had trouble with and to let them know why they couldn't do it before. People should do whats good for them and their family, not tp make it easier on someone else. 

Name: savanahd1@ aol.com | Date: Mar 4th, 2006 5:56 PM
Yes and I don't know what to do about it. my son is bright, well meaning kind and attractive but some teachers can't seem to stand him. he is not rude or any livlier than some of the other boys, but he dosn't like to sit still, he gets good grades but he is beging to hate school work. wendy, Long Island 

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Name: melissa | Date: Apr 6th, 2006 11:29 PM
i think that is not fair to him. they should treat every kid the same. and not send him to another school. 

Name: Martie | Date: Jun 11th, 2006 8:05 PM
Darlin sad to say but I have been dealing with this issue since my son was in pre-K. You have to develop good relationships with the Teachers, that seems to be the only way to get them to work with you. I wish you luck in this area It took 9 years for me to find out that my son was not only ADHD but had Bi-polar disorder as well. He is now repeating the 6th grade this year but I think it will be to his benefit. Wish you luck!! Get to know the TYeachers and be their right hand helper...It is the only way I have found that they will over look the "problem" child. 

Name: erica | Date: Jun 11th, 2006 8:58 PM
I've been facing those same issues since my son started school at age4 (he is now 6), I felt like the world was against him. This summer he saw a Doc and indeed has ADHD, so this diagnosis will help him in the long run...because they will have to accomade him and not kick him out to another school. I feel alone now but have found local support groups that are helping understand hi rights! It will get better! Erica 

Name: Layne | Date: Jun 12th, 2006 12:33 AM
Leahs post is right on.... The schools will do anything to bully the situation so you pay for the testing especialy now days with all the cut backs they simply dont have the funding. My son was tested by a diagnostic team of three doctors that specialize in adhd and other neoralgical issues. It did boil down to adhd. but who would know that becouse many, many symptoms that apear adhd can be like 19 other deseases. Being said test the child and dont let him suffer with at school one day longer then needed. the medication my son is on helps him with school and social life. I dont think at this time there is any other answers for us . i spend many hours on the computer and library researching other avenues. now they are complaining of my daughter being inatentive. she gets good grades though.so I go and volunteer in her class room this gives me a inside veiw of the situation and I also know what is expected of her in the class room. this has helped her so much she has credentialed out of title one and resorse. But she is right on the cuff so we are in summer school and we in summer reading program at our local library. We just cant let our guard down.
Find out your rights in your state. get involved in your school some way some how. This keeps teachers on there toes as well. fight like hell for your kids and it will help your sons confidence if you are involved the other kids will lay off some what. my thoughts are with you and honey you are not alone. just look at all the caring parents responding to your post. 

Name: joanne | Date: Aug 23rd, 2006 4:48 AM
how sad to hear my son is 8 ,diagnosed 1 year ago and instead of sending him out side they joke by calling him the human teabag, his classmates put him on a timer to the teachers amazment my son learnt how to tell the time properly,its such a shame these people cannot embrace these smart but lost soul's.im sure your son is a treat in the right posative company....??????? 

Name: pamela | Date: Jan 16th, 2008 8:28 PM
My son has ADHD with a learning disability secondary to a recnet diagnosis of hig funching Autism. Get your child help soon and get a real diagnosis. The school has to provide special schooling for your child. If he does not display any psyco problems then they have to pay for his help. Tell them you are going to get a child advocate and that might get them to comply. And if you could prove that your child is being singled out then that is grounds for reporting. Have you ever seen the no child left behind act. 

Name: Nicki | Date: Jan 17th, 2008 4:06 PM
IT IS HORRIBLE THAT ANYONE COULD HATE A CHILD...SHOW HIM LOTS OF LOVE AND ATTENTION AND LET HIM KNOW THAT MOMMY WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR HIM 

Name: missy | Date: Jan 18th, 2008 6:44 PM
teachers dont like children who have any kind of problems in their classrooms, even though they say they treat each child individual and fairly. ive experienced this first hand. my daughter is almost 14 and has been out of school for a year now. and im having real problems getting her another one. ive tried 10 different schools now and they all say it would be a drain on their resources and unfair on other kids. ever since she went to school its been just the same, being put out, sent home early not allowed to join in school trips, not getting invitited to birthday parties. her last school treated her disgracefuly and im takin legal advice. the only thing i can tell you to do is to speak to the childrens law centre and get a solicitor on the case to help you 

Name: kelly | Date: Mar 4th, 2008 2:14 AM
my son is 10 years old and he has adhd it is hard but i dont let people look at him diffrent but the school dose he is always in the office for stuff he has not done he dose not get along with people 

Name: tj2728 | Date: Mar 5th, 2008 10:25 PM
My son is 14 he has adhd, odd and suspected aspergers syndrome, he was diagnosed really late at age 14. My husband and i have managed his behaviour at home without medication until dec 07 when he started taking concerta xl. He is now attending his 3rd senior school, which is brilliant, but it only has around 6 students on any 1 day, he has learnt so much more in the couple of months he has been compared to years at his other schools. I have spoken to other parents with children with similar or the same problems and everyone agrees mainstream schools are not trained enough in dealing or teaching our children the government need to do more to accommodate them without making them feel like outcasts. 

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