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Name: ASHLLEY
[ Original Post ]
HI MY NAME IS ASHLLEY AND I HAVE A 16 YEAR OLD BF HIS NAME IS LOUIE AND I WANT A BABY AND HE DOES TOO BUT I THINK IF I HAVE ONE MY MOM WILL FLIP CAUSE I AM ONLY 12 GONNA BE 13 BUT I REALLY WANT A BABY???HELP ME I EITHER WANT A BABY RIIGHT NOW OR WHEN IM 16!!!WITCH 1???
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Name: Tameka | Date: Feb 16th, 2006 7:13 AM
NO NO NO GIRL. DON'T GO OFF AND HAVE A BABY. YOU ARE WAY TOO YOUNG AND YOU'RE BODY HASN'T MATURED ENOUGH. YOU COULD HAVE SERIOUS COMPLICATIONS AND POSSIBLY DIE BECAUSE UR NOT MATURED ENOUGH AND HE CAN GO ON SUMWHERE ELSE BEFORE HE GETS CHARGED FOR RAPE. 

Name: preggy with #2!!! | Date: Feb 16th, 2006 1:34 PM
Neither. I think that you should wait. It is too early to have a baby now, I was 17 and had my son well 18 I was like right at the 18 mark put it that way. My husband B/F at the time was my age too and well we had a rough first 12 mo. It was not easy. He is 19 mo and we are now just now making it just enough and I am pregnant again at 20. I don't know what to do or say to make you realize that it is not as easy as it looks. I had a good baby and is told that quite often since he was born even he is what people call an "EASY BABY" well we still had a hard time money wise not just physical. 

Name: Christina | Date: Feb 16th, 2006 6:17 PM
Oh sweety, why don't you try baby sitting...to tell you the truth though I'm not sure if you are legally old enough to do that....13!! You have so much time to have children!! I'm 26 and I'm pregnant for the first time and this is scary for me! I'm Twice your age and still not fully prepared. Don't do it!! Please wait. Your mind has so much growing up to do let alone your body. Honey you've only been alive for 13 years!! You have soooo much time left what's the hurry!! 

Name: TO ASHLLEY | Date: Feb 16th, 2006 7:46 PM
GROW UP, THAT'S WHAT YOU SHOULD DO! 

Name: Sick baby | Date: Feb 16th, 2006 9:22 PM
At the hospital I worked at there was a 14 year old girl who was pregnant. She had her scan and it showed that the baby was anacephalic (no brain - part of skull missing). She had to go through labour and gave birth to a dead baby. Anybody who is considering becoming pregnant should consider carefully what they are doing. Having a baby is not a game - would you be able to deal with something like the above problem?

A child shouldn't give birth to a child. 

Name: cheryl | Date: Feb 16th, 2006 9:24 PM
You need to enjoy school, hanging out with friends,dances,sports etc.... having a child changes your life and from the moment you have that child that babies needs come first. your too young you need to concentrate on yourself right now. you have so much time to figure out what you want in life finish yor education and go to college,and get settled down beore thinking about children. Have you tried to get a puppy? that has some similarites to having a child without all of the financial responsibilites. maybe try babysitting...
your body isn't ready for a baby. you have years left to have children. 


Name: tom | Date: Feb 17th, 2006 1:46 PM
do not. if you have a kid now, you could mess up the rest of your life. 

Name: preggy with #2!!! | Date: Feb 17th, 2006 6:16 PM
OMG! That is a scary this a baby with part of a skull and no brain I bet that she was vey crushed, how did they figure that out and when was it when she went into labor or did she not feel the baby move yet? What happened? When was this? 

Name: Sick baby | Date: Feb 17th, 2006 8:53 PM
She found out when they did an ultrasound scan on her at about 7 months gestation. She hadn't told her parents that she was pregnant so that was the first scan she had. They induced the labout and she had the baby. Babies like this cannot live - they are either stillborn or die shortly after birth.

This happened about 12 years ago. She was in a bad state. 

Name: Korena 2 "sick baby" | Date: Feb 17th, 2006 11:53 PM
a human or any animal for that matter cant even be alive in the first place it they/it dosnt have a brain so how can they live for a short while and then die if they are already dead ?!?! 

Name: Michele | Date: Feb 18th, 2006 10:10 PM
Korena the baby is alive with breathing and a heart beat because there is a brain stem that controls autonomic body activity, just not a cerebrum. In my 12 years of neonatal ICU nursinng I only saw it once thank God. Ashley, you have a whole life ahead of you to have babies. Enjoy being with your boyfriend, going out, having fun....Someday when you are in your 20's and have a baby you will see that we are right! 

Name: Ashlie | Date: Feb 20th, 2006 9:55 PM
Ashlley you are just a baby don't make a mistake and wait that could ruin your life honey you are so young y would you want a child, when you are not even old enough to get a job. and you bf may say he wants a baby now but I do have a couple of friends that their man said the same thing and now they are stuck taking care of a baby all by them selves. Why don't you do yourself a favor and wait. PLEASE!! You are way to young wait until you have been together longer well how long have you been together and wait until you are old enough to support yourself. This post just made me really sad. Why you would wanna do that. I mean I am 19 years old and I am happily married and now I am 4 months pregnant, I think that I waited long enough. Honey when I was your age sex was the last thing on my mind. I mean I was playing barbies and I was running from boys not having sex with them. Think about it honey you have got so much ahead of you Please just think about it. 

Name: mary joe | Date: Feb 21st, 2006 5:44 PM
I bet your mom will do more then flip. I am sure she is the person you would depend on to baby sit when you want to go out on a date with your boyfriend. I am sure at 12 you aren't in the finacial situation to care for the baby. What is a 16 year old doing with a 12 year old girl anyway, boys are very decietful at that age please dont do it. 

Name: naomi | Date: Feb 22nd, 2006 1:44 AM
wait ! you will be sorry if you have it at a young age live your life you know enjoy 

Name: brittany | Date: Feb 26th, 2006 2:47 AM
Honey, i am only 18 and let me tell you i am glad i waited me and my husband have been to together for a long time, butwhen we were 15 we thought we should get pregnant, so let me tell you wait. A baby grows you up 2 fast and puts to much responsability on a young women like yourself. I am still not completly ready for a baby, i mean i have college and everything to deal with how can you go o school with a child on your hip. i mean i now women have done it but, i am sure they have said i wish i wouldve waited. A child is a great thing, a wonderful thing, but it is something that should come later in life, you are just a baby yourself. 

Name: Markera | Date: Feb 27th, 2006 2:24 AM
Who's going to take care of the baby financially? What emotional ideas and stability are you able to provide for a child? What happens when, not having finished school, your child needs help with homework? Who is going to show you proper care of the baby if your family and his disown both of you because of the baby? What will you do if the baby destroys your immature body the way the girls in Africa suffered that Oprah showed on her show? What happens if you die in childbirth or shortly after leaving your bf to deal alone with a child? What if your bf leaves you because things just don't work out after you have a baby or while you are pregnant?
NEED I GO ON? 

Name: samantha | Date: Mar 10th, 2006 4:02 PM
plz dnt av a baby nw it will ruin ur life u might think u wnt one but wen it happens u will wish u neva did it u av all ur life to live n dnt wana ruin it nw n i wuld be suprised if ur mum does nt go mad as u r onli 12 u might be cumin up `13 but ur still onli a little girl plz jst wait till ur older 

Name: Amanda | Date: Mar 14th, 2006 3:04 AM
Sweet heart all I have to say is don't rush into losing your childhood so fast! I know from experience I was married and having a child at 17 and even though it all seems great in the moment,,.. it gets not so 'magical' Having a baby isn't all great.. though it is rewarding when you have children at the right age in and when your life is established.. having a child at your age wouldn't be so smart. You need to enjoy your life while your young.. enjoy.. hanging out with friends, going to the movies, and go shopping because sweet heart when you have a baby you don't do that anymore. I think you need to slow down and enjoy life before you decide to have yourself tied down,.. with diapers, and constant caring for an infant. In no way would it be smart for you to get pregnant NOW OR when your 16!! 

Name: mango | Date: Mar 14th, 2006 9:57 AM
why have baby when u so young in joy your life 

Name: sarah | Date: Mar 14th, 2006 4:29 PM
honest girl if ur only 12 hes 16 theres an age gap plus a baby would ruin ur live have 1 wen ur 25 not 12 or 16 

Name: Jaylafive | Date: Mar 15th, 2006 4:37 AM
When I was 13 I knew this girl that got pregnant she was also 13. Anyway before we turned 20 the girl had 4 kids(we are now 25). I saw her in the grocery store and she now has 6 children.
She is way to young to have so many children and all the children have different fathers.
You dont want to be like. On welfare trying to support you children and still living at home with your mom.
I was 14 when I started wanting a baby. I had my first child at 18.
I think you should at least finish high-school and then at 18 maybe 20 then you could think about having kids.
Dont rush it, its hard having children. 

Name: Corinna | Date: Mar 15th, 2006 10:19 PM
Please wait Ashlley~a baby is not all fun and games. I understand you want someone to love. But at the age of 12, I dont think you quite know what love is relationship wise. You have "puppy love" and "i wanna be a mommy" syndrome.You will grow up so much in your teen years.Gosh you arent even a teen yet...how could you possibly understand the responsibility of a living breathing baby. It pains me to think that you would even consider doing this. How are you gonna feed the baby? Who's going to watch it while you go to school? Oh, you'll drop out huh? Then who's going to watch the baby while you work(and o yes~you are going to have to work!!!)? What kind of future will you give your child making minimum wage working two jobs and never getting to see your child because most likely the 16 yr old your are with could leave you. It happens all the time!!!!! Just dont do it. I hate to be so hard but dont ruin your life and that of an innocent baby! 

Name: Erica | Date: Mar 16th, 2006 5:39 PM
Ashlley,
I know you may want a baby really really bad but what you need to do is ask yourself and your boyfriend where do you see yourself in even one year. Where ever it is, if you have a baby it won't be there. When we are young we think that we know how things can turn out. I thought I did. I got pregnant at 16 and had my first son at 17. I thought I was ready to have a baby. I wanted to have one so bad. When I got pregnant niether his father or I had a job. I thought his father would go out and get one and support us but that wasn't the case. I ended up going to school full time and working part time. I had to save up so I could get my license and a car all by myself. I'm not saying that your boyfriend won't support you and the baby but whatever you do just wait time changes things and people. Wait until you have gone through school at least high school, I know it seams like forever now but please believe me when I say "there's no going back." The baby will suffer more than you will. If you are upset the baby will be upset even if you don't show any signs of being upset. This child will be apart of you and believe it or not will one day know more than you do because that is what nature intended, for our offspring to learn more and be smarter than we are. I do not have my son now. He is with my mother in Florida and I am in New York and it is so hard everyday to be without him. I am greatful to my Mother for taking care of him but it kills me inside to know how much I have missed out on in his life. Again I was 17 when I had my son, I am now 22 and am due to have another baby April 2nd 2006 and I know that finacially we ( my husband and I) are still not ready. You are going to do what you want to either way, I just hope that one of us convinces you to wait. Wait until after you are out of school and have a lisence and your own car, a good job and your own place. You need to have all these thing for yourself first. Having a baby will not help you in anyway to obtain these things, it would only make it harder. Please believe me, I know. 

Name: Concerend about you! | Date: Mar 17th, 2006 6:06 PM
Just answer yourself these questions?
1. Do you have the money to suit all the needs that babies have?
--you are not even old enough to work @ your age. Your boyfriend is, but and if he stays with you, he will only be able to find a minimum paying job at a fast food restaurant, and he will soon be tired of doing this everyday. Sooner or later he will quit and look a different direction.
2. Do you have a home (of your own; not your parents or his) where you can safely grow a child?
--children need safe places to grow like other normal children, and @ your age, you will not be able to provide one for it. It will not be your parents' or his responsibility to provide one for you and your baby.
3. Do you know of all the needs you still have?
--You are just 12 about to turn 13. You yourself, still have a lot of needs, and once you have a baby, the baby's needs have to go first (if you are responsible enough) and put yours aside.

I am 19 about to turn 20 and have a one year old, and I love her and she means the world to me. My boyfriend now my husband and I decided to have a baby when we we're 17 and him 18. I wish I would have written like you did to ask about for someone else's opinion. I don't regret having my princess, but If I turn back time, I would not have had her. I am now a college student and work at the same time, but it is very hard for me because I have to be away from my daughter. I now see my friends going out to party and studying full-time in college and I can't because I now am forced to put all that aside and look for my daughter's needs first. I wish I could go out on the weekends to party and come back home late at night, get up the next day and enjoy my time for myself, but now I can't because she is no one's responsibility but mine and my husband's. There is time for everything in life, listen to everybody who tell you to wait, for we know already. If you wait, and then look back when you are older, you will understand each and everyone of these words.

One good advise is to talk to your mother about this. She is you mother first and forremost, and if she gets upset with you, just tell her that you love her and that you will wait. She loves you very much, and is concerned about you that is why she will talk to you in an upset manner because she loves you and wants the best for you. Talk to your boyfriend and if he cannot understand, is because he doesn't love you as much.

By the way if you get pregnant at this age, you will probably undergo a C-section, and it is not very nice. Your body is not matured to deliver a baby, so your stomach wil orobably have to be cut-open for you to have that baby. It is not as easy as it looks. I am concerned for you, so don't just don't. 

Name: Concerned about you! | Date: Mar 17th, 2006 6:21 PM
If some of these coments help you, please let us know! Thanks 

Name: Do you really want to know? | Date: Mar 17th, 2006 6:33 PM
Hey Ashley, if you really want to know what givin birth is like, just visit this page http://www.partofeliz.com.ar/video.htm or this other one for a C-section http://www.partofeliz.com.ar/cesarea.mpg I know these scenes are not supposed to be seen by a 13 year old, but since you are asking about it. Just take a look at it, imagine what these women went trhough or better yet put yourself in their spot. At your age, I would faint!! 

Name: corey | Date: Mar 17th, 2006 8:43 PM
hi 

Name: Alice | Date: Mar 18th, 2006 4:05 AM
dont listen to them i had a baby at 13 and nothing went wronge but im not saying to go out and get pregnant but dont listen to them, im 14 and 23 weeks pregnant with twins a boy and girl. 

Name: Cleo[3 | Date: Mar 19th, 2006 2:15 AM
I say you wait until you're done school . Don't do it to yourself- you'll regret it!! 

Name: JACKIE | Date: Mar 19th, 2006 4:47 AM
YOU SHOULND HAVE A BABY U ARE TO YOUNG. 

Name: brittany | Date: Mar 19th, 2006 10:24 PM
no your too young wait a coupel years ok ashley 

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