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Name: craynor5
[ Original Post ]
My ex-husband and I got divorced when our child was a year old and she did not seem to be bothered by any of it until just recently. She is now six and her daddy has started to date someone new and she is acting all sad with him and says that she does not want to leave him but when she is with him she calls me to tell me that she misses me. She also does not mention anything about her daddy during the week. I feel that she is just trying to get his attention by telling him that she misses him and she never says it to him in front of me either. This is not the first new person in his life since our divorce he has been married twice and divorced twice since me. He seems to think that she is acting like this because she is torn and wants to be with both of us and does not know how to act. I do not beleive that this is the case because we have been divorced for five years now. I would beleive that this was the case if we had recently gotten divorced but we did not. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I should handle this? When I told my ex-husband that we should all sit down together and talk to her about it he said he did not think that we needed to but I feel that we should. Am I right or am I wrong please someone tell if any of you have had to deal with this and if so what did you do? Thank you for all of your advice.
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Name: raychelrampagex | Date: Jan 30th, 2009 7:22 PM
Definitely sit down and talk.
I have been through many divorces with my mother.
My mother and father got divorced when I was 2 and my brother was 4. During the time that they were divorced (before the death of my father at age 8) my dad had girlfriends.

I remember feeling the same way.
Once your child is a teen, or even younger perhaps, she will understand. But, right now, you need to explain to her that you both love her very much and you and her daddy still love each other very much, but not the way you used to.

It is completely normal for her to striving for her fathers attention. Do you have custody and he has visitation rights? If so, she may be wanting more of his attention than the new lady that he has. 

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