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Name: In Search of Sanity
[ Original Post ]
My 6 yr old son was diagnosed in Jan of 06 with ADHD and is on Concerta 27mg and recently was upped to 100mg of Zoloft for his anger, although things have gotten much better than they were, I am at a loss for what to do when these temper tantrums come on. I can never discipline without a MAJOR crying fit and then I feel this HORRIBLE guilt for having punished... did I over react.. should I have just let that one go? Would I have punished my 4 yr old for the same thing? And my husband is of no help, when I finally lose patience and need a time out, I look to him to come in and be the soft spoken one but he NEVER does, I know he works all day and is tired when he gets home, but come on .... you cant hold it together for 5 minutes???? I seriously think I need to get on something to help my depression... I cant stop crying.... HELP!
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Name: toirichmom | Date: Jul 14th, 2006 2:40 AM
I can fully understand what you are going through. i have a son that is 9 with ADHD. I actually went to see a therapist myself and taking antidepressants myself. I was crying all the time. Very sad all the time and was to the point where I couldn't function at all. I am much better now. I also take my son weekly to see a behavior counselor. This has helped tremendously. I don't know how bad the tantrums get but my son used to have them too. I went to parenting classes for parents of ADHD children to help with that. You might want to look in to those. You gotta take care of yourself first though. If Mama ain't happy, no one's happy. IF you wanna chat more, let me know!! 

Name: In Search of Sanity | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 4:43 AM
Well, we are at it again, we went out to dinner tonight and I let him have Dr. Pepper as a treat because I just said to hiim how well he has been handling his rage and emotions...and I think it will never happen again, I put my kids to bed at 9pm and said they could watch thier video nows for a little and my son is still UP and it is after midnight..the sugar obviously got to him. I am crying and cyring cuz I just dont know what to do...I have asked him a milion times if he is restless to just please be quiet but he is up playing toys, catching his shadow on the wall, playing with a stuffed baseball... so now I can not sleep either!!!! "Toirichmom", I would LOVE to talk on a regular basis ifyou are interested... I need a friend who understands this soooooo BADLY!!!! I think part of my depression is that I feel so alone!!! Please contact me again~or anyone else too that would like to chat. 

Name: toirichmom | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 3:11 PM
We can definitely keep chatting. I also need a friend that can understand what I go through also. I have some information that might help you with your son. I didsome research about diets for kids with ADHD. Here are a few things that they shouldn't and should have. Anything with high fructose corn syrup... basicly all drinks except for water and juice. Also give him Omega 3 vitamins. Most kids with ADHD are missing that fatty acid in their bodies. That will hlp him out alot too. As far as his behavior, are you pretty stern with him or are you passive? The reason I ask is because he, like most children, may already know how to push your buttons. You can not ASK him to do anything, you tell him. He has to learn that you make all the decisions, not him. It is funny because I remember when my son was 4 and I todl him no about something and he was mad and going back and forth about my answer. I was thinking to myself, " I am actually arguing with a 4 years old??! What the heck!! I am the grown up here and he shouldn't be questioning my answers, I'm the adult here, not him!" It's gonna take some time though, it definitely doesn't happen ovr night. I still am going through it with my 9 year old. I hoe this helps. Contact me again!! take care and don't be so hard on yourself! 

Name: afolmar | Date: Jul 17th, 2006 10:43 PM
My seven year old has ADHD and has been diagnosed since he was 3. We have had it all. He takes Ritalin LA 30 mg. But I am thinking we need to go up. He also takes Zoloft to take the edge off, but onl y 25mg. Why is your son on such a high dose? I just wondered if it might make my sons temper tantrums better, which usually occur when the Ritalin wears off. This time of day 5:00 p.m. is the worst and I am so tired by this time. I am a teacher so I do know alot of strategies but when it is your own child it is harder. I am taking Paxil and Clonazepam. But even that does not help sometimes. It just seems like it is one thing after the other. I also have a daughter and she does not have adhd. It is amazing how easy it is to control her compared to my son. Tell me a little about why the increase in Zoloft. I might want to talk to my doc about it. Afolmar 

Name: In Search of Sanity | Date: Jul 18th, 2006 3:54 AM
Well, I am so glad to see you are back "toirichmom", I went today to see my sons psychologist and it was so funny, I said, "Everything is going great" even though I had just had those melt downs just a few nights ago.... I dont know what it was, I didnt know how to explain that I was breaking apart and that I knew it wasnt my sons fault but that I was still going nuts!!! I did however make an appt. to see him by myself when the kids are back in school... so if I can just make it through another month!!! Heck if I made it this long! HUH :-) As for the diets that is AWESOME news... I will definately be going to GNC tomorrow to pick up some Omega 3. My son is also a HORRIFIC eater. He eats... frosted flakes, chick nugg, pepperoni, rice, pasta (no sauce) and bananas, I may be missing 3 or 4 things but I am not exaggerating, he is a terrible eater so I do have him on a teen vitamin but will be adding that to!!! As for his behavior, that is a whole other story, I am stern with him and according to a recent observation from my mother, I am too stern with him. Which is why I think my recent decline in major depression, I feel lousy that if my own mother says I am too stern maybe I am. But on other hand, like you say, we need to be, no one gets it... being in our shoes 24/7, they arent as easily handled as others. I am by no means NASTY! Just stern. I am SOOOO with you on the argument side, been there...well still there... I am constantly saying, I am the MOTHER- I tell you how long time out is, or I tell you what game is getting taken away, you dont tell me! Oh gosh, I am going on forever, we need to find a site that we can do private chat so we can exchange emails if you are comfotable with that! Stay in touch. INOS 

Name: In Search of Sanity | Date: Jul 18th, 2006 4:02 AM
Hi Alfomar, my son is on Zoloft 100 as of just a week ago, they started him on the 25 for I think a week or two and then said to move to 50 thinking we would stay there but I just went to see the doc and said the episodes of tantrums were less frequent but just as severe so what do we do? She suggessted to jump up to 100. I was VERY reluctant but she said he would probably be on it for only about a year or so max, so I have decided to try it. I am keeping fingers crossed! And yes, the reason for Zoloft in first place was to take care of when Concerta wore off in afternoon and for the general anger. I also have a 4 year old (so far not ADHD) son who WORSHIPS his brother and even though I can see him copying bad habits, it is truly amazing like you said, how different it is to discipline him. I would try the increase in zoloft, cant hurt, you can always take him off, I asked about that and she said it is an easy one to stop. Oh she did say the normal to watch for increase in stomach aches and the likes. Hope this helped. Let me know if any more questions about it. INSOS 


Name: iamlisa | Date: Aug 1st, 2006 3:30 AM
you do my dear, this is hell and you need help too. hes gets his ADHD from someone and its probablt you. Adults with ADHD have an extremely hard time with the kids with the same disorder. Get some meds it does help 

Name: tattybabe | Date: Aug 2nd, 2006 9:03 PM
i know exactly what ur going through i have just been 2 the doc with depression again it's the 3 time in about 5yrs just as i start to get better then things get worse again i;m desperate 

Name: MichelleM-W | Date: Aug 2nd, 2006 11:23 PM
I think you need to be on Zoloft, or a vaccation! It sounds like family counceling would do you good. I have never heard of someone as young as six years old on Zoloft. And a 100mg at that. 100mg is the maximum dose for a full grown adult. Did you get a second opinion before he started on that? 

Name: MichelleM-W | Date: Aug 2nd, 2006 11:31 PM
Also, I noticed when I took the DVD and Tv out of my daughters room she started going to sleep right away. Watching TV in bed like that is stimulating. And believe me, she put up a fight when we took it out, but she was over it real soon. Cant hurt to try! 

Name: joanne | Date: Aug 23rd, 2006 5:09 AM
yes seeing a doctor would be good but you also need a pat on the back which your not getting,from your husband....has he been to a doctor lately too.? 

Name: teresa | Date: Sep 15th, 2006 12:57 PM
Since I had children, PMS is awful, and with an ADHD child, it is off the charts. I went to my doctor and he prescribed Sarafem for PMS. It worked great, but I was allergic to it. Now I am on Zoloft and it does help. I firmly believe that if my child wasn't ADHD, I would not need these drugs. It may sound crazy, but I believe they can smell the hormones coming from my body and my daughter is always worse when I'm PMS'ing. I my talking with other mothers with ADHD children, I would say, 8 out of 10 are on some type of medication for control. 

Name: distracted at home | Date: Sep 15th, 2006 3:20 PM
Hey in need of sanity...I know what you are going through. I too have doubts when disciplining my kids, 5 and 3, especially with the tantrums. The one thing that jumped out at me when I read your message was that you asked if you should "just let this one go". I think a lot of us wonder the same thing. I have found that choosing your battles is very important, however once you have chosen them...you need to be consistant (no moer letting this one go). You need to determine beforehand which behaviors you will tolerate and which you will not. For example running in the house could be ok, as long as there is no jumping on the furniture, questioning you decisions is ok but it must be done with a respectful manner/tone of voice etc. They need to know beforehand what is ok and what is not. You can write the rules down on a FAMILY RULES chart (make sure you do it with your childs imput and thay will feel they created the rules as well and they will be far more likely to relate and accept them when they are reminded) That way your children don't feel they are constantly being told no. The reason children have tantrums is simply because they know from experience that you will sometimes give in if they do it. It will take a few weeks or sometimes only days but it WILL WORK. Choose your battles but once you decide which is OK and which is not, be consistant. If you back down once because of a tantrum...the next time they will take it that much farther. I am adhd and know from experience that ruling with an iron fist creates resentment, lack of self confidence and self esteem. I suggest that everyone look into the "Highly sensitive child" it seems to me most of the add/adhd's out there could fit that mold as well and I use the techniques to raise my kids and they works like a charm. The highly sensitve shild model is a much more positive way to look at the challenges of us stubborn folk. Cheers 

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