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Name: majik25
[ Original Post ]
two weeks ago my son was assulted by his special needs schoolbus driver. He was in his seat restraint awaiting the educational assistant's arrival to let him off the bus (he uses pics to establish his routine, and he knows he must wait for assistance b4 getting off the bus) He was upset and crying due to the delay. The bus driver got angry at his crying and took the axe out of its sheath, held it up to my son, and told him she would "cut his head off" if he did not stop crying.
Unfortunately this occurred in the am and my son was unable to express his fright to the teachers during school. But at the end of school he became very upset and threw himself to the ground pleading not to go on the bus, it took 3 teachers and 20 minutes to place my son on the bus during which time my son kept crying he did not want to go on the bus. During this time the bus driver swore at my son and yelled at him in front of the teachers. During the 10 min ride to our home dylan became hysterical and I could hear screaming coming from the bus as it came down our street. As the bus stopped and I approached the door I could hear my son crying and the driver yelling for him to shut up. I entered the bus and went to my son, he was rocking and crying and was non-responsive. The bus driver refused to answer my questions as to what had happened so I got my son off the bus and called the school. The weekend was awful as my son began having night terrors and dirtying his pants again. he needed to be with either my husband or myself at all times or he began to regress into himself (rocking and hand shaking, moaning) On monday I learned from one of the teachers that another child on the bus had asked her if the bus driver would have really cut off my sons head? This accusation was later verified by the school principle in a discussion with the driver. It has now been a couple of weeks and my son is still experiencing the night terrors and other behaviours and my husband and I are searching for a therapist to help my son deal with the trauma. But so far the doctors feel this may affect him for the rest of his life. I love my son and will move heaven and earth to help him but i am still VERY VERY ANGRY that this happened on a public schoolbus for special needs children.
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Name: mondo | Date: Oct 16th, 2006 10:05 PM
I feel for you but more for your son for not being able to tell anyone his experience. I too always worry about strangers or even familiar people harming my son; my son is autistic and long ago a grade school student, he is now 19 yrs old and doing fine. I advise you to teach him sign language (ASL=American sign language)- it opened doors if not the world to my son, even if your son does not fully understand everything asked of him he might well surprise you as he might ask you something once he has a tool he can inittiate an idea with. My son also rode a school bus at about your son's age and let me tell you i would call the school to check on his arrival, sometimes i followed the bus, we kept a notebook going between the teachers and myself (my son carried it in his backpack), basically letting it be seen and known that many eyes are watchful of my son, the worry of someone doing him harm is always in the back of the mind and scary-get to know the people who interact with your son on a daily basis. it would be good to contact the school principal on this aacount and perhaps some teaching-awareness of your son's condition could be taught to EVERYONE who interacts with him daily and make it a part of your son's IEP. We had and still do have regular meetings with teachers/aides/principals,etc when issues of behavioral concern come up because more than half the time it was due to inexperienced aides/care takers (people unfamiliar with the actual condition of Autism and also because they went unsupervised when caring for him)- it helps to get many people involved. If there is a resource center for disability/support group in your area contact them and see what type of services they offer, I was fortunate to have one which offered advocates who accompanied me to school meetings and knew school policies, regulations, student rights, etc.--this makes everyone to be on their toes, sorry but it takes some stirring up to get things done sometimes....:) and it works out well for everyone in the end! You are in my prayers!! Keep us in yours! 

Name: KAREN SCHIMPF | Date: Oct 21st, 2006 6:36 PM
SAT OCT.21,2006 1:45pm

HELLO,

I must tell you, I read this a few days ago and was
so upset I couldn't even write until I calmed down.

I'm still so upset right now I'm having trouble.

First of all..........My heart goes out to you and your
whole family!

I need to ask, THE POLICE WERE CALLED...RIGHT?
THE BUS DRIVER WAS ARRESTED...RIGHT?
HE MADE A DEATH THREAT!
HE CARRIED A WEAPON ON A SCHOOL BUS!
HE WILL NEVER WORK NEAR CHILDREN
EVER AGAIN....RIGHT?
HE WAS FIRED.....RIGHT?
I'm sure these things were handled, but just in case
someone told you ,this is not serious...........IT WAS!

If you didn't call the police, call them now!
You need to start legal proceedings for a act of
terror, against your defenseless impaired child!
You are entrusted to protect his back at all times
and no doubt that's exactly what you are doing,
even as we speak!

I'm going to give you a small example of how long
our children can remember things.
All humans file data in their brains,a good deal of the
time....we forget where we filed it!
But our children are amazing...............WHEN THEY FILE DATA......
THEY KNOW EXACTLY WHERE THEY STORED
THAT DATA AND THEY CAN RETRIEVE IT AS THOUGH
IT WAS FILED TODAY!

Let me give you an example: When our son went on a
day trip with his class, he ate a hamberger.
I was surprised because he had only eaten one other
hamberger in his 18 years of life and he didn't like it!

I said 'Cliff I'm surprised you ate a hamberger!'
he said 'Yes.'
Then he said,' 1987'
Knowing he only ate one other I said,' Oh is that
when I gave you the other hamberger?'
'YES!'

HE REMEMBERED EATING A HAMBERGER.........
16 YEARS AGO !!!!!!!!

That's how fresh in his mind it was as though
he ate it yesterday only!
The have instant re-call!

I wouldn't start legal proceedings against the school,
(your son has to go to school for years and years and
they could retaliate) BUT I WOULD START PROCEEDINGS
AGAINST THE TRANSPORTATION COMPANY WHO
EMPLOYED A PERSON WHO TERRORIZED YOUR
BELOVED SON AND LEFT HIM TRAMATIZED for years to
come!

Don't let anyone give you the line,' deal with it.'
Let others pay for the theraphy that will now be
needed, just to get through your family's day and night!

We hear little kids are being arrested for bringing a
toy gun on the bus. THIS MAN HAD A REAL
WEAPON AND THREATENED TO BEHEAD A YOUNG CHILD!

PLEASE LET US ALL KNOW HOW YOU MAKE OUT...
PLEASE.

GRATEFULLY KAREN 

Name: rain | Date: Oct 22nd, 2006 5:09 AM
OMG! I can not believe this! This is awful! You need to call the police, please tell me your child is no longer on this bus with this nut? You have to contact the other parents who have children on that bus and warn them. I cannot believe the teachers heard this man use foul language in the presence of students and they still put your son on that bus. You also need to call the school police and the director of schools. 

Name: Lynne | Date: Oct 24th, 2006 2:20 PM
I totally agree with Karen and Rain! The Police NEED to be called and do a full investigation, this Bus driver is not fit to be doing a public duty, especially for Children with special needs. I have an Autistic son and I would stop at nothing for him. Don't let this person get away with this. You need to be a role model for our children and other parents. We need to stick together and protect our beautiful Children from people like this. Make him an example! Good luck and please let us all know what happens.

Heart broken,
Lynne 

Name: sylvia0366 | Date: Oct 26th, 2006 6:10 AM
Hello,
I agree with the people who answered your email, I hope you started legal procedures agains this person and I for one would hold the school responsible too, from what I read in your email, the principle had a discussion with this person? I hope this person is still not driving this bus? I just started sending my kids on the bus this September, after the school kept "insisting" that it would be good for them, I always refused because I was scared of something happening to them, as they are both non verbal and should something happen I would probably not know. I still taking them to school in the morning but the buses drop them off (they go to different schools and get off at the same time). My daughters driver is a nice lady and I have not had a problem yet, my sons driver is a little bit unfriendly, but luckily there is a lady who is the assistant in the class and she is on the bus with another child and she keeps an eye on Jake for me. All I know is if I ever see anything that I don't like I will immediately take my kids of the bus and I will pick them up even if I have to take them out of school early everyday.

Please let me know the outcome of your situation. I wish you the best of luck and hope your son gets better soon.

Sylvia 

Name: majik25 | Date: Dec 1st, 2006 3:02 AM
Thank you for all your support regarding my son's assult. To answer your questions YES the police have been contacted and the driver has been fired, is in the process of having her license downgraded And she has been listed on the police system as a predator so she cannot work anywhere in ontario with the vulnerable sector.
My son is still having problems, halloween was terrible his personality has changed, and we are on a rollercoaster with his behaviors. Some days he is able to sleep for 5 hours straight, but then he reverts back to having night terrors. He is
having to sleep at school as he cannot stay awake during class.
i am still driving him to school and the school has arranged to have dylan brought home in a minivan (just like mommies) and the new driver(different bus company) has worked with my son before he began riding her van home. He still cannot handle going to school but at least he can come home. The scariest thing is that he is having more and more "zoning out" incidents and I feel we are battling to keep him tuned into us.
we have finally found a therapist to help us deal with this nightmare and are taking things 1 day at a time.
respectfully 


Name: jennmom1 | Date: Dec 1st, 2006 4:23 AM
My God! I can't even imagine what you must be feeling. I would have trouble restraining myself from hunting that bus driver down. What a lunatic! Your poor son. I hope he gets better soon. I too have had issues with my sons bussing (although not to that degree) My son had to have a different driver drop him off one day and this man pulled up to my house (i was still inside but could see him through my tinted screen door.) and i watched as this man pulled up, obviously in a hurry, and dropped my son off (who was only 3 at the time) and jumped back in his van and left! He Left!!! My 3 yr. old autistic son standing outside of our house; not even knowing if anybody was home. My son is also an eloper...so he'll just take off. I ran outside and got my son and i was so angry. I called the school and the transportation company and it got me nowhere because the man that dropped my son off was the head guy for the transportation department. Needless to say, we have to be so careful and it's so sad that there are so few people that we can trust with our precious children. Good luck to you and your family...you will be in our prayers. 

Name: onlinedizzy | Date: Dec 1st, 2006 6:01 AM
Hi majik25, your son must be very traumatised by what has happened. You mention in your last post that he is zoning out a lot more and is hard to reach. Apart from the trauma has it ever been considered that your son might be having absence seizures? These used to be called petite mals a form of epilepsy where the child seelms to switch off for seconds or minutes and is unaware of anything around them. I used to notice my daughter was zoning out a lot and this is what it turned out to be. Epilepsy is quite common with people who have autism. It might be worth considering. Your sons stress and lack of sleep could be making it worse for him. I really hope your son can recover from this shocking incident. Liz 

Name: paulapoo377 | Date: Dec 1st, 2006 2:26 PM
YOU KNOW itell ya I have not read the responses of the other parents yet but I tell ya I be damned if some under paid moron ever treated one of my boys like that ......I am so outraged right now there is nothing tactful that I can even say All i can is I be damned paula 

Name: mtene5 | Date: Dec 2nd, 2006 4:53 AM
I am very frightened by your son's story. It has been very hard for me to put my son into a public school knowing that he is autistic and can not communicate to me if something happens to him. The first thing I would focus on if I was you is calling the police and having the driver charged with assault with a weapon and threatening the life of a minor. I can't imagine that this bus driver would just get a slap on the wrist for his actions. My next step after the state dealt with the busdriver would be to sue the driver and the school district. You should be compensated not because it will make you feel better but an incident such as this will take thousands of hours of therapy to help your son overcome if it is even possible for him to overcome it. I am so sorry for you son. 

Name: kellpee1978 | Date: Dec 3rd, 2006 7:02 AM
Thats bad makes you wanna be locked in a room with the driver and show her how it feels to be powerless and scared hopfully she wont be driver again. 

Name: jacksmom | Date: Jan 28th, 2007 4:01 AM
www.prepaidlegal.com 

Name: redi1956 | Date: Jan 28th, 2007 3:41 PM
I AM JUST WONDERING IF THE BUS YOUR CHILD WAS ON WAS FOR CHILDREN WITH SPECIAL NEEDS OR JUST YOUR AVERAGE SCHOOL BUS.THE SCHOOLS SEEM TO WANT TO MIX THE NORMAL WITH THE DIFFERENT THIS SAVE THEM $ THE SCHOOL OFFERED MY SON A BILINGUIL,CAN'T SPELL IT LOL ,IN ANY CASE MY SON HAS A HARD TIME UNDERSTANDING THE NORMAL WORLD ,CAN YOU IMAGINE HIM SITTING ON A BUS WITH EVERY ONE SPEAKIN ANOTHER LANGUAGE THIS SHOULD HELP HIS COMUNICATION SKILLS LOL WE WALK TO SCHOOL. 

Name: redi1956 | Date: Jan 28th, 2007 3:45 PM
LETS LIGHTEN THINGS UP A BIT,OMG-IF YOU SUE THE SCHOOL HOW WILL THEY GETS THE FUNDS TO HELP OUR SPECIL NEEDS CHILDREN LOL 

Name: majik25 | Date: Jan 29th, 2007 6:02 AM
Hi there redi1956
The Bus was a special needs bus. Good Luck Suing the Company , We are still awaiting a response from their lawyers.
Meanwhile My son is Missing so much school He cannot keep up with his class and the doctor is worried he is suffering from depression at 8 yrs old. I refuse to give my son prozac at his age!! We now have 2 therapists at over $200.00/hr working weekly with my son. We are exhausted but still plugging on. 

Name: pddnos | Date: Jan 29th, 2007 6:27 PM
I am so sorry this happened to your son, when people are employed to deal with special needs children you expect them to have a certain level of patience and knowledge, even to drive a bus. I can understand your anger, I too would be very angry, I am very angry at the moment about matters with my son, but hey its not about me. Just carry on doing what you are doing, you know best your his parent, its good though that you have his story verified and that the principle questioned the bus driver. What has happened to the bus driver? Have they been fired? If not you need to press for a new driver, you simply have to.

Concerned. 

Name: pddnos | Date: Jan 29th, 2007 6:52 PM
Sorry I did not realise how this site worked, new member. 

Name: drika | Date: Jan 30th, 2007 10:40 AM
I am very sorry to hear what happened and you and your son have all my sympathy and regret. I also have a 7 year old autistic son and he is my everything.It is exactly your situation that i am trying to avoid although aidan has a strong disposition, he remembers everything bad that happens to him, and it breaks my heart. This is my first time speaking to another parent with an autistic child. 

Name: majik25 | Date: Jan 30th, 2007 6:46 PM
Hi Drika
Thanks you for your comments. It is so difficult to trust that someone else will care for your child as you do. I am hyper vigilant I double and triple checked with the school and bus company whenever a change occurs. In the instance of the bus I went thru the loading routine with my son and the driver 3 days in a row showing the driver the routine but still 2 days later on a 5 minute bus ride she threatened him because he was upset that his EA was late to let him off the bus. The driver stated later that she felt that my son was "just a spoiled brat"
It is hard to explain to people how my son pictures events in his head in exact detail not in general concepts as others do. He re-lives the incident regularly in his dreams at night or when he sees a white school bus. I feel so guilty that he must endure this pain and keep asking myself if there was anything I could have done different.
I appreciate the support 

Name: Mel Mel | Date: Jan 31st, 2007 1:41 AM
Dear Majik25,
My name is Melanie. I'm sorry what they did to your son. I know that had to scare him badly, it would scare any child rather they have autisum or not. I have aspergers it's like a milder type of autisum. Yes I think it will affect him for the rest of his life too. The bus driver sounds like he was full of demons, to even threaten any child like that. I think it would take me a year or more to even calm down from that. I remember when I was in kindagarden that a student in the class stabbed me with a pencil and I'm 26 years old now and I hadn't never forgotten that. I would be having night mares too that is very frightening and disturbing for me to even read let alone if I had experienced like your son had. 

Name: majik25 | Date: Jan 31st, 2007 4:17 AM
Hi Mel Mel,
I appreciate your input as to how you would feel. I have searched the internet for any information on how a traumatic event can effect a child with autism and any suggestions as to how to help them cope. But alas I have been unable to find any information on that specific subject. Your personal experience helps me . thank you 

Name: majik25 | Date: Mar 14th, 2007 4:13 AM
Update,
my son has been diagnossed with post traumatic stress disorder. He is not doing well at school, he keeps falling asleep in class and i am worried he is going to lose his year.
The bus company and the school board are denying responsibility.
I recently read an article about children who suffer from ptsd can lead to a life long battle with depression and anxiety disorder. god when will this ever end !!!!!!!!!!
i need some word of encouragement
respectfully 

Name: ltl | Date: Mar 14th, 2007 4:35 AM
Majik25, I don't know what to say or how to make you feel better, but I am so sad for you and your son. I was hoping that it will get better since your last posting, but I'm so sadden to see that it was an ongoing struggle. Is he on any antidepressent meds? Is he still having those terrible nightmares?? Oh I do pray that the therapy helped and he no longer have those nightmares. Is there any place he likes to go or any particular things he likes? Perhaps continually placing him in a positive environment will help rid of his depression??...Just a stretch of thoughts... You and your son are in my prayers... Please continue to give us updates. 

Name: musketeer | Date: Apr 15th, 2007 4:36 PM
What a horrible experience! Sadly, children who are non-verbal and have no way to express their horror, fear and angst do carry the terror with them. I know. My son was assaulted, molested, when he was 5 by a respite worker. They believe he was gang assaulted. The worker molested his 7 year old sister as well, who finally, after 3 years told me what happened. We went through the nightmare of a trial, and the respite worker was aquitted because he stuck to his story that he couldn't remember being alone with my kids. The police lost a video tape of the worker doing graphic things to himself while taking care of my son and then striking him in anger. I understand your anger and frustration. My daughter faced her demons through the court process and finally talking about it. My son never has. He is now 12 and was held down at school by teachers and EA's while having a meltdown. This brought back the nightmares, fears and horrible anxiety. He just had to go on medication to try to calm him. He just had his first rage 2 weeks ago and I am now coping, barely, with building up the meds. Trust in the system that is supposed to care and support us is gone. But, for his sake, you still try to help him cope. Letting go of the anger hasn't been easy, but is necessary to move forward. I truly feel for you and your family. 

Name: jules3 | Date: Apr 18th, 2007 1:12 PM
Hi i know how you feel, something similar happened to my little boy as well. i would have the bus driver sacked how dare he threatened your baby ,he should not be around children fullstop.I took my son of the bus and took him to school myself. 

Name: jules3 | Date: Apr 18th, 2007 1:17 PM
Hi i know how you feel, something similar happened to my little boy as well. i would have the bus driver sacked how dare he threatened your baby ,he should not be around children fullstop.I took my son of the bus and took him to school myself.
call th police immediately and dont let anyone tell you otherwise. 

Name: FerretLady | Date: Apr 28th, 2007 2:18 AM
Hi Majik,
I am sorry to hear about this happening. That is totally unjustified, night terrors are actually normal for children after going through such an experience in-fact anything scary can inflict night terrors on special needs children or normal children for that matter. I know it will be hard but in time it should go away. 

Name: mikeys mom | Date: May 4th, 2007 11:30 PM
Wow, that's soooo horrible. I hope you find a good therapist. I hope the driver was fired! He should be. People are unbelievable. It's terrible when your child has night terrors and you can't console him, I know my son use to have them as well. I hope you find someone and have success, hang in there. Beth 

Name: jojojohnson | Date: Jun 6th, 2007 4:13 AM
hi,
my heart goes out to you! that is absolutely disgusting! i have such a hard time putting my son on the bus everyday, and i know that his drivers are great people!
i hope you can get the answers you need. and please fight this! for all of our children, be strong!
i hope your son is feeling better! he is in all of our prayers! i am so sad for what he is going through, wish i could help! 

Name: majik25 | Date: Jul 2nd, 2007 12:21 PM
Update, my son continues to have problems, he still wakes at night, and he still suffers from ptsd but due to financial limits I cannot afford ongoing therapy. The newest problem is legal, apparently because the incident occured on a motor vehicle (school bus)they claim that I must go through MY car insurance for compensation , the province I live in is a "no fault" one!
How stupid is that! First NO VEHICLE WAS INVOLVED IN THE ASSULT, THEIR EMPLOYEE WAS!!!!!!! AND HOW DOES ASSULTING MY SON INVOLVE ME AND MY CAR INSURANCE?
I am soooooooooo..... frustrated and angry at the legal bull$#@# BUT I will NOT give up!!!!!!!!
With determination and love for my son we carry on. 

Name: ltl | Date: Jul 4th, 2007 2:47 AM
Curiously, was it a lawyer that told you to go through your car insurance? I truely do not believe it. I would get a second opinion. I'm not trying to be silly but to exagerate, so if a child gets rape on a school bus, the matter should be handled through car insurance??....just different ways of being abuse, nonetheless, both kids still suffered tremendously. 

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