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Name: angeleth
[ Original Post ]
This is my second marriage, we've been together 6 years and married 4. He is an awesome father to my 8year old from my previous marriage. We found out we were pregnant at 2 months, and he seemed happy- after all it was his 1st child. He is 13 years my senior- 50 years old. I am a professional woman, and the head of our household. Our primary challenge, he competes with me instead of us collaborating as a team. He appears to have a serious inferiority complex, and I figured that the baby would create equity and lift his spirits. I was wrong, as we approach the due date, he has become somewhat bipolar, knit picking at everything. He seems interested when his family is around, and plays the role of a dotting 1st time father, however when we are alone... I am truly alone, we don't even talk anymore. I am frustrated, and cry at times, he is unaware of the way he is treating me, and whenever I muster up the courage to share- he fails back on, he is the victim. I am beginning to believe that I can make it through without him, as he provides very little support as it is. He is he vindictive type that will fight to the death, if I were to divorce him and move on with his only child. He recently re-enrolled in school to earn his degree, and I have been supportive. I do support his goals and dreams, but what seems to fuel his new motivation as a school bus driver, is not to provide a better quality of life for our expected daughter- instead it serves to supersede me in my professional pursuits and accomplishments. He had the nerve to tell me that if our baby daughter does listen to him when she is born, he is going to have nothing to do with her. An innocent baby is already at his mercy. I have relied on faith, to bring me through this difficult time. I still care about him, but he is not the man I married. Granted he is from a culture where men lead the household- and I guess he took a gamble on the turning the tables and after 4 years he has had enough. Well, I am at my breaking point now! He has threatened to leave during our arguments, but he has never tried. My guess is, the lack of stability, now he is a student, and has little to no savings- and it would prove a challenge living the same quality of life he lives with me. When a couple is expecting their first baby together, and his first baby overall there should be joy! I have no regrets over the conception of my first daughter, I just wish it was with someone else who appreciates having a child. He begged me to have the baby, because I expressed he concern about his fickle attitude. Now I really don't mind if he leaves of his own free will this time around. Happy I found this forum as an outlet to detail my feelings...
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