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| Name: Joeys_Mam | Date: Dec 27th, 2008 8:47 PM |
| Mark wouldn't randomly buy me a present. But we do exchange gifts on our birthdays, our anniversary and at Christmas. I think it's important to exchange gifts, even small ones on important events, it shows you care. But he would never randomly buy me anything, like when I gave birth to our son, he didn't buy me anything, not even a bunch of grapes! He doesn't have it in him to buy me anything out of affection unless it's obvious that he should eg at Christmas. But to only have received 2 crappy gifts in 14 years is crazy imo! What about Christmas? On your anniversary? Your birthday? Mothers Day? Doesn't he buy you anything at all? Do you buy him gifts? Was he like this before you were married? Have you talked to him about how you feel? ↑ |
| Name: winnmom | Date: Dec 27th, 2008 9:06 PM |
| No I am not in that situation........but if money is tight, well then I can understand not being able to buy gifts. ↑ |
| Name: VonDoomsMom | Date: Dec 28th, 2008 12:37 AM |
| No...I have never gotten anything for no reason or for my birthday, anniversary, and I'm not his mom so why should he get me anything for mothers day(his reasoning..course he doesn't get his mom anything either I have to do it)...I don't even get to sleep in on Mothers day. He WILL buy stuff that he wants too and say its for me. Like he bought our digital camera and said it was for me...but it is always in his truck or garage if I want to take pics of the kids I have to put it back or get yelled at the next time he looks for it. So i don't consider it a gift. I do get him things, but I don't have a job so if I want to buy anything more than small stuff I have to tell him about it first. Big ticket items that I have gotten for him include a TIG welder, a set of rims, a Guiness beer tap and kegarator. Usually I will just coordinate everyone to chip in who is going to buy him something so he gets something good even if we have no money. He doesn't even do that for me...last year I got from his family, a scabble game, a book about fairies, some dumbass wall hanging about kitty cats!!! AM I 4??? at least this year they got me a set of sheets for the bed which I did need desperately. But that was me saying in a VERY loud voice at dinner one night a few weeks ago that I had a big hole in our only set of king size sheets. He has never been a big gift giver...I always just felt that I was being selfish if I got angry about it...I didn't even get a wedding ring or engagment ring or even a wedding.. we got married at the court house after living together for 5 years...we were supposed to have a wedding but he discouraged me from planning one, saying how it was a waste of money we didn't have. I agree with that but I still feel gyped. I don't want to be showered with gifts or anything, and I wholly understand our lack of money situation but I just don't know...i feel very taken for granted. and yes he knows exactly how I feel he just knows I would never leave him. ↑ |
| Name: winnmom | Date: Dec 28th, 2008 5:44 AM |
| o.k I certainly understand better....sorry I just have not been on much lately and am not up to speed.....lol...... hmm maybe he just does not know what to get? A palm pilot sounds like a very nice gift. well if he has not been much of a gift giver........and if you do the budgeting, you may just have to give him a bit of a shove........budget putting a bit of $$ away every pay day.....YES this will be tough, but just do it......then when your b-day or anything comes up, hand him the money with a list of gift ideas...........ooor.......special little gifts that cost no money.........yes sleeping in, breakfast made, a date night just the 2 of you, even if it is something like the 2 of you watching a movie with no kids....... other than that, at this moment I can not think of anything....I will continue to though, and post any thoughts or ideas I get........ also if you feel taken for granted, maybe you are?you need to talk about that to him! ↑ |
| Name: GoldiLocks | Date: Dec 28th, 2008 7:03 AM |
| Hey VonDoomsMom, try not to feel so peed off at him, some men just arent gift givers & have no clue what to get for their wives, he may be better at other things than the ones who do give gifts to their wives! if you guys are on a budget just talk to each other that twice a year, birthdays & Xmas you put aside acertain amount of money & buy each other 1 thing from the list of three you need/want! then its still a surprise & everyone is happy :-) just be happy, im sure your dh is a good man & im sure you love him & he loves you, he may need more than just a hint, good luck & cheer up :-) ↑ |
| Name: bmes | Date: Dec 29th, 2008 5:05 PM |
| if money is tight, hubby and I will not exchange gifts...but if we got a little cash kickin' around we will get eachother something. but my hubby does get me stuff outta the blue too. he's always been good at that. i got a big bouquet of flowers a couple weeks back cause he felt bad that he had to go to work when he was supposed to be off and I was sick and still had to look after the kids. :-) some guys just aren't the type to even think of doing things like that. it's usually not in their nature. i think most of the time though when my hubby does things like that, it because someone at work or something will suggest it....lol....i have a feeling i know who it is at his work too...cause he is just that type of guy. my hubby is just not that type. lol...so i think he gets a little help...ha ha... why don't you just talk to him? if it's a money thing...you can make things....my hubby made me coupons once... massage...make dinner of my choice...things like that. ↑ |
| Name: zoey9810 | Date: Dec 29th, 2008 6:26 PM |
| We do gifts, or at least a card, we like the whole sappy tell me how much you love me thing in cards and that is my favorite gift, but i dont remember him getting me any thing for mothers day last year, and when Tyler was born he didnt get me any thing either, but i cant give him too much crap over that seeing that he was flying hom from germany and was exhausted, but a little something would of been nice at least. I tend to think more about the gifts I give, him on the other hand I have to practically tell him EXACTLY what I want and where to get it, then its no fun when I open it up. When money is tight or we are trying to save we tell eachother, so its well known in advanced. But we ALWAYS do the card thing. This year he got one from me, but I haven't gotten one from him yet because he broke his wrist and is in a cast up to his shoulder and cant write and he didnt want some one else doing it for him, so i hope hes figured out a way by now. but I do think its odd that you guys dont do the whole gift giving thing, what about the kids do they get gifts normally when the money isnt tight?? This year one of my gifts was a bootleg Army wives season 1 &2 I am still alittle pissed that he didnt buy the real thing because this is crap quaility! All men are different in the things that they do and dont do! And every realtionship is different ↑ |
