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I am 20 years old.I was with my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years and we had just got recently engaged when I found out I was pregnant with twins. Things started going bad in the relationship so he wanted to break it off. He has started seeing someone else who lives about 5 hours away and says he is moving there. Which upsets me because I want him to be a part of kids life. especially boys because they need a father figure. He says he will do what he can but his main suggestion was to just come up once a week and see them for a few hours. I don't know if thats worth it. I know I can't tell him he can't see his kids but I just wish there was some way I could make him see he should be around to spend time with his kids and bath, feed, and wake up in the middle of the night with them. Anyone have any suggestions?! ↓
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| Name: Noel | Date: Aug 13th, 2006 9:41 PM |
Hello,
My husband just left me 6 1/2 months pregnant in June for another woman. I like you had thought the same thing, I need him to be a male role model for our son, he needs to be there to bath, feed and wake up with them in the middle of the night. I was devastated. I just could not believe that he would do that to us. Especially since he was the one that begged me to get pregnant for a year and wanted a son so badly. I wanted him to move back to the city that his daughter(his from a previous marriage), his future son and me were to help in raising them. I also couldn't understand how he would not want to be here to watch them grow up to be with some slut with no morals or values. I called and begged him to come and be with me, I groveled and I never used to do anything like that. Then, I started thinking about it. Why do I want someone who would abandon his wife, son and daughter for some girl. What kind of a person does that. Not someone with very high morals, values or regards anyones feeling, but his own. A very selfish person does that. And he is certinly not worthy of any kind of love that his son, his daughter or me would be willing to give him. Also, do you want someone with those kind of values hanging around your two sons rubbing off on them, only to make them into that same type of person to abandon their family when they get older. I would hope that you wouldn't. I'm not saying that I still don't get sad about what my husband did to me, and I'm not saying that I don't ever want him around, because I do to both of those. However, he doesn't sound like he cares and thats not the type of person you want to hang around your kids and rub off on them. God has a plan for all of us, look at Genesis 50:20 and Jeremiah 29:11 this helped me out a lot getting through this, good luck! ↑ |
| Name: gesika | Date: Aug 14th, 2006 2:19 AM |
Hi. I have a 2 1/2 year old girl and have been with her dad for about 6 years. I used to want to make him see that he needed to be in his daughter's life too. Unfortunatly you can't make him want to see his kids or be in his kids' lives no matter how badly you want him to want to. It will just get you upset. I think that you need to enjoy your babies because they grow up fast. The past 2 1/2 years went by so fast with my daughter. I think that if your ex calls you on the phone you could tell him about the babies and tell him what they are doing and just talk about them. Maybye you could also send him pictures of them if he doesn't get mad at you. That might make him miss them and want to spend time with them. I think that when the babies get older and want to know their dad that is when your ex will be getting hurt if he cares at all about being in his kid's lives. My b/f eventually got the idea that if he didn't start being in our daughter's life then when she gets older she might not know him and might not want him to be in her life. I hope things work out for you. Congrats and good luck on the pregnancy. : )
Jessica ↑ |
| Name: sally24 | Date: Aug 14th, 2006 5:32 PM |
| He wanted to break it off due to the fact he didn't want to settle down and take care of responsiblities you want that kind of father for your boys , twins is a big demand but one parent can be enough , and i am sure you have other family around to support you , my mom raised me and my brother and sister by herself my brother never had a male role model and he came out ten times better than half the men i have met in my life, my husband came from the same background and he is just as wonderfull. Your children are going to be hurt emotionally if this man shows up once a week when there older to be with them , i am sorry but he ethier needs to be involved or not involved when he walked away from you and those babies he chose allready not to be a father , I would just move on and focus on you and those wonderfull children , and you can still defiantly find a new man someday in your life who will treat you and your children far better , congrats on your pregnancy. ↑ |
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