| Name: mimie | Date: Sep 29th, 2008 1:29 AM |
| i love my husband but feel that he doesn't feel the same way i dont want to be in this relationship anymore he do not understand me what should i do ↑ |
| Name: Pat | Date: Oct 2nd, 2008 3:17 AM |
| i am so confused as to how men make the decision to marry, my husband and I have been married for one year and he decided that he doesnt want to be married anymore cause he likes being single when he hangs out and married when convenient. I am very sad and confused, we are living in the same house, I don't feel that I should move out, he's the one that is unhappy and wants to be single, but he is not going anywhere either. I would like to make my marriage work, but he doesn't care about anything but drinking and hanging out with his friends. ↑ |
| Name: jen | Date: Oct 2nd, 2008 7:54 PM |
| Reassure him that you love him but don't over do it. If he really doesn't love you, there isn't alot you can do to change it . But there is someone out there who will love you and your children. ↑ |
| Name: niki | Date: Oct 4th, 2008 8:16 AM |
| I too am a victim of this. I supported my husband by working and taking care of the home and 4 kids while he got his medical degree and he just started his first job as a surgeon 1 month ago. Everything was perfect. He always showed me affection and told me I was "the bomb." I never saw this coming, but he's been distant for the last 2 weeks and last night he said he isn't happy anymore and he needs space away from me and the kids. He said he doesn't want to abandon me, but he needs time to sort out his stress. His dad called today and told me that my husband wanted to talk to him about his marriage and that he wasn't sure if he wanted to be married. I thought we would stay together forever, now all he does is cry and apologize to me, telling me to stay and let the kids stay here in school and he'll leave for a while. I can't stay and handle everything that I've been taking care of - all the finances, the children, the house - everything by myself! I could always manage to handle things because I knew it was for the good of "the team" and he loved me. He wants me to wait here while he goes away for a month to find out who he is. I love him so much, but all I can think to do now is find a lawyer and get my kids out of this situation. I would have never had kids, especially my son, if I had even the slightest expectation that his dad would walk out on us. I don't know how to raise a man. I grew up in a house with 5 women and all my oldest children are girls. We tried one more time because he wanted a boy. What do I do? I want to stand with him through his depression but I don't want to wait for him to play the field and use me as a doormat when convenient. I don't think he enjoys having sex with me anymore. What did I do wrong? ↑ |
| Name: Valerie | Date: Oct 28th, 2008 6:30 PM |
| My husband just recently told me that he wants to seperate then asked his mother how much a divorce would cost him. He share a 16 month old but he is raising my 2 boys ( one is 4 and one is 2) from another relationship as his own. I love my husband with all my heart and he is definately my high school sweetheart. I know he is going thru alot right now with a custody battle for his son and his grandmother passing away. I have not heard of too many seperated couples reconciling, and i am terrified... I dont know what to do and I am racking my brain trying to figure it out. Please any help would be greatly appreciated... I can be emailed at [email protected] Thank you in advance. ↑ |
| Name: crushed in Omaha | Date: Nov 1st, 2008 2:00 AM |
| My husband of 18 years recently told me that he isn't in love with me anymore. He loves me as the mother of his children, as a person, and a friend. It has been a little over 2 weeks since he's left and I am struggling with the "whys". It's hard not to feel rejected but I have to keep telling myself that it is not all my fault. I hate to think that we never had a marital sacrament; otherwise how could he just "walk away?" I am trying to stay positive and to hold onto my faith that I'm hoping will keep me grounded. My children need me, so I must get myself together and be strong when everything else in my life seems wrong. Suicide definitely is not the answer, but sometimes the pain is much bigger and it becomes an answer. I am so crushed by all this. It really is hard to see the light. If any of you have comforting words for me, please tell me. I could sure use some encouragement. ↑ |
| Name: crushed in Omaha | Date: Nov 1st, 2008 2:05 AM |
| Valerie, try not to panic. What the experts say, and I'm no expert, but they say to stay calm and think positive. Separated couples do reconcile if it's meant to be. God has a plan for everything and what doesn't break us will make us stronger. I tell myself whatever it takes to get through this. I know it's hard. But grieve, get strong and think about how you can handle your husband's stress without causing him more stress. Look to lighten the load for him for now and once he is less stressed, maybe he too will see things in a better light. ↑ |
| Name: SameGirl | Date: Nov 7th, 2008 4:27 AM |
I caught my husband talking online and on the phone with another woman and she was sending him nude pics and he said he fell in love with her because she was so nice and I'm not anymore. Probably some truth in that, because as he spent more and more time communicating with her, he spent less and less time talking to me -- but I had no idea she was even in the picture until recently. He said we've never had a good marriage and he's never loved me. So we've have a few horrid arguments wherein I remind him of all the things I've sacrificed for him and this marriage and that he's stupid to think a woman he met online is a better catch than me, who has never cheated on him and served him hand and foot since we got married. I told him that any woman who can break up a marriage and not care about the wife or the children is not a "nice" woman and that I hopes he gets what he deserves when he shacks up with her but by then it will be too late. I called him selfish, stupid, self-centered, immature, irresponsible, unreliable and the biggest loser I'd ever met. Told him I'd be happy for him to move out so I can go out dating again and find myself a man I can respect and maybe even find someone who is better than he is in bed.
Two days later my husband said he was sorry, cut off communication with the other girl and said he wanted to make it work.
Don't play the victim.
Kick his ass. ↑ |
| Name: lonelylady | Date: Nov 19th, 2008 12:49 AM |
| my boyfriend doesn't love me!! ↑ |
| help he wants a divorce after 30 years ↑ |
| Iam so glad i found this site .goes to show how desperate I am for a reason he is doing this to me .we have been married for 30 years .he ia Air Force retired so i had to follow him for 20 years .I am a new yorker and he ia a miltary bratt we have 2 children {well adult kids } in there 20.we have had a very hard and rough marriged never really got along complete opposites but i love him. {sick isnt it} My family has been going thru alot of termoil in deaths and sickness. mom.sister and brothers .he decides we my children and myself move to houston texas and leave that all behind , we did .now we want to go back home and told him we dont like it here we tried but it didnt work, he tells me he wants a divorce he will not be returning with us and he never really was happy with me ,after 30 years .this is like the 3rd time he has asked me for a divorce i usally breakdown try and kill myself ,beg him for mercy and it goes away and he comes back . i know my love for him is one sided ,i have been a very good wife rasied our kids alone in some off the wall place away from family and alone all the time waiting for him.now he is doing it again .he left 6 years ago when we lived in ny he quit his job and got on his bike and road to houston texas to his mamas house .after i beged him and had a breakdown he came back and things have never been the same . no love no compasonon and no sex .please help me i know i am not going to make it .i know i am going to die , my e mail is [email protected] for advice please anyone out there who has had a simular experance i need your help ↑ |
| Name: flamingo | Date: Nov 24th, 2008 9:29 PM |
My husband left me 4 days ago and its breaking my heart, I have not eaten or slept, I am trying to be strong for our 12 yr old son. But every time i cry he cries.
He could not even tell me to my face he left a note, Saying he did not love me anymore.
He is taking our son out tomorrow, And he wants to speak to me. I know what about where i am going to live, And how to move me there. I am so sad, I love him so much, I just need someone to talk to. ↑ |
| Name: flamingo | Date: Nov 27th, 2008 12:05 AM |
| He came to see my son yesterday like he said, Then we had a talk, He said he wanted to try again and moved is stuff back in that day . Then on the night he said he was confused about his feeling about me, so he went to a hotel, next day he came and got his stuff again and said he did not love me, But he loved this women he started dating aweek ago, he had been friends at work when she worked there, So another broken heart for me. I know this is the end now, . I have just got to get over him, But it is going to be hard, As I love him so much. Thank you if anyone is listening. ↑ |
| Name: Anne | Date: Dec 6th, 2008 9:19 AM |
| First I am so sorry that he would tell you that. I know it hurts but we have to respect there wishes not to be with us. My husband told me the same thing about a year ago. The thing is if he doesn't want to stay with you he will only make you and your children miserable and they (or You) don't deserve that. I was rasied in a family where my mom though she had to stay with my dad and deal with the emotional abuse year after year. In return both of my sisters have been in abusive marriages and mine isn't all that great either. Someone has to call a stop to all this and if not us then who? Our kids must not think it's acceptable to be treated this way. Good luck to you. ↑ |
| Name: Anne | Date: Dec 6th, 2008 9:25 AM |
| Flamingo , Someone is always listening. The worst thing is to feel like no ones listening or cares. So be assured I do care and hope things start getting better for you soon. Good luck! ↑ |
| Name: Cherie | Date: Dec 11th, 2008 8:02 AM |
My husbad says we have grown apart and he doenst want to be married he misses being single. he is 55 and I am 58 we never do fight.
This is our first deal, I want him to try but the wall is so tall I cant get him to touch me he is in the other room
He doesnt want to take me to the xmas party at his work.
He wants me to leave after almost nine years no kids wht should I do ↑ |
| Name: citygal | Date: Dec 15th, 2008 3:07 AM |
| I am new at this, I have been married 25 years my husband does not want to be married anymore. I am just looking for others that share the same problem. ↑ |
| Name: shar | Date: Dec 21st, 2008 5:02 AM |
With me change is ridiculously hard. Especially if it's toward something I know is good for me but I don't really want. For example, I will be so happy after I've made this transition and I'm out of this broken marriage. One step at a time... Be kind and don't blame yourself.
(I hope my words will help someone). ↑ |
| Name: Why? | Date: Dec 24th, 2008 10:20 PM |
| If this site is meant for only women, I apologize - but I'm confused as to what to do here. I've been married (2nd marriage) for 4+ years, I have two children from my 1st marriage - Boy 10, Girl 11 - step daughter 11 - - enough with the intro's, however, I've fallen out of love with my wife - our relationship went from fun, love & "we-time" to complaining about everything all the time. Don't want to put the kids through a divorce, but we fight all the time and I'm just afraid to go through this all again - I'm miserable emotionally - what to do???? and please, don't mention counsiling - been there, done that - not a fan! ↑ |
| Name: deena | Date: Jan 7th, 2009 11:52 PM |
| I have been married for 12 years and yesterday my husband told me that he was not in love with me anymore and that we should divorce. he is being very nice to me but i cannot stand the thought of living without him. how can i make him love me again? ↑ |
| Name: inah | Date: Jan 16th, 2009 4:25 PM |
| i thought i am the only one having this kind of problem.Before we were married my husband has an affair with a married woman but he get back to me.I accepted him hoping he will forget his feelings to the girl.while we are together we always had arguments about his affair.Coz he still continues to keep in touch with her.So i got mad and ended up fighting with him. one time after a big fight he told me he doesn't love me anymore.but i still hold on to him hoping he will learn to love me again.unexpected came,i got pregnant.So my first thought is to get married right away.BIG MISTAKE!we were married for two yrs now and have two kids.But i suspect that until now he can't forget his past and he did not bring back his love for me.but he is very responsible and loving father to our kids. if i were you just hold on to your marriage, maybe someday he will realize that he still love you. ↑ |
| Name: peter | Date: Jan 23rd, 2009 6:22 PM |
hai
FINE
i am lonely my wife is in india i fffffffffffff eeeeeee llllllllllllll tooo hot ↑ |
| Name: marian | Date: Jan 30th, 2009 2:39 AM |
Hi there,
Very interesting stories.. I also am in the same boat as all you women. Husband last august say he's leaving after 28 years together..2 great boys we have 20 and 17..he says he has feelings for me still but no longer knows if that's enough..he wants something new and fresh in his life and feels he has sacrificed the last 20 something years for me and the boys and now it's time to live his life..oh I am a mess..lost 50 pounds now..he left with nothing and wants nothing from the house..he is now living in a basement apartment with borrowed stuff..saddens me to see this..want him back not sure why or sure how to work on a reconcilliation since he says he doesn't one day and who knows what the future holds..he has kept me on a rollercoaster of emotions...how do you move on and pull yourself together and why is it men can just walk out and move on so easily???? ↑ |
| Name: Erin | Date: Feb 13th, 2009 2:00 AM |
| I am too going through this, my husband of 8 years has decided that he no longer is happy being married and that he doesn't want to hurt me, but is just no longer happy with me. This hurts and is so painful. My heart is just breaking we have a blended family already and it is so hard to let him go, but I don't want someone who doesn't want me... ↑ |
| Name: Christina | Date: Mar 7th, 2009 10:42 PM |
| I would like to talk to a married husband who is twenty and twenty four ↑ |
| Name: Linda | Date: Mar 8th, 2009 11:47 PM |
4 years ago I found our my husband was have an affair with another woman. We are trying to rekindle our marriage,but I am having trouble with trust, confidence, and romance.
My Husband is doing everything to earn forgiveness and wants our marriage back. An added hurdle is that I am in full menopause. How can I find my husband again. How can I be in love again. ↑ |
| Name: Pamela | Date: Mar 22nd, 2009 10:45 PM |
My husband/partner of 13 years wants out of my life. We have a 3 yr old daughter. He says she'll be fine, but she recently woke up at night in tears 2x in one night and once the next night for this abandonment. I feel it, 2 but now I'm used to doing things for myselt, keeping busy and making new friends, unlike b4. I'm learning a hard lesson, reading HEAL YOUR LIFE by Louise Hay, & trying to live life at the fullest, 4 me & my family. I must stop thinking in the negative, cause I don;t want my worst fears!
Day by day, hoping it will mend itself. I've given him space & don't ask 2 many q's. He sleeps in daughters' room after his nightly adventures.
PT ↑ |
| Name: Karen | Date: Mar 23rd, 2009 9:15 PM |
| My husband is a works all the time and we have been married for 18 years now i think we are both just two tired to go on being married ↑ |
| Name: aicha | Date: Mar 27th, 2009 11:11 AM |
| my husband had affair and i found out about it i have spoken to this other girl and she told me everything and about her being in my house having sex with him its hurt me so much its taking over my life like now i feel he doesn,t love me now ↑ |
| Name: jason | Date: Apr 24th, 2009 8:29 PM |
| Name: Theresa | Date: Apr 26th, 2009 8:31 PM |
I have been married 25years. Great marriage. Know in our small community/town/county as one those "pefect couples. I truly thougth it, too. I have bever been a jealous person. Always felt confident in my marriage, comfortable and secure in marriage. Alwyas felt loved. Then wham - out ot the blue he starts speding time, callling, text-messaging, having lunch, going to yoga classes, to the gu, with this 39 year old girl. (He's 64.) and by the time I realize what is happening, he is so non-committal to me thathe tlls me he hasn't love me in a long time because I have gotten fat, and he preeives my weight gain as a pesonal affront. (He has not alwys been slim, just got that way due recently, due to being diagnosed as diatetic.) I was devastated - in shock - never saw it coming, and just couldn't understabnd. This girl he's spending time with is short and fatter than me.
Gone through four months of hell. He nows says he loves me, and would never leave me.
But - he will not admit that what he ha with her was an affair......simply because they didn't have sex. I say it was an aemotinal affair, and that it hurts me just as bad.
he thinks I'm crazy and over-reacting.
What do I do.
I see a pcychiatrist - just because I have no desire to live. Don't want to kill myself....just have no desire to live.
It'segg-shelss and indiffernt politenessin our house.
We have accumulated a lot in 25 years. He is very powerful in our town. Has ever Judge, attorney, prosecutor, the sheriff.....everyone in his back pocket. I have no one.
What do I do.
My child is 24 and sides with her DAD.
MOM IS JUST A CRAZY, MEAN, BITCH. ↑ |
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