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Name: hayz
[ Original Post ]
hi i am a mum of two georgus boys my eldist has adhd im struggling to find support i feel so alone i just wont some one who understands the day in day out struggles u deal with x
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Name: nikki | Date: Nov 7th, 2012 6:34 PM
hey, i have 2 children too, my eldest is 4 almost 5, ive been useing the local sure start for years now, seeking help from all sorts of proffesionals, behaviour management, i did the incredible years course.. twice and have been going back to the specialist dr for 2 years now, every time i go he sends me off after saying their is nothing wrong with my 4 year old, however the last time we went (6 months ago now) he reffered us to a behaviour specialist nurse, who spent an hour and 45 mins with us, asking questions and observing my sons behaviour, as a result she has reffered us back to this dr, and am still wating for an appointment, she also believes my son DOES have adhd, and im almost 100% he does, he started full time school in september, and has struggled continuosly, i havent seen any improvement in any of his behaviours, and the school are also struggleing with him, hes got the label now of 'the naughty child' even by the parents, its very embarrasing and i too do feel very isolated and judged, i was just wondering if you had any advice litteraly anything would help... im really not sure what else i can do as a parent its getting me so down, thanks x 

Name: Megan | Date: Nov 24th, 2012 5:17 AM
They are always reluctant to diagnose a child under 6 with ADHD. We had the same problem. Our dr kept telling us my son would grow out of it and it was "normal" behavior for his age. But as parents, you know your kids better than anyone and you know what isn't normal. My son is 6 and is now diagnosed with ADHD and I believe he probably has ODD too. It's a long journey, hang in there and keep perservering. We switched pediatricians and our new one is great....she set up a full evaluation for him at a children's hospital. We are seeing a behavioral specialist and he is on medication. We tried tons of different kinds but now find that about 8 mg of the Daytrana patch works very well. You can keep it on longer than the recommended 9 hrs (our psychiatrist told us that). The only issue is that sometimes it is itchy and he scratches it off before we want it to come off. But he is like a different kid when he is on it...polite, well behaved, pleasant to be with, quiet. We tried 20 mg at first and it was way too much. Even 10 makes him very anxious. So it's all a big experimental journey but one that is worth it. We felt very alone too and still do to some extent because we don't have anyone close to us going through this. It is TOUGH raising a kid with ADHD. Our son has been very hyper and extremely loud almost his entire life. His emotions are all over the top and it's constant drama with him every single day. getting him dressed is a nightmare, doing homework is awful, bedtime routine takes forever, etc. I'm sure you know. And it's frustrating because when you try to share it with others, they all say "oh my son does that too. That's a six yr old boy for you." No, it isn't! They have no idea. They might deal with similar behavior to a small extent but not the incredibly exhausting daily onslaught that we have. I do feel bad for my son because he really wants to be good. I know that he obviously can't control his impulses and it isn't fair to punish him too harshly for something that he can't control. I have read a few books on ADHD and sat through some webinars so that I have a good understanding of how his brain works. It must be very tough to walk around with a brain telling you to do things that are constantly getting you into trouble. So I have to sit back and gain perspective. It's tough but I try to do that at the end of every day and tell myself that tomorrow I'll try harder to be patient and to be a better mom. I want him to have a happy childhood and will do whatever it takes. it takes tremendous patience and I don't always have it but I'm trying. Follow your gut and if you know something is wrong, find someone who will take the time to listen and evaluate. I never wanted to give my son medication and fought it for a long time until I read that it would be like not giving a diabetic their insulin. It's not doing anything harmful, in fact it's almost more harmful not to give them medication that can help them. It's just correcting something in their brain. I finally realized that the benefits outweighed the cons. I also give him omega 3 vitamins and multi and get him Pediasure Sidekicks (choc milk and also the juice boxes) because he loses his appetite when on the medication and he is very thin. I make sure he eats healthy when he is hungry and that he gets enough sleep. We give him 1 mg of Melatonin before bed and it helps tremendously. It used to take him forever to get to sleep and now it only takes about 15 or 20 min and he never wakes up 'til morning (around 7. He goes to bed around 8:30). So hang in there and read everything you can so you have a great understanding of this disorder and find people who really want to help. They are out there. Good luck! 

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