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Name: Shauna
[ Original Post ]
I'm 16 years old and 2 months pregnant. And the father denies ever sleeping with me. I'm very depressed though. I have at least 3-4 major breakdowns a week. It's so hard for me to find hope even though I know my family loves me and my friends are there for me, it's still hard for me to imagine raising this child without the father here. I think all of these awful thoughts that I can't tell anybody who knows who I am, not even the ones that are close to me. Sometimes I lay in bed from noon until I fall asleep thinking about how worthless I am, and all the probable reasons he left me. Such as, that I'm a whore, I deserve nothing in life, no man is ever going to want to be with me...before I became pregnant I had a bad reputation, I haven't really been out of the house lately so I don't even want to think about what people are saying now. I know that I shouldn't care about what other people think about me, but it's still hard especially at my age. Because I've had so much time to myself I've thought about things alot. And the reason for my promiscuity is because I wanted acceptance and love (a messed up way of thinking, but it's true) and what I got in return is the exact opposite. I've been used more times than a community bus, and it hurts so bad when I think of every guy I've given my heart, soul, and body to. But not many people understand that for young women and girls in my situation, the last thing you want to do is insult the person. That only creates lower self-esteem. It's a vicious cycle, a twisted merry-go-round and I want off.
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Name: terri | Date: Jan 13th, 2006 1:49 AM
Get a dna test, that way he wont be able to deny its his. 

Name: Shauna | Date: Jan 13th, 2006 11:57 AM
good news...sorta, I talked to him last night for the first time in a month. The way that I found out he denied sleeping with me is by my friend's fiance and her uncle. They work for the same company he does and they both see him every day. I didn't get much accomplished in the conversation but I feel better now that I talked to him personally. Basically he told me that he's confused, he doesn't think he's ready to be a dad...and he needs time to think about all this stuff. I told him I don't need him there, that I have plenty of people who care about me. Then I told him, "I just want you to think about that fact that one day this child is going to gorw up and start asking, 'Where's my daddy?' " I told him I'm trying my hardest and doing my best at preparing my life to bring a baby into it. But I really don't know if he'll stick around and do the same, he said some things that almost made me think he would. Something I left out....he's addicted to crack and meth. Something which I've never even seen in real life before. Sometimes though, in the rare cases, this can be a wake-up call to people. I don't know how well this would work for him, but he's already made an effort to call me on the phone, something I was never expecting him to do. 

Name: Shauna | Date: Jan 19th, 2006 11:41 PM
someone help, I'm starting to go through breakdowns again... 

Name: amy | Date: Jan 30th, 2006 10:40 AM
sorri 4 bein cheeky love but get real ok hes onli a boy just cus ur havin a baby does nat mean u wnt find anova man and u have plenty of time for dat ur onli 16. for now concentrate on ur baby stop talkin bout breakdowns u wudnt kno wat one is u need 2 fink of ppl worse off dan u n dat will make u feel bteer top kno fings cud be worse. everythimng will be ok and u will find love sumtime in ut=r life so just u fink about ur unborn child ok. 

Name: To shauna | Date: Jan 31st, 2006 8:25 PM
Hi there I was reading through this forum and came across your story. This is pretty major. Let me just say that I have a friend who became pregnant at 16 and the father of the baby denied it was his. She just let him know that he did have a baby but she didnt expect anything from him. He said that he wasnt ready to be a father (he was 20) and she said "oh and I am ready to be a mother...well I'm not but I'm going to do the best I can". I'm glad to hear that you are keeping the baby as only immature women wont but I'm sad to hear that the father doesnt want to be a part of the babys life. Maybe he will come around...just maybe... in the mean time you dont need him! If you have lots of family then look to them for support. Good luck and keep your chin up! 

Name: Shauna | Date: Feb 1st, 2006 10:03 PM
that's really weird, because he's 20 also, you basically just summed my whole story up...wow, odd. I am doing better now though. I keep telling myself that this baby needs a mommy more than I need a boyfriend. And that's been helping me move on alot. I'm not expecting him to come around anymore though, in fact my friend's fiance works with him and he told me that he (the father of the baby) had 2 girls and was hooking up with both of them in his hotel room a few nights ago. I think I should've been more upset by that, but it kinda helped me. 


Name: Tapinga | Date: Feb 3rd, 2006 1:40 AM
Hey I know what your feeling, I went though that stuff too. Its okey. Leah's dad, said the same thing, it was hell. I was made fun of everyday, just tell yourself that these people they don't know you, they don't have a clue of what is going inside of you. And you can rise this child. I'm doing it, I'm glad the father stays away, Idon't want leah to be like him, It real get better, trust me. I was just like you. My daoughter is my life, and it will take time to get true friends, but the wait is wroth it. I beleive everything happen for a reason. and it does. God picked you to have this child, he's ready for him or her to come out into this world. he picked you to be the mom, that because he knows you can do it, god never gives us more then we can handle.
Leah my daought is what brought god into my life, mybe he's trying to do it to you to. there so much I want to say, and I don't even know how to put it down. Just hang in there, I did and I'm glad I did to. 

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