| You need to stand your ground. Don't allow your ex to control you which it sounds like he's trying to. He should feel guilty about his affairs. Don't feel sorry for him because he made his choices. No matter what you do, try to keep your head up high. Stand your ground with your children. Explain to your son that you are doing the best you can, you love him and provide for him so you would appreciate some respect. Don't threaten to send him to his father's that will plant the seed in his head and one day, he just might go. Keep your daughter in counseling and be sure to have the conversations documented. Because, if you happen to go back to court, you can use it in your favor. Think positive!! You have to try to force yourself out of your depression. This is easier said than done but do things that make you happy. His problem is he can't have his cake and eat it to so he wants to make you miserable. He isn't worth the energy. Consult your legal counsel about the house and custody of the children. Have them advise you on what you should do. Especially if he's showing up at the school and neighbors. Your ex is purposely trying to tear you down so you will give in to his demands. For your sake and the children's stand tall. Don't give in. If he argues with you, just tell him since it doesn't pertain to the children, you have nother further to say and go inside your home. My ex does similiar things to me. After 14 years of being under his thumb, I've have finally been able to tell him off here and there. I use to be afraid of him because of all his yelling and screaming. However, now that I am remarried, I don't have to listen to him rant and rave about petty issues other than the children. He tries to get at me by using the children and he is trying desperately to have my husband through in jail. Yet, we are smarter than him and know exactly what he is up too. It's all about mind games and the ex's seem to know exactly how to play them. Don't make any comments about him in front of your kids because the boy will resent it. Hold your tongue. Since you are experiencing depression and panic attacks, go to your doctor to see if he can prescribe you some medicine to help keep your nerves calm. Remember, your ex is trying to drive you crazy, so don't let him. Walk away from him when he starts yelling. He's the one that will look stupid, not you. No matter how much he tries to put you down especially in front of the kids, let the comments bounce off of you. He is narrow minded and you are not going to change his way of habits. You have to learn to accept him for what he really is---a jerk. I hope my advice has helped you. I know exactly what your going through because I've been there and am still there. Anytime, you want to vent, just do so. I will try to respond back as soon as I can. Your a strong woman and let your strengths shine!!!!! ↑ |
