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Name: girli_bird
[ Original Post ]
my husband and I have been married for 4 years. He has three children and I have one. For the most part things are pretty smooth now. At the start of our relationship the mother and her family talked really bad about me and my child even in front of the kids. They also alouded them to do it. As time went on the mother started to acept me and my child because of some of the things she went thru and some of the things i did for her, she even said sorry for the way she acted before. She even buys gifts for my child which is great. The problem now that even after 4 years, it seems that there are many times when my child gets left out of things. These are times like when the other 3 have spend a lot of tome with their mom or her family and then they come back home. they just wnat to play with each other or don't want her to play with the new things they have got. She gets left out when we go to my husbands brothers house. He has 4 kids too. My child always gets blamed for things( there has been times when she wasn't even there and she still got blamed) and gets left out of the playing. The aunt is also always taliking bad about my child. The other problem she has is when there is a group of freinds and her sibblings she tends to get left out, but not so much when her sibblings aren't around. My husband thinks it has something to do about her. I think that it is becuase is becuase she is considered the "step child" more so then the others, and for some reason it is seen as bas or not as good as the rest, so kids would rather play with the others kids then her. The other 3 learned that they got symathy when they talked bad about her and it seems that they do it alot. Is there any way to make this better for every one. just to let you know the oldest was 7 when we got together(his) and 4(mine) 4(his) and 2(his)
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Name: Lizzi | Date: Jan 16th, 2007 3:14 PM
I think your husband needs to sit down with his children and tell them enough is enough and they will either treat your daughter like she is their true sister or they will suffer consequences from it. Like say if they choose not to include her in thier playtime then they just won't get any playtime themselves,simple as that! 

Name: dragraught | Date: Jan 17th, 2007 1:56 AM
I think the same as Lizzi, except that I think both of you need to sit down and explain to the kids that they need to be considerate to your daughter. They need to include her in thier playtimes plus when you are at inlaws or other's homes, they need to include her. IF they do not then they should get disciplined and get things taken away. What I would do is explain how she must feel and ask them how they would feel if it were them getting left out or not being included in outings. 

Name: girli_bird | Date: Jan 17th, 2007 2:55 AM
WE do tell every one to play together, and when it is just us at our house then everything is pretty good. It is just when there are others around. I guess overall what I am asking is if because she is the only one with a diffrent last name and has no blood sibblings if that could be the reason why she has trouble being exsepted by other children. like if kids have choice of being friends with the real sibblings or the step child, they would chose the real sibblings. What do you think? 

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