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Name: Lisa
[ Original Post ]
My son is 14 and his best friend is 16 and just got his license.I told my son he was not to be riding around in the car with his friend just yet because he is a brand new driver and I'm not ready for that yet.My son said o.k. and I thought the matter was solved.Well,the friend lives nearby and as usual my son asked if he could go over and I said yes,but no riding in the car! My son said o.k. Well awhile later I call and there's no answer so I drive by and the car is gone!!!!! How should I handle this situation? My son for the most part is a good kid and usually does what he's told but now this has happened. I want to handle it in a mature manner so what do I do?
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Name: Rox | Date: Apr 28th, 2006 4:35 AM
First I would ask him if he went with him in his car. Give him a chance to tell the truth. Then tell him you saw the car was gone. It may be possible a parent or another friend drove.

If he did go with him and disobey you then ground him from hanging out with all of his friends for a couple weeks. Explain to him that he betrayed your trust and hurt you when you are trying to look out for his best interests. As you said hes a pretty good kid so he should understand. 

Name: Lisa | Date: Apr 29th, 2006 5:49 PM
Thank-you Rox,I did talk to my son and he told me the car was in the garage and thats why I didn't see it and that they were out in the backyard and thats why they didn't answer the phone when I called.It was just a scary feeling though you know? I don't think my son would lie to me because he really is a good kid. as a matter of fact,here's an example: He isn't allowed to run with his cousins because they tend to get into trouble ...alot. But one day when my son came home from a bike ride,he came to me and said,"mom,I stopped by my cousins house but only for a few minutes,I know I'm not supposed to but I saw them outside and was only there a few minutes,I just wanted you to know". But the point is he came to me and told me the truth!He could have never said a thing and I would have never known.He is honest and that's why I trust him and believe him about the car incident.I'm a lucky parent. 

Name: Rox | Date: May 1st, 2006 4:43 AM
Good news. Hope he stays that way. He does sound like a good kid.

I once told my mom that I was hanging out with friends that were smoking pot. Then she wouldn't let me hang out with them. That made me mad b/c I had showed her she could trust me and then she wouldn't let me be around them. That made me not want to tell her. I still did though. Just something else to keep in mind. 

Name: Lisa to Rox | Date: May 2nd, 2006 8:01 PM
Thanks Rox! I really am lucky to have a son like I got. Raising good kids relies heavily I think on being good parents so I guess I can give myself a pat on the back! I'm glad I only had one though,I wouldn't want to go through it all again,I feel lucky the one I do have is seemingly turning out o.k.! 

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