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Name: unknown
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a little over 1 year ago my dad died. although he seemed dead long bbefore than. He had als, a disease that slowly makes youre nerves die. so before you know it you cant use youre hands, legs, head, and you start to lose youre ability to even breath. he had it about 7 or so years before he died. Before he died my parents were constantly fighting. My dad always called me a little shit and other such names. I thought once he died everything would be better but mom is still yelling at us constantly and smocking and drinking more than ever. Sometimes I feel like no one cares. What should I do?
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Name: unknown | Date: May 13th, 2006 6:19 PM
and now to add to the misery that no one cares about, my best friend in the whole world, the only thing keeping me together, is moving. Her parents hate this town, the school here and everything else. I'm not to sure why I'm telling you people no one seems to care.
-on the path of self destruction 

Name: p.c. | Date: May 14th, 2006 2:45 AM
I think people don't really know what to say to you. It's a tough time you are going through, especially watching your dad die in such a way.

Have you thought about keeping a blog or a journal? I have found that when I have really tough times in life, writing it out really helps me a lot.

Also maybe you should go to a school counselor and get a recommendation for a regular counselor. Most people go to counselors during tough times, it helps a lot. It sounds like your family could go together.

I'm sorry to hear your mom is drinking. Do you think she's maybe becoming an alcoholic?
You know your mom is going through a hard time. You know your dad as your dad, but to your mom, it's a very different thing.

Even though they fought a lot, at one point your mom and dad really loved each other, otherwise they wouldn't ve gotten married. And just because the fought, even if it was horrible terrible fighting, doesn't mean they did not still have a love for each other. When we stop loving a person, we just don't care. We don't even care enough to fight.

And when a person dies we think about all our memories of the person, and your mom may be thinking about some really good times they had together and is really hurting about losing him. And she might be feeling really bad about how they fought so much before he died. And then too, if she was taking care of him for so many years, there is a sort of symbiotic relationship that develops in such cases, so she is really suffering a huge loss. That could affect why she is treating you all so bad.

She's probably in a whole lot of hurt that she can't feel like she can talk to anyone about. It takes at least 3 years to go through the mourning process. Plus financially she must be going through some financial horror right now.

The news about your best friend on top of this all has to really really suck! Yah you can e-mail and i.m. her and talk on the phone still, but it's not the same. That really sucks. I'm sorry to hear about it, you don't need it on top of everything else.

I guess the only thing I can say is go to your school counselor and see if they can help you get yourself, if not your whole family into some grief counseling.

Hang in there. Through my life I have experienced some really bad spots, some even as severe as yours, and I haven't forgotten some of the stuff that had gone through my mind during those times.

If there is one thing I'd like you to remember, it is that Time does heal all wounds. It really does. And this time will pass, and you will have happiness again in life. It will be a different happiness though, because you have been forced to grow up a bit due to these experiences. You are now an official student in the "School of Hard Knocks you hear so much about. You are not alone in this school, even though it may feel like it.

So don't despair, really. Happiness will come again. So will pain. Life is a series of such things.

How we choose to react to it all makes up who we become.

I sincerely wish you well. 

Name: To unknown | Date: May 21st, 2006 2:06 AM
Move out if you're old enough to take care of yourself but if not ,see if you can stay with relatives that would be more loving. If it is really bad,call the department of child and family services and if they feel after a visit that you kids should be removed from the home,they will put you in foster care or allow you to live with a more suitable relative if one exists. 

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