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Name: meme1983
[ Original Post ]
Ok, I have been with my bf for 2 years now. I started dating him as soon as I left my ex ( the father of my girls). My girls were 5 and 1 at the time. My daughter was, understandably, upset and wasn't always as well behaved as she should have been. She started telling him almost right away that he wasn't as strong as her daddy or as tall or ...etc. She was her daddy's little angel. I corrected her when she said mean things like that but I was quick to let it go because I understood why she was doing it. Now fastforward 2 yrs. and my bf and her CANNOT get along at all. She doesn't have much contact now with her father (he moved away and is working on a new family ...?) . My bf and my youngest daughter have gotten very close and he thinks of her as his own. But not my oldest....everything she does is wrong now in his eyes. I know she has hurt his feelings pretty badly without realizing it when she was younger but that's no reason for an adult to act this way with a child ...she is only 7! Not that he is the only one to blame here either. She is still very rude to him at times and seems to try to get him going. When he trys to send her to her room for misbehaving she won't go until he takes her by the arm and tries to walk her there and then she falls to the floor crying saying he hurt her ( when I am there and see that he didnt' hurt her at all). I can understand his complete lack of patience with her sometimes but at other times I wish he would try harder. It's like trying to stop 2 children from arguing at all times in my house ! I am the only person that she will listen to ( she for some reason thinks that she doesn't have to listen to anyone else...family members included). Does anyone have and ideas that they think may help here ? Help him to have more patience when dealing with her and help showing her that she has to listen to him ? It is driving me crazy living with the 2 of them and if I have to choose ....well, there is no choice ....my girls will always come first and I've told him this before and he tries, but it always ends up the same way as before....constant disrespect on both sides. Please help ?! ?
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Name: autumn_leaves | Date: Oct 11th, 2007 4:19 PM
Your boyfriend needs to grow up and realize she is 7 years old. The next time she treats him this way, since you are the one she listens to you need to tell her disrespecting your boyfriend will not be tolerated. Maybe this will make him feel better also and come around. You also need to tell him mistreating your daughter will not be tolerated, and they will both know their place and hopefully begin to respect each other. If not, you should find a more mature man who can see your 7 year old is still a child. 

Name: poke | Date: Nov 23rd, 2009 6:58 PM
I went through this with my wife and son. well ex wife now. She blames the end of our marraige on my son. She just needed to grow up. She would start a fight with him and then get mad because he would get mad. Kids? what can you do.

I don't think she should have ever had kids because she can't handle any of them. I have my daugher and her son most of the time since she's been gone. i love her son as much as I do my own kids so I don't think he should be punished for her actions. One of these days she's going to grow up look back a feel like a peace of crap. 

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