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Name: Heather mother of 3
[ Original Post ]
I am at the end of my wits with this. He has been taking things compulsivly since he was 5yr. old he is now 11. The behavior stopped about a year ago after he stole something from a Kohl's department store and I took him back and made him return this to the Head officer over loss prevention (big buff man very intimidating) and thought that would be the end of it. I mean he has taken things from school, home, and family. Here recently he started his behavior of stealing things and lying.....I feel like if his lips are moving he is lying...(sad but true). He recently took a letter opener from his grandparents house after just getting into trouble for lying about something else. We decided to take everything out of his room the only items left are his bed, blanket, pillow, and dresser with clothes. He will be able to earn the items back one at a time each week as he continues to tell the truth and not steal. He is doing chores for my dad to earn twice the cost of the letter opener so that he will see how hard it is to work for the item and then the extra amount he will take down to donate to charity. At this point I do not know whatelse to do if this does not work I will have to take drastic measures...He has already been in 2 in-patient treatment centers and 1 out-patient treatment center in the course of 6-yrs. he has been diagnosed with adhd/bi-polar/odd he is on 20 mg of Adderall xr and takes a total of 75mg of Seroquel a day.....I feel like at times that I am the only parent in our small town that has these issues. That is the other thing because I do live in such a small town everybody knows everybody and I feel like at times that people don't want to associate themselves with me because of my sons behavior. My biggest challenge is that he has 2 other brothers 8&9 that also are adhd/add odd children and this is a big influence for them. My child is not very hyper as the medication is doing it's job, but more compulsive.....any parents having the same problem?
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Name: Heather mother of 3 | Date: Aug 1st, 2006 6:09 AM
My fear is that he is under 18 and legally I am responsible. I am afraid that he will end up costing me a substantial amount of money that I will not be able to afford. I am a full-time student and my husband is the sole supporter. 

Name: tattybabe | Date: Aug 2nd, 2006 9:00 PM
hi there i have big problems with my son lying and stealing and being violent i;m also at my wits end as he never listens to a word any1 says and no 1 seems to want 2 help us 

Name: Bear | Date: Aug 2nd, 2006 11:49 PM
I think you need to make sure he is punished, and that the punishment is appropriate and tough. I used to be the same way, I shoplifted and stole from peoples houses, but I stopped when the big trouble started. (like being caught by the cops and spending a night in the cells, scary for a 13 year old)
Then when I was properly medicated, I started selling my Ritalin to the druggies who hung out near my school. That only stopped when a Youth Judge told me that if I ever got caught for anything again, I would be put in a detention centre.

My advice, as meagre as it is, is not to shield him from the consequences. If you cover stuff up to avoid the shame, which is a very understandable thing to do, it doesnt teach him not to do wrong. 

Name: chanderlier3 | Date: Aug 19th, 2006 10:48 PM
hello. i am a mom of 2 teens. my son is 15 yrs old, and he has had this since he was 8 yrs old or longer. We are going through the stage aof the same thing, and now my daughter has started the same thing and she is 13 yrs. we have found evidence in the room of his when he saids he did take anything. and we know he has been lying. it gets worse before better. it has gotten to the point at our home of locking all the cupboards and fridge, freezer at nights.
Alixander is taking focalix xr 20 mg in am, and 5 at afternoons but i don't thinkmit is helping so i am having him see a female dr and maybe he can open up better, we even had an ekg, and an eeg done.found out his brainwaves aren't connected all the way, and he hears part of what we say, also due to grades, he is partally retarted
please, have him checked out by all the drs you can think of, and just try to keep cool, and have self control, and let him know you love him, but not what he does. it is wrong, just reassure your son you all love him and stand by him.
not much you can do, we even had thew cops called on alix for stealing money, but were told being under 16 yrs nothing they can do.
i don't kno how much this has helped but good luck. 

Name: ks98 | Date: Feb 16th, 2011 9:12 AM
I'm not sure when you submitted this but I've been having the same problems for 5 years now. My son is 11 and his behavior has not stopped for even a day this whole time. The Dr said he does not have ADD or ADHD. The counselor said he doesn't know why he does what he does and that if he has to label him he'll just call it oppositional defiance disorder. The teachers and the school counselors have literally told me "I don't know what to tell you." He is terrible to be around and awful to take anywhere. Lying comes so naturally to him. I also have 3 other children. We had a locksmith put a lock on one of my daughter's door and my 4 year old recently showed me a 'secret' area on her shelf where she can hide things so he wont steal them from her. If I had the money he'd be in military school but it is extremely expensive. I have no local relatives and the distant ones I have are just that. Distant. I've talked to juvenile hall and they can't do anything unless the courts are involved. I've bought books and talked to other parents but I can't find any help at all. I'm so tired of him doing this to my family. 

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