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Name: Margee
[ Original Post ]
Hi. I'm new to this board. I would really appreciate any advice anyone can give me. I've been dating a divorced man for 4 months now. He was already divorced after we met. He has a 6 yr old daughter and he is a wonderful father. His ex-wife is from Panama. To make a long story short, my boyfriend brought his 6 yr old daughter to meet me and this angered his ex. She has been using her ex as a puppet and now sees me as a threat as our relationship grows deeper. She is so angry that she has threatened to take the little girl to Panama to keep her father from seeing her because I am in the picture. I don't want to give in to this woman and have to give up my relationship with her ex, but I don't want to be the cause of him losing his daughter. I know she can't legally take the child out of the country to live, but what legal recourse does he have if she does so. Thanks for your advice.
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Name: Mike | Date: Jul 6th, 2006 8:24 AM
don't fight for used "straw" look around for a fresh "straw" elsewhere! 

Name: pj754 | Date: Jul 6th, 2006 12:50 PM
Your boyfriend needs to speak with his attorney about his ex's threats. I believe she has to get permission by the courts to take the daughter back to Panama. That would probably involve counseling to see if it would be in the best interest of the child. You and your boyfriend have a right to be happy and progress into a life together. She has no right to control that especially if they are divorced. Does your boyfriend have custody of her now? Since you know the ex legally can't take her, the ex would be considering kidnapping her. That would be a big no, no. It sounds like she is all mouth full of threats. She seems to be very jealous that her ex hubby has moved on with his life. Over time, hopefully, she will meet someone to share her life with and not be so nosy in yours. If the two of you really care about each other and you are willing to work together, then she won't win. Be sure to tell him to discuss this with his attorney just in case the ex does try to pull this stunt. You don't have to give in to this woman and your ex doesn't have to give up his relationship with you because of his ex's stupidity. If she does take her, he needs to let the authorities know. Yes, it's very hard on a child to experience this but she will know how much her daddy loves her. However, is the ex willing to get into that much trouble legally? You have to let your boyfriend decide what he wants to do because you don't want him to resent you in the long run. I'm sorry if I'm not much help but speaking with an attorney to get the legal answers sounds like the way. Prepare yourself with what your boyfriend decides. If he has fallen in love with you and wants his daughter and you in his life, he will make the right decisions and will prepare himself in case the worst happens. 

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