About a month before Easter I started feeling like something was going on in my marriage. I had been in a depression over her spending habits and knowing that I loved her more than she loved me but i delt with it because she brought the greatest thing into my life which was a 8 and 7 year old boys. I was in a 7 year relationship before that the woman i was with after trying EVERYTHING she just couldnt have them. Over about 4-5 years it became apparent to me that
she didnt have the ability or the desire to help parent the kids. I took a job below me to be more flexible and could haddle all of the matters dealing with the kids. To make a very long story a little shorter during this month before i knew what was coming but when i asked her if she was leaving me she suggested we go to counseling. I had suggested it 3 years earlier and she agreed to and kept blowing it off till i gave up. Still i still felt like she was leaving me and i usually go about 180 lbs and am 6'4". I started losing weight and could not sleep. She also suggested that we go to the beach with another couple on a weekend after she did her training for her 3rd new job in the last 9 months (nurse). A week later and still not sleeping or eating much she tells me what the date is i agree and a couple of days later realize that the weekend is easter sunday. I went back to her and said we couldnt go because of that and she would not budge. I finally agreed out of exaltion and she went to her training and I went over 1 night at her training and my mother stayed with the boys a junior and senior in high school. While I was over there a man came out of the next room and was visibly upset to the point I said to my wife wonder what he is so upset about. DUH. She got back from her training that Friday and i apoligized to the boys and my mom did Easter with them. I will never forgive myself for that!! but i was trying to save our marriage. We went over a she got more and more cold toward me and we came back sunday night. I was now down 2 157lbs now and i had probily been getting a hour of sleep a night for about 2 weeks. When we got back that night i said to her i only want to ask 1 question about what we are going to talk about in counseling are you leaving me and finally now that she completed her training and had here weekend at the beach she finally told me with no expression on her face. I was totally devistated and told her that she would have to tell the boys so once again on easter sunday the boys get another wonderful gift. After she told them they stormed out of the room and she actually asked me why they reacted like that and i was to shocked to give the answer. I left that night and went to my moms. After about a week i started 2 snap out of it and decided i would consintrate on the boys and figured that she would have to spend more time with the boys. I find out she had the new guy in the house 2 days after I was out and going through my fishing rods and u can guess how my boys reacted to that. There mom asked that the boys not tell the grandparents on her side of the family and not to tell me what is going on. I confronted her over the phone about bringing him over and she continued to say there wasnt another man. Finally I told her who he was and where he worked (high school teacher) she told me if i made trouble she would move out of state and i wouldnt be able to see my 17 yr old. I was in a better state of mind and i told her that if she did that he would move in with me and that she needed to take a step back and look at what she is doing to the kids and that it was wrong and her kids were going to hate her for this. Tonight I get a call from my son and he told me that he called his mom he was working and needed a ride home because she didnt leave any gas in the car so the older son could pick him up and she refused to pick him up. He hung up on her and she called back and said "I know you didnt hang up on me
or there will be big trouble" how the hell does she expect them 2 act and thats why I am asking for advise they told me tonight that she has not stayed over night with them but twice in the last three weeks and the youngest has called her a whore a week after the breakup and tonight he told me he hated her and cant understand why she wont spend any time or give any effort for him. Meanwhile my oldest should be having the time of his life graduating from hs is stuck taking care of his younger brother. I spend 3-4 days a week with the boys now and only for a limited time because I have 2 work and get back on my feet and they are busy with there job and school. Both are getting scolarships to colleges and i have had the talk with them about not letting moms and my problems mess up what they have worked so hard for. But i am really scared 4 my youngest that once his brother is gone he is going to go down the wrong path. I dont know what to say to her so i suggested that they sit down with there mom , without yelling, and say what is on there mind and work out more time together. If anyone has any other suggestions please let me know. I am sorry this was so long but I needed to vent and i needed to paint the picture. Any suggestions would be appriciated thanks ↓
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