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I have been divorced for 3 + years now. I have a 11 year old daughter and a 15 year old son. I pay my child support religously and I've tried tremendously to be part of their lives. Seems the only time I hear from them is birthdays' and Xmas. My ex wanted me back twice and I've said no way both times. I was the one who raised my children.... cooked, cleaned, coached, homework, etc.. and I feel like I've been used. I'm tired of trying to do nice things for my children and them forgeting about me. Incidently, they never remember anyone on my side of the family. Her parents were the outspoken ones during the divorce and my parents minded their own business. Also, she was the cheating one and remarried 2 months after our divorce. I had thought that my children might have been turned against me, but they do have minds of their own. Father's day I didn't even get a phone call. I've had it. I will never buy another thing for them, nor will I remember birthdays or holidays. I'm going to move a few states away and start a fresh life with my fiance. Thanks for letting me rant and rave. I needed it. It did help, however, I still feel very cold toward my children. ↓
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| Name: pj754 | Date: Jul 5th, 2006 8:01 PM |
| Don't give up on your kids!!!! You know they do love you! Your ex is using them against you. Since you won't take her back they are the only one she can use against you even though you love them so dearly. Don't lose sight of that. My ex wouldn't let me see or communicate with my son when we had an arguement and chose to live with his father. Yet, I truly believe it was his father feeding his head full of bs. Hang in there!! Tell them how much you love them, instill the good qualities you have always done and keep doing. Be Patient!!! Yes, it's very hard to say but you have too. For their sakes. One day, they will realize you have always been there for them, no matter what. Speaking from experience, my parents never really gave me the love I wanted. Yet, I know I can pass the love onto my children even though I lacked it. It was more important to me than material things which my step-father thought was so important. All I wanted was love. I will never get it from them. Yet, I know my children do love me despite what their father is trying to do them. Such as telling them I'm a piece of crap, I don't care about them, etc..... I am trying so hard to lay a good foundation for them to have a good adult life but their father tries so hard to interfer. As long as they keep hearing what I say, I can only pray one day they will hear it. They know from right and wrong, my 12 and 7 year old realize it but my 13 year old is a little septical. I feel as long as I keep plugging away at what I know in my heart is right, one day he will get the picture. He has a lot of qualities of his father, lazy, irresponsible, etc... But I feel repitition will do some good. As much as I don't want him to feel like a lost cause, I will keep voicing my opinion on how much I love him. If and when he gets into serious trouble, I will keep talking to him even though he may not want to hear it. I'm a firm believer and letting him realize, one day he will hear it. So, love them with your whole heart and mind. That's all you can do for know. Keep teaching them like you have done because one day it will pay off. May not be so soon but eventually it will come around, it always does. Cheer up, you sound like a very responsible man with good qualities, keep doing what your doing even though your future life takes you else way. Children always need to know they are loved, no matter what happens in their life. If your ex refuses to allow to see the children or talk with them, be persistant. They need to know daddy will always care. No problems in venting, I have done enough of it. Well we all have different answers and I hope this helps. ↑ |
| Name: Lizzi | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 2:41 AM |
| Some women hate their ex's more than they love their children,sad but true! ↑ |
| Name: lilredgal | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 7:44 PM |
| it's not necasaaily the kids fault. as a single mom I've seen too of my male friends get treated like ths. and it's the kids who hurt more. crying shame but hang in there, cause it all comes back around. anyways, i have exact opposite problem . no sign of my daughters dad for 12 years. so who is worse ? guys or gals / good luck and if u want w/b [email protected] ↑ |
| Name: Sad Dad | Date: Jul 17th, 2006 8:20 PM |
What happens when you call all the time and get nothing but an answering machine? What happens when you send cards and letters and get no answer? What happens when father's day rolls around and you get nothing.... not even a phone call. What happens when your birthday rolls around and you get no call?
What happens then???? ↑ |
| Name: mio diddo | Date: Jul 28th, 2010 9:43 AM |
| puzzled and confused, i cant understand up until now my time being there during hospital care day and knights i preying for you to get well . it was the closest most rewarding feeling i have ever experience in my life!. well besides the birth of our kids. 4th of jully was unforgettable !. the tex messages are still on my phone , including the one from DIOSITO .just the closest moments of my life which i enjoyed will last me a lifetime .i will remember this for ever GOD BLESS YOU...... ↑ |
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