| Name: Sandy the mum | Date: Jul 14th, 2006 5:55 AM |
| divorce that asshole,. that's all i could say! ↑ |
| Name: Jannine | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 8:51 AM |
April,
I really needed to see your post today. Seriously, my second husband has been a true JERK lately. He used up my life savings (over $40,000) has left me in debt, filing bankruptcy due to his disability (after he gave his FIRST wife the house) and had the nerve at our bankrupcy appointment this week to tell our lawyer that he wanted our settlement to say that we (aka I ) would pay installments over 5 years to cover the joint debt rather then the trustee being allowed to take any disability settlement he was entitled to (he's appealing with SSI disability) because (get this) that is HIS money. He got so agitated that the lawyer walked out of her office refusing to deal with him. So now I may have to pay off this debt for the next five years by myself.
In addtion, he gives me a hassle about any small thing (laundry, cleaning etc) that has to be done. He want to be taken care of. And I think I may have reached my brink.
Sorry but I just needed to vent. I hope it's ok. Thanks. Jannine ↑ |
| Name: nicole jones | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 6:03 PM |
| Was you husband disabled before or after you married him Jannine? ↑ |
| Name: Jannine | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 7:08 PM |
Nicole,
My husband had MS when we met but was working. I can handle the fact that he is disabled (my Dad has CP and I have some muscle problems) but the "poor me" has to stop. Also, he has gotten worse lately with blaming me for virtually everything. If the house is messy, it's because I'm not a good enough wife. He's lost a lot of weight and says it's because, even though we have a fridge, pantry, and chest freezer full of food, and even though I cook meals to be reheated during the week he misses eating out and is therefore down to 140 lbs at 6 foot tall since my food is "crap". If we're short financially, it's my fault since he's had nothing but bad luck since he's met me. And, while he's not abusive towards or in front of my son, he has been know to threaten me in private. He knows that I will not take this but the fact that he threatens makes me honestly resent him. Yes, I understand disability. That does not give you the right to degrade someone. I am not "it", my name is not Pandora. Yes, his illness is a tragedy but we have it better than many, and I've stood by him when others may not have and do my level best to provide for the family. He feels that I owe him some kind of lifestyle. We've been married 1 year, together 4 and have had sex twice in those 4 years. I expect precious little from this man. And yes, he is VERY good with my son. But is it so much to ask for a little respect from my husband? Maybe even a litte appreciation once in while? (and for the record I do thank him for all he does and have NEVER once degraded him for being disabled, impotent, or at home with my son) - sorry for venting (again) - Jannine ↑ |
| Name: tacomacat | Date: Jul 25th, 2006 11:48 AM |
My last husband was just like some of the jerks I am reading about here. Now picture this......
He is active duty army. He goes on trips a lot...I mean a lot! So much that there would be another trip notice on our answering machine when I got back from the airport from picking him up from a trip!
He is gone 3/4 of the year normally. I was employed before I met him. I got a better job making 13,662 a year. We have a baby. I pay for daycare and bring home, net, after taxes and daycare, a little more than $1 an hour. It is a full time job.
Our food budget is $100 a month. That must cover food, cat litter, and toiletries.
We get in an arguement and he tells me that I don't do anything, and that in my job all I do is sit around and type! And here I am, a virtual single mother, paying the bills, running the budget, taking care of the baby, working full time FOR $1 AN HOUR. And if it wasn't for that $1 stupid dollar an hour, we wouldn't be able to EAT or pay car insurance!
After 19 years and 7 months of this kind of treatment, I divorced his lazy you know what.
Now I got a man who helps me mow the lawn, clean the house (I can't believe it, I was so used to doing EVERYTHING myself because my last husband traveled so much). He appreciates my energy and do it yourselfness, I just appreciate it he is so willing to help.
There are men out there like my Stephen. Not all of them are lazy you know whats. ↑ |
| Name: Erika L | Date: Jul 25th, 2006 12:26 PM |
| Hi. You're not alone, sister. My husband gets up at 5:30am and starts rattling around as though he's single. He wakes the baby on his way out and guess who gets to take care of her instead of sleeping another half hour? Yup. And I work my butt off at home. But by the time childcare arrives I'm shot for the day. When I ask him to be more quiet he doesn't say anything. He just sighs and pouts as though I'm the reason he has no fun in his life. Speaking of, it's been a year since we had our baby and though my husband loves our daughter he hates his new life and can't seem to get a handle on the notion that he can't spend like he used to, do whatever he wants, and be all about him. It really sucks and is making home life so much less enjoyable than it could be. ↑ |
| Name: JAMIE | Date: Jul 25th, 2006 12:52 PM |
| HERE IT GOES.... I AM 28 WEEKS PREGNANT I WORK AWAY FROM HOME M~F 8AM TO 4:30 PM THEN I WHEN I GET HOME I AM BUSY WITH MY EBAY STORE AND TAKING CARE OF MY 3 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER AND MY ONE YEAR OLD SON. I ALSO CLEAN THE HOUSE DAILY TO COME HOME AND FIND IT A TOTAL MESS AGAIN. MY HUSBAND WAS INJURED ABOUT 4 YEARS AGO IN A WORK RELATED ACCIDENT SO HE STAYS HOME AND WATCHES OUR KIDS. HE DOESN'T GET THEM DRESSED OR BRUSH THERE HAIR OR TEETH I DO WHEN I GET HOME. HE GETS NO INCOME AND HAS THE NERVE TO CALL ME LAZY, TALK ABOUT ASSHOLE. I CAN'T EVEN TAKE MATERNITY LEAVE UNTIL A WEEK BEFORE I AM DUE SO WE HAVE ENOUGH IN SAVINGS TO COVER THE 12 WEEKS AFTER THE BABY IS BORN. I GET IN TROUBLE FROM HIM WHEN I BUY MY KIDS NICE NAME BRAND CLOTHING FROM GAP OR GYMBOREE. WHEN I AM TIRED AND FALL ASLEEP RIGHT AFTER THE KIDS DO HE GETS MAD AND SLEEPS ON THE COUCH BECAUSE I DIDN'T PUT OUT. I AM JUST GETTING SICK OF IT ANYONE HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS? I NEVER HAVE ANY TIME TO MYSELF EVER NOT TO MENTION EVERY FIRDAY I HAVE TO TAKE OFF WORK EARLY TO DRIVE HIM 1HR TO A DOCTORS APPT SINCE WE ONLY HAVE ONE CAR. ↑ |
| Name: Rebeca | Date: Jul 26th, 2006 3:25 AM |
| I know what ur talking about my husband dose the same. well he wont wake up our son but he will wake me up. and want me to be up with him tell he falls asleep. or to make him something to eat. I work a graveyard shift and have to sleep during the day. and yes at times my house is not up to par. but when i get the energy to do clean it. but i get so tired. Like at time i don't get sleep for a long time because when i get home from work my son will wont to play and my husband will be asleep and wont wake up. (he is getting better @ waking up and being with him so i can sleep an hour or 2) so i don't get sleep tell like 4or 6 hours before i have to go back in. so i under stand how you feel. It is very had dealing with my husband because I'm still at the stage where i cant be mad at him for to long. like i for get or he gives me bad looks and i just wont care any more. ↑ |
| Name: Hiddy | Date: Oct 13th, 2006 11:34 PM |
It's MEN I tell ya!
I have a four year old daughter, my husband is convinced his job is so much important and so much harder than being a stay at home mum. When he is home he sighs about every little thing I ask him to do.
He has these chores -
1. Feed the dog (only at night)
2. Take out the garbage and the recycling
3. Make sure the upstairs sliding door is locked when he goes
to work
4. Take the toddler seat out of his car after the weekend
He forgets to do the above mentioned jobs and I am constantly reminding him of what they are. He never does any dishes, he doesnt vaccuum, he rarely baths our daughter, he does NO cleaning. When I need a break from our daughter he acts like he is doing both my daughter and I some great big favor, instead of acting like her father and WANTING to be with her.
He constantly thinks about work, bringing it home with him at night and on the weekends. It feels like he isnt even mentally here most the time. He also does stupid little things that are so easy to rectify. Like eats without a plate and drops crumbs everywhere, he procrastinates about anything to do at home, like mowing 10 square meters of grass. He goes on and on about it for weeks before he finally gets up and does it.
IM SO SICK OF IT! At the moment its Saturday and Ive had my daughter all week. He said he was going out to do the shopping and guess where he is???? Thats right- in bed asleep. (Its nearly 1.30pm)
I do everything for him but wipe his butt!!!!!!
Anyone got the other half just like this one?!?!? ↑ |
| Name: Lizzi | Date: Oct 15th, 2006 6:36 PM |
| My husband goes to work and thinks that's all he has to do. Our son does the yardwork and if anything needs fixing,it just stays broken. My hubby works,comes home and eats then hits the couch for a long nap,gets up,showers starts drinking til late night hours,eats again and goes to bed. Same routine over and over again. Go figure! ↑ |
| Name: manda | Date: Oct 26th, 2006 6:56 PM |
| Well stephanie my husband has never said anything to me like that yet as i haven't yet returned to work as my sons only 5 weeks old. but what he does do to that drives me nuts is, when he returns from work i like to load of f baby on him for a bit so i get a little me time say to have a bath of sumthing, rather than entertain the baby he'll sit on the floor lean the baby against him and play on his play station leaving the baby to sqwauk with bordem forces me to return and look after im myself then as the stupidity to say, he hungry or sumin after being told a thousand time that he needs entertaining, some men are so bloody lazy and pig ignorant its unreal!! ↑ |
| Name: angelmama | Date: Nov 18th, 2006 9:41 AM |
Oh, Sweetie...
My husband said so much worse. That's why I'm not married to him anymore!!!!
How old is your little one? My baby was just a little over one when I left my husband.
It didn't work in my case, but you could try checking the phone book for A.A.
Assholes Anonymous..... ↑ |
| Name: shanak10 | Date: Nov 24th, 2006 9:53 AM |
Hi Stepanie,
We all have out moments with our spouses. We are two different genders and think differently. I will not accept such behavoir from my spouse but then again he would never do something like that. I think your husband needs to learn. did u ever try therapy?
shoshana at katzshana@gmail.com ↑ |
| Name: JESSE | Date: Nov 25th, 2006 2:02 AM |
| My asshole fiance dragged me out of his office tonight when I stood up for myself because I don't like the way he talks to me. It seriously looked like a scene from the movie Casino when Sharon Stone got thrown out on her ass. Men suck and I never want to be bothered with then again. I should have stuck to my previous rule that they are only good for dinner and drinks and then move on to the next one. ↑ |
| Name: JESSE | Date: Nov 25th, 2006 2:03 AM |
| One more thing. I pray that our son doesn't grow up to be like him. ↑ |
| Name: Maisy | Date: Nov 26th, 2006 8:10 PM |
| One time when I was talking to my husband, I guess i swore, well....He said that if I swore again he was going to hit me! So I said that he was not going to **%#@* bit me !!!! Silly man. ↑ |
| Name: Maisy | Date: Nov 26th, 2006 8:10 PM |
| One time when I was talking to my husband, I guess i swore, well....He said that if I swore again he was going to hit me! So I said that he was not going to **%#@* hit me !!!! Silly man. ↑ |
| Name: jodibates | Date: Mar 7th, 2007 10:45 PM |
| You think YOUR husbands an asshole.....I think mine takes the cake!! Top this story...so not ony does he go out with his friends and gets drunk and doesnt come home at night (mind you, we have a 3 month old collicky son so I am up with him all day being fussy and fidgitty) He just booked a trip to Florida for a week with his friends and leaves me home with the baby..He says he's burnt out and needs to unwind!! HE NEEDS TO UNWIND!!! IM the one who wakes up EVERY MORNING with the baby!! IM the one who gets up every two hours at night to feed him.. He NEVER LOOSES sleep EVER!! He has his own business and hasnt had work for two weeks, so there is no excuse for him!! I NEED THE FRIGGING VACATION to wind down!! UGH!!!!!!!!!! I f'ing hate him and when he comes back all his s*it is going to be in boxes!!!! ↑ |
| Name: gretaga | Date: Mar 19th, 2007 2:16 PM |
| My husband has never said anything to me like this. But i think you should either get a counselor for you and your husband, or you should talk to him about it during the day or when he is in a good mood. If that doesn't work, then i hope you get some other good advice because i feel wicked bad for you right now. ↑ |
| Name: Jocelyn | Date: Mar 22nd, 2007 10:52 PM |
| Oh my gosh yes, my husband is exactly like this. Because I work a desk job and he is a "blue collar" worker and works physically hard, he believes that gives him leeway to do NOTHING at home. My job is emotionally draining (I'm an adoption social worker) and difficult. But he doesn't get that. I am in a pretty miserable marriage to be honest. Thank goodness for my 2 year old son, he is the light of my life. I feel like I deserve so much more than I get from my husband. I mean I am a good person, I just don't know why I am stuck with such a loser. And I am stuck, I have tried leaving, but I just couldn't deal. It's like when we were separated all I wanted was to be back together, and here we are back together and it's the same thing all over again. Yeah we've tried marriage counseling, but he wasn't really into it. I give and give and give and he takes and takes and takes. I just can't leave because my son deserves to have a good standard of living, and we would really struggle (even with child support) if we left. Wow I'm really glad I just found this forum. None of my friends seem to have any problems like this. ↑ |
| Name: bbygrl1079 | Date: Mar 23rd, 2007 2:02 AM |
| okay i can definitely feel that i just got home from work; my husband has been laid off so he now does basicly nothing except watch our kids 4 nights a week and the dishes maybe three nights a week' anyhow i get off at midnight and i have to wake up and get our 7 year old off to school at 6:00AM and right now i wam so pissed because i got in the door and he picks a fight so he can have some lame excuse to go to the bar. okay fn asshole like i feel like taking care of a toddler when i get home just because he wants to keep the baby up late. poor fn baby he gets all his fn bills paid and acts like he needs a drink i thought when he was working all i did all day was "just take care of kids" and now he wants a fn metal and a damn beer f**k that why on earth did i marry such a little fn baby what a fn idiot i'm hot if i were him i'd be a little more worried about how i treat my wife imean why sdo they have to be such assholes but when they want shit their way all of a sudden they pitch a little cry baby bitch fit. WHO EVER READ THIS THANKS FOR "LISTENING" TO MY RANT , I FEEL MUCH BETTER NOW --THE FED UP HOUSEWIFE ↑ |
| Name: angel of mine 2006 | Date: Mar 26th, 2007 5:02 PM |
| Hey guys thank you so much for keeping this thread alive! Wow you know not to gripe but us women DO have it hard. I hope everyone feels better after getting stuff off their chest ↑ |
| Name: pattilynn35 | Date: Apr 4th, 2007 9:37 PM |
| I have been seperated for almost a year and just recently filed for divorce. I have nothing great to say about husbands these days. I can consider him to be self centered and quite an asshole. He only thinks of himself. He will be lonely for probably the rest of his life! ↑ |
| Name: T-rabbit | Date: Apr 5th, 2007 12:02 AM |
| My husband is going to Cuba for a year in June!! This sucks! I could deploy with him but then the kids would be at his moms for a whole year. I am staying here to take care of the babies!! WE both work in the same MOS in the army and he still acts like he does more than I do. It is a guy thing!! They got to feel important a swift kick in the hind quarters will get them in check. ↑ |
| Name: judy | Date: Jun 16th, 2007 7:47 PM |
my husband is such a asshole yesterday i took the car to blockbuster while he was sleeping for 20 min. and he had a yelling fit .Mind you its a rented car. Its now tomorrow and hes still pissed. Also hes now got his drunk on and is calling everyone what losers they are.Calling me names in front of the kids. What a dick ! THE KICKER IS HES HUSBAND #2
+ ↑ |
| Name: veri | Date: Jun 17th, 2007 11:53 AM |
Reading all your comments I see I never had a husband, I was married 5 years and he never did stuff like this.
He will hit me while I'm washing the dishes because he said I don't know how to do them, HE will stop me going to the kitchen cause he said I don't know how to cook, He will never received a cup of tea from my hand cause he said , -no, thank you- and put a disgusted face. He will complanning if I cook cause I used the food from the refrigerator.
I thougth it was just his character, he will DO my laundry!!! attention HE WILL put my clothes - that suppost not go to the dryer will put them on the dryer machine, and some other clothes will ruin them all.
He will cook, and ask me not to take too much from his food,
When we were going out we will do some shopping, then when we got married I ask about the bills, he will say its ok to do some shopping, buy this, buy that, get things for me for the house, for the refrigator etc etc, then ( oviously spending my own money , money that I work for) He will ask me to buy many things until I have my pocket empty, then askme to pay the rent and If i said I don't have the money he will kick me out of the house ( when I dont have place to go ) and he knew this.
so what was that? a husband????? I can't even call my exhusband. I said my ex nigthmare.
He will squizz my neck while we are wachting a movie, he was hughing me and then suddenly for no reason will squizz my neck or chocke me and, I wont know what is really happen? then he apologized. - he said--- I was checking---- checking what? how to killme??? he did this many times,
I'm not trying to get in your competition who is the worst husband , I just realize I didnt have a husband when I thougth so.( just because he sign a paper on court I thougth was enough to call him HUSBAND) and tellme pretty things when I need it, he wasnt a husband.
so see if you are complaning for your husband is fixable, then stop complanning and try to fix it, or just don't waste your time with someone that who doesnt love you, cause at the end you will be more hurt that you are now allready.
One time after we went to the store to buy some grocceries he put me in the floor from the back with his knee in my back ( suddenly we werent fighting and squizz my arms , such I didnt feel pain, but next day I saw my arms in the mirror were totally green and blue ( what happen? I Dont know )
so this stuff when werent fighting, do you want to know what he did to me while we were fighting?????
better stop here.
my great news to you I don't know where he is, and I dont see him 5 months!!! so thats a great progress. ↑ |
| Name: steve | Date: Jun 18th, 2007 12:53 AM |
| your all great dont get mad just let it ride. ↑ |
| Name: cathy | Date: Jun 22nd, 2007 3:00 PM |
husband keep gettin made at me but dont want o talk about it but just want to have intimacy and wakes me up early in the morning make love he will out of the blue just start grindin on me what should i do ? and why is he doing this ? he gets mad for the little stupid things and will not even tell me why he just want to make love
he gets mad for stupid reason say for example if he cooks something and i dont want to try it he gets mad . and i could be pregnant right now he refuses to wear condoms
sometimes if i dont give it to him the way he wants it he will withhold it from me
he could be mad at me too because i dont know how to ride him ↑ |
| Name: half assforever | Date: Jun 25th, 2007 10:38 PM |
| everything i do is wrong I am so stupid and unable to care for my children i don't want to be with this person anymore ↑ |
| Name: girli_bird | Date: Jun 27th, 2007 10:52 AM |
| I go to school monday-friday. I have to leave by 5:30 or 6:30 am, depending on what day it is and don't get home now until 4 at night. Then I work on weekends as an nurses aide. I am almost always the first one to get up and the last one in bed at night. My house is always a pit no matter how much I clean and get the kids to clean it always ends up messy. I don't middle doing the inside work if he would do the outside work like we had agreed, but our yard looks pretty crappy and we live in a neiborhood where all the yards look nice. And in side he could atleast rinse his dishes off instead of leaving dirty dishes all over the place, and he could put his dirty clothes in a basket instaed of stuffing them in the couch or throwing them on the floor where they get kicked undr the bed and I have to search for them. Maybe all this wouldn't bother me if he wouldn't say such mean things such as "you are lazy" "get your a** out of bed you lazy bit*h" ( when the kids were still in school and I got out early i would take a nap before they got home, and he always would come home to catch me sleeping) when I ask him to do something he say"yup just jump on my back" while leaning over and patting his back implying that he does everytying and has to carry me along. He makes more money than me and always tells me this oh about one daily. he says things like do I have boobs, when I ask him to do something. Besides the house work issues he makes fun of me infront of others. He is very out going and I am very shy so it is nothing for him to make fun of me and have everyone looking at me even though he knows that I hate it. ↑ |
| Name: JESSE | Date: Jun 27th, 2007 9:43 PM |
| Men are assholes. They never think we do anything. They don't think that raising a child is work either or running a housefold. It is not considered a job and they have no clue how much work it really is. I would love to see a man go through we do and be expected to "earn their keep" as mine has implied. Hell it's a job just to put up with them sometimes. Where is my hazard pay for that? ↑ |
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