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my doughter is over 13 years old and she cry's and begs me to not let her go to her Dad's house. she insured me that there is no any kind of abuse going on. she has spoken to him, but he always fights with her and tells her that she has no rights and she has to go to his place... how can I help my child without getting any lawers involved. ↓
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| Name: gina | Date: Aug 5th, 2005 2:11 AM |
| I would go for a free consultion with a laywer just to see what the say. ↑ |
| Name: B | Date: Aug 11th, 2005 1:51 AM |
| It is kind of difficult to say without having a foundation or background of your teenage daughter; in other words, how long have you been separated/divorced, and has the child spent significant time with her father? It is difficult being a single parent; do you think that she may have had too much liberty while being with you, and may be her father has different disciplinary standards that your daughter does not read from you, which is causing this behavior. This is all speculative until some fundamentals are disclosed. I would assess the situation between you and the child's father. It is very easy for other people to render their opinion, because in most cases, somebody hears a similar case and all of the sudden they think that their opinion on that "case" applies to all. I would also recommend a therapist. Good luck. ↑ |
| Name: april | Date: Nov 8th, 2005 2:55 PM |
| i went through the same thing lol that your child is going though when i was that age and its totally legal for her not to go to his house if she doesnt want to that is in the state of georgia just like at the age of 13 you are allowed to choose which parent you would like to live with and no matter what the parent says that you would be currently living with it is agianst the law for that parent in any form to stop you from doing so. anyways hope i helped sorry for rambleing and tell her to trust her heart and go with her first instinct not to say it wont hurt her fathers feelings if she doesnt go to see him but its her choice!!! best of wishes ↑ |
| Name: Ellen | Date: Mar 2nd, 2006 2:52 AM |
| You need lawyers now...they are expensive but do this for the sanity of your child. I was a kid forced to see my father and i hated it all the way there was no abuse...he just stirred up emotions making my sister cry my mom cry yelling at us like he had a right to. If your ex cared about your daughter, he would be on his knees begging her to still love him and let him be her daddy. Your 13 yr old should have the upper hand...get a lawyer... ↑ |
| Name: Agnes | Date: Mar 5th, 2006 11:07 PM |
| Check your state laws. In most states, children can begin making the choice about visitation beginning at some age between 12 and 14. Also, since you are her custodial parent, you can make decisions for her, that's why she "has no rights". I hope it all works out. ↑ |
| Name: Brette | Date: Jun 29th, 2006 7:32 AM |
| Legally, a 13 year old can decide if they want to abide by custody decisions made for them. if they do not wish to see one of their parents, they do not need to. ↑ |
| Name: Erika | Date: Jul 11th, 2006 4:25 AM |
YOUR CHILD CAN ABSOLUTELY MAKE HER OWN DESCISIONS!!! i am 16 years old but i have hated my dad since i was 14. my mom was very understanding and when i told her that i wanted to cut contact with him after he moved out she didn't like it but decided not to fight me. however, even if she had wanted me to contine having dinner with him once a week, i wouldn't have gone. you can not make a 300 puond girl go where she doesn't want to go. not saying your daughters fat, just to clear that up. dont make her go anymore!
hope this helps! ↑ |
| Name: pj754 | Date: Jul 11th, 2006 1:02 PM |
| I'm from Illinois and the judge is making my daughter visit with her dad. In the beginning of my divorce, I didn't let my children see their father because we had nothing legal in writing that stated he would ever bring them back home to me. Especially, when he treatened not too. However, the judge reprimanded me for taking away contact with their father and gave him more visitation time. 3 years later, my daughter still doesn't want to see her father but my lawyer says I have not choice but to make her go. She use to cry and have terrible belly aches when she was going for long weekends or more. Emotionally, he was screwing with her head. However, is figured out a way to get around it. She either makes plans to go to someone else's house or have other friends come to her dad's house. However, he's caught on to what she does but he allows it. As long as he allows it, this is how she copes. Unless there is reason to believe the child's environment may endanger seriously the physical, metal, moral and emotional health, you need to get her to a counselor/social worker so they can evaluate her situation with her father to find out why she doesn't want to be there. You have that right to take her. Explain that you are trying very hard to make her situation better but you need to have specifics in writing in order to do so. Although, I'm speaking from my case in Illinois. So, you will need to check your statues in the state you live in. Unfortunately, getting a lawyer to help your case may be the only answer. I'd hate for you to lose more time with your daughter to her dad. She does have rights but you have to find the right channels for her voice to be heard. I'm still working on my situation. Now, I am working on counseling for my children to help lesson his visitation time. I can only hope it works out. Good luck and I hope things will work out for you. ↑ |
| Name: Lisa | Date: Jul 13th, 2006 1:36 AM |
| Check with an attorney and see if she can make her own choice now,I think she can but double check anyway. Your ex knows she can too. ↑ |
| Name: Lynne n | Date: Jul 13th, 2006 7:19 PM |
I think taht she is old enough to know what she wants to do!
I have a friend with the same kind of thing,but their father is a nasty piece of work he pinned my mum up agaisnt a wall a few years ago and has hit the kids mother as well.
The kids used to go with him every weekend but now they have diecied that they dont want to see him anymore,i think they have found out what he is really like! ↑ |
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