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Name: ELAINE

[ Original Post ]

I'm 29 and i've been with my husband since i was 16 and life seems to get much harder for me with him. He doesn't underdstand me and he controlls my life and i need to talk to some one. I have a 11 yr old a son and a baby on the way. And since i got peragenet i've been more tired. A regular day for me is getting up in the moring making sure my son has his school cloths and then get ready to go to work and then go home and cook and clean and help my sone with his home work. And my husband he just comes home and does what he wants and go to the gym. He tell me first i was tired from working now all of the sodin your tired because your P.G. he watches what i eat i feel embarressed in front of him i feel like im not good enough for him. I go no where and none of my family visits me i don't talk to any one. Unless it's with his family but most of his family are very noise and it cause problems for me. Ya i know i'm 29 but my mind is still young i just don't no what to do i've tried so hard to talk to him and he doesn't listen. It seems like are relationship is in my hands because if i where to tell him that i don't think we should be together he'd be like ok and that's it. So maybe some when can help me out. ↓

Name: ELAINE | Date: May 31st, 2006 9:07 PM

nonw ↑

Name: Lizzi | Date: May 31st, 2006 11:06 PM

If your family would be willing to help you out and give you and your kids a place to call home with them awhile or set you up in your own place somewhere else,I would get out. Your husband seems to have a life of his own going on that doesn't include you much anyway so why stay? He likes the control hes got over you and the thought of you being broke down to the way he wants you to be is pleasurable to him.I know you have been together a long time but I bet it's more habit than love now.You say yourself if you told him you shouldn't be together anymore he would say ok and that's it. Doesn't that right there tell you something?At 29 you are still very young.Get away from someone who doesn't value you and look for someone who will.You deserve so much better and I think in your heart you know that. I wish you luck and future happiness! ↑

Name: Elaine | Date: May 31st, 2006 11:40 PM

Lizzi my family isn't not there for me nethier my brother are in jail and my sisters have there own life and for my mom we don't talk so im pretty much on my own. I love my husband very much but i just don't understand him he 34 he's very hansom and a very hard work but towards his wife it takes alot for him to give in. He's that macho type of guy i don't want to give up but i can't do it alone ethir. It's so hard for me no onew really knows what i feel. As a child i had a really bad life my gave me away and abused as well it's just so hard :( ↑

Name: Lizzi | Date: Jun 1st, 2006 1:49 AM

Hi Elaine! What if you sit down with your husband and just tell him what's on your mind and how you feel? Would he listen to you at least? If not and you know things won't get better,there are places that will rent to you based on your income. Check with your local housing authority.But if it's any consolation,I don't have the greatest marriage either.Hope yours improves soon,talk to your husband and try to convince him of how you need your marriage to change. ↑

Name: Fiona | Date: Jun 2nd, 2006 12:03 PM

He may be suffering from Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Do a Google search on this disorder and see if he fits the criteria.

A lot of bullies and control freaks suffer from this disorder and it's more common than people realise.

Let me know what you think after doing some searches. ↑

Name: ELAINE | Date: Jun 2nd, 2006 2:48 PM

IT'S JUST SO HARD TO TALK TO HIM. I LOVE HIM VERY MUCH BUT I FEEL LIKE IM IN THIS WORLD ALONE. LIKE NOE THAT IM P.G I WILL BE GFAINING WIEGHT AND HE ALREADY COMPLAINE ABOUT IT HE'S NOT SUPPORTIVE AT ALL WHEN I NEED HIM TO BE. IF HE NEW HOW MUCH I WEIGH O MAN HE'D BE VERY UPSET.HE ALREADY SAYS IM FAT. I USE TO BE SO THIN BUT JUST OUT OF NO WHERE I STARTING TO BE SO DEPRESSED AND I WAS GIVEN PROZAC AND THAT MADE ME GAIN LOST OF WEIGH AND I WAS TAKING OTHER MEDCATION FOR MY HEADACHES AT THE TIME AS WELL. MOST OF THE TIME I FEEL SO ALONE LIKE NOW. YOU NO ON THE OUT SIDE IM A WOMAN BUT ON THE INSIDE I FEEL LIKE A LITTLE GIRL CRYING FOR HELP BUT NO ONE HERE'S ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :( ↑

Name: Julia | Date: Jun 6th, 2006 6:13 AM

Elaine-
Hon, you're not alone in this world, hang in there and try to relax, it is not healthy to be this upset when pregnant!! You're a beautiful, compassionate, and caring human being, do not forget that! During the remaining duration of your pregnancy, try not to let your husband upset or stress you out. Just focus on your baby and get through the delivery and then reevaluate your situation with your husband. Stay strong and think POSITIVE for your baby's sake. Hang in there ok. If you want to talk even though I am a complete stranger, haha, I am here to chat. Just let me know and I will give you my contact info... ↑