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Name: shanon
[ Original Post ]
i think my 8 year old son has adhd i havent taken him to see a doctor cause im not sure im very consistant with disapline but NOTHING seems to work ifeel like hes out of control. he has a hard time paying attention to anything i get so frustrated with him i dont know what to do anymore i cry because i feel so bad when i yell and scream at him. How do they dignose adhd? and what do you tell your doctor when you bring your children in? I guess im afraid of the doctor thinking its just a lack of displine.
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Name: Michelle | Date: Aug 22nd, 2005 6:12 AM
I had the same problem until I got a diagnosis, most people think ADHD children just lack disapline, my daughter drives me crazy to the point I scream and shout but just visit your gp and tell them evereything make a list before you go stateing what your child does but keep your chin up and do not let them fob you off, you have a problem and it will not go away there is no shame in saying you feel like killing them at times, be persistant 

Name: Jane | Date: Sep 30th, 2005 5:26 PM
Please don't be afraid the fact that you are writing here proves you care and want the best for your son. Go to the doctor and get help now as it will be harder the older he gets. My son is ADHD and now he is diagnosed I am building a relationship with him that I never had before. Good Luck 

Name: teegan | Date: Oct 1st, 2005 12:57 AM
i have adhd 

Name: Debby | Date: Oct 3rd, 2005 5:47 PM
My 8 year old daughter was first diagnosed with ADD last year. I suspected that there was a problem. For me, the key was getting feedback from her teachers. From Kindergarten on, all I heard from her teachers was that she had a lot of difficulty focusing and completing her assignments. I had her evaluated first by a Pediatric Neurologist who just handed me a prescription for Adderal. I was determined not to give her meds. I enrolled her in Karate because research showed that the martial arts teaches focus. She did learn to focus in the Karate class, but it did not help in school. I took her to a Child Psychiatrist who also diagnosed her with ADD. I put her on Strattera two weeks before school started. It seems to be helping her focus at school. She is in third grade and the pressure is on. The problem is her behavior seems worse at home. Discipline has nothing to do with it so stop feeling guilty. ADD makes every Mom feel like a failure. My house is like a battle ground. I know it's not discipline because my 6 1/2 years old does not act the same way. Maybe having your child evaluated will make you feel better and you will stop blaming yourself. You can start by talking to your Pediatrician and he/she should be able to refer you to someone. I don't think anyone can understand what it's like to live with an ADD child except another parent living with it. It is horrible! I always feel bad. I try so hard not to yell but I always end up yelling and saying things that I never thought I would say. Then the guilty eats away at me. Good luck and don't be afraid. It is better to know the truth. 

Name: Ruth | Date: Oct 6th, 2005 3:09 PM
I'm trying the same concept that the sea world trainers use, positive reinforcement. What you do is give small rewards for good behaivor and ignore the bad. I even got the school included and it has work great. My son just turned 15 and has had ADHD since he was 4yrs. He also take Adderall, with out it he gets into all kind of trouble. 

Name: chris | Date: Oct 11th, 2005 7:56 PM
Our 8 year old daughter was diagnosed when she was 6. We have experienced some of the same problems. It does help to get a diagnosis. Medications have helped somewhat, and she is doing well in school. However, homework is a constant struggle-to the point of becoming a battle. Yes, she is better at school than she is at home, however, I was reading that this is a characteristic of girls with ADHD. They are quieter, cause less problems at shcool, but let it out at home where they feel safer. She can be quite stubborn, mouthy, and gets into things constantly. No form of discipline has really seemed to work for an extended period of time, with the exception possibly of grounding her. She likes to be on the go! 


Name: Michelle | Date: Nov 2nd, 2005 10:59 AM
get relief
go
and your not worried about that you may have adhd as well
take a test at home 

Name: jennie | Date: Nov 2nd, 2005 10:50 PM
my daughter has adhd and is on the go constantly i feel she is out of control NOTHING works any more the school have lots of problems with her but refuse to give her help we have tryed her on medication but shes had bad reactions i dont know what to do i cry and feel so guilty 

Name: jbsr_mom | Date: Nov 3rd, 2005 2:54 PM
The school should be able to help dignose him. I've also learned that a can of caffeine (cola, mt dew, dr pepper) has a calmming effect. Be strong, hold your head up and don't stop until your son is in control! 

Name: Tara | Date: Jan 6th, 2006 5:38 PM
I'm not sure what is up with my son. I'm a first time mom of a 3 1/2 year old. I don't think he has ADHD. He is able to consentrate, but he always interups people and if people tell him to stop, he gets extremely mad at then and starts yelling at them. He will also seem fine one min. then says he hates you the next, then is fine again. My boyfriend thinks he is extremely aggressive for a child, but i'm not sure if it's just he is a little boy who likes to play. Is this normal behavor for a child of should I worrie?? 

Name: shannon | Date: Jan 23rd, 2006 2:13 PM
Hello
I know what you are facing we have an 8 year old daughter who has ADHD and now is on the proper meds. I must tell you we spent along time tying to get doctors to listen to us about our daughters issues, it was like one minute she would hit someone, the next the teachers could not get her to listen and pay attention. one time a teacher put my daughter in time out and my daughter turned around and kicked the teacher. we believe in discipline and have read the majority of books out there on parenting and on ADHD and many other books. My wife is a nurse so she fought with doctors constantly to find out what was wrong with our daughter. The doctors would say that it was just a stage she was going through or there was nothing wrong with her, but they did not have to live day and night with our daughter so they did not know what we went through and when we explained how she behaved they bassically did not totally believe us.After along time we finnally got a referal to see a specialist in Madison Wisconsin and after many visits she was diagnosed with adhd and put her on meds. alot of problems still persisted and we went through different types of meds to see which ones would work for her per doctors orders. nothing seemed to really work for her. finnally we asked to see another specialist and asked him not to look at her medical history and evaluate her as a new patient after a few visits the doctor came to the conclusion that our daughter had ADHD and a condition called Ashburgers syndrome wich is almost like autizim it deals with sensory issues etc. Any way as you can see parents must be verry diligent in seeking help for there children and also persistant you are the only one who can be your childs voice so do not give up. it can be difficult and frustrating and takes alot of work on the parents part as far as doctors visits, learning how to handle your childs mood swings and discipline with love, remember People with AdHd acts out of compulsion alot I should know I am 32 years old and have had this all my life and I was just diagnosed my self about 2 or 3 years ago and it explained alot of lifes problems that I had. Stand up for your child no one else is going to do it and there are tests to see if your child has this condition.
Sincerely
Shannon 

Name: jacob | Date: Jan 30th, 2006 4:27 PM
hi 

Name: Trish | Date: Feb 24th, 2006 8:29 PM
Hi I have a three year old son and he is similar to yours and i was to the point either they were going to put me in a nut ward or they were going to have to take care of him he was completly out of control and when I took him to his primary doctor they refered me to Mental Health. I took him there and they eveluated him and said that he was able to seek medical attention for it and they sent him to a Therapist and they had a Therapist Doctor evaluat him and he said he had ADHD which was a hard thing for me to cope with because he has been put on ridalin, Adderal and now he is on concerta and they think now that he dont have ADHD that he has Ashburgers it is a form of Autisim. So when you do this be carefull because they could be filling his body with a bunch of pills for not that reason. Any more questions write back 

Name: cynthia l bainter | Date: Mar 11th, 2006 5:55 PM
have you ever thought tha t the behaivor is food related, proscessed food contain s so maney chemicals mabey its hurting all our children... think about it... look at what thier eating it could help. 

Name: MENDY | Date: Apr 3rd, 2006 8:11 PM
Since day 1 I new somethig was different, my 4 year old just wasn'tlike the other kids. I've been told by daycare workers he's a genious, but he has problems understanding question, and he loves to act out things he see's on TV. He has an incredable memorey and can tell you your part and his part of one of his shows. But he dosen't hold a conversation well and will lapse into something he's seen on TV. He new is ABC's by sight when he was 2, could count to 10 in english or spanish at 2 1/2 and he can read and spell over ten words now. However he won't lesson when you try to get him to do something unless you yell and get his attention. Alot of times he'll scream at you he can't do it. When you know he can. He's a very happy boy and will play with anyone, he crys whenever someone his hurt even spongebob. And can speak in full sentences, but didn't untill just recently. It's like he dosen't get alot of things for a long time, and then all of the sudden he does. He Teachers at his daycare say he had ashburgers, which some of what I've read suggested he does. But alot of what they say, doesn't fil at all. They've never menitoned ADHD or anythings else. My son is very hard to understand .I wonder sometime if he just doesn't get it or just dosen't want to. It's making me nuts I feel I should punish him more but I don't like to spank him unless he's really acting out and I know he know's better.I feel I am not consistent enough with him but I just don't no how to be. He flunked the Kindergarden requirement because they won't let me go in with him. Everything they asked him to do he can do at home, but he didn't feel comfortable with them. He won't sit down and be quite and won't lesson if he doesn't want to and you can't make him. If I go in and tell him to stop it, or to do what they want he will but I have to get mad and yell and then he know I mean it. If you just ask him to be quite, he won't he will not stop talking, he talks all the time, even after he get in trouble for it he just keeps on and on. Then if you send him to his room for it, he crys and dosen't know what he's in trouble.?????? 

Name: h | Date: Apr 4th, 2006 3:58 PM
hi 

Name: Jen | Date: Apr 7th, 2006 4:34 AM
Shanon - stop feeling bad! You are doing the best that you can. It is extremely difficult dealing with an ADHD child. I recently took my 5 year old son to a ped. nuerologist, feeling the same way you did, and there was no stigma. I thought they would look at me like I'm a terrible mom, but they didn't, in fact they made me feel better! Talk to the school. Ask to have a behavioral observation done and an on-task observation done. Take this with you to the pediatric neurologist. Let me tell you -ITS NOT YOU and ITS NOT HIM! If you didn't love him so much you wouldn't feel so bad. Take him in and stop worrying! You have done your best it's ok to ask for help! 

Name: Cathy | Date: Aug 30th, 2007 12:21 AM
I work with adult mentally disabled and handicaped. I can tell you the screaming and yelling is doing more harm than not punishing him. There are ways to work with the child. Offer rewards. Little things. But most of all you get that young man to the doctor NOW if not now then YESTERDAY. And hang what the doctor or anyone else thinks. The child always should come first and formost. Do it before you become out of controll and do more harm. Put yourself in the childs shoes. How would you feel someone yelling all the time. Get him to see someone. PLEASE for his sake and for later in his life. 

Name: hateitall | Date: Aug 30th, 2007 7:25 AM
It's hard to know whether your child's overactivity and inattention are normal for his or her age, or if there is a problem that needs to be addressed. That's why a medical evaluation is imperative, especially because it can help rule out other possible explanations for your child's symptoms, such as a hearing problem. Certain questions will be asked during the medical evaluation, such as, "Are these behaviors excessive, long-term, and do they occur more often than in other children the same age? Are they a continuous problem, not just a response to a temporary situation? Do the behaviors occur in several settings, or only in one specific place, like the playground or in the schoolroom?"

If you suspect ADHD, and notice the following patterns consistently, consider getting a medical evaluation when:

Your child's inattention or hyperactivity causes significant problems at home and at school, and is not due to a recent crisis or significant routine change.
Your child has a persistently high activity level that interferes with relationships or causes personal injury or injury to others. 

Name: lola | Date: Oct 17th, 2007 8:56 AM
ifeel so bad and ithnk thers no bady love me what ican do in these proplem 

Name: Dana | Date: Mar 9th, 2008 6:46 PM
My son was diagnosed with adhd at age 6. He did not have the hyperactivity portion, but concentration was definate;y an issue. The Dr. gave 

Name: j | Date: Mar 9th, 2008 6:47 PM
i like to chat 

Name: huh | Date: Mar 9th, 2008 6:48 PM
im tired u? 

Name: mwg | Date: Jan 14th, 2009 4:58 AM
am not a mother but a daughter...discipline for me has been something which i didnt care..but soon after i realised that it has an important role to play in my life..i have been attending a college whereby there were strict rules n regulations...it has not only helped me to differentiate between myself and others but has also help to change my behaviour..now am very much sure i wont hav any difficulty whenever i have to join in a work...manners count more than efficiency...today am the daughter of a proud mother :) 

Name: mary | Date: Mar 4th, 2009 9:29 PM
its my 7yr old nephew,my sister will not see that he needs help because i think if not he will end up killing someone or his self he talks about deaf and wanting to kill him self then the next min his sobbing and when we are being nice you just cant win his shouting screaming and running away if someone could advise me so i can try and make my sister see that he needs to see someone 

Name: trasca | Date: May 10th, 2009 12:10 PM
Your children are the way they are.They are not made that way but are born that way.There make up is just that as the peditrician has told me a number of times. I am sick of feeling guilty and blaming myself for something that is not my fault.Yes you can contribute to making them worse of course by the way you act and scream but pick you battles.Let little things slide it's easier to do this then be in a constant screaming match.We all have a vision of how our children should be,what is excepted of them and that the other boy or girl of the same age is not like your child.So our children are different,but we love them anyway.They do not have a terminal illness thank god yes thay will have it for the rest of there life but it is something you can work with. As many people on this forum have stated the child should always come first.They are confussed no matter whay age they are. I have 2 boys 16yrs and 6 yrs both with ADHD and a few other issues. My 16yr old is doing great now it has been a had battle and a long rod which wont end as I will never stop helping him ni matter waht age as long as he wants it.My 6yr is different again but can be similar in a few ways as the older one, but again we as parents have to research,ask questions read more find more specialist,be a child advocate more then ever get the school to take some resonsibility as your child is at school for most of there waking day and be firm with the school system. These children all learn in there own way not the way the schools want them to most times.So far i have had great sucsess with my eldest and starting to get somewhere with my 6yr old byt very slowly. Look the only people that know how you feel is the parents of the same sort of children. start your own support group in your own home once a week I am and its the best thing ever. you will have parents knocking down your door if your just put something in the school news letter asking for interested partys for an ADHD support group.2 heads plus thousands more are better then 1.good luck to you all from Australia 

Name: makayla | Date: Feb 3rd, 2010 3:55 PM
sorry great story 

Name: hannna montanna | Date: Aug 11th, 2010 5:54 AM
hey 

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