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Hi! I'm Meg, My husband moved out over 2 years ago while our little one was only 18 mo. old. We had major communication and irreconciable differences that eventually led me into an affair. I thought I loved that man but realized that he told me things that I needed to hear in order to get me in the sack. I made alot of mistakes in blaming him for everything that went wrong but now realize that I was out of my wits. Now that I am trying to get my life back in order and make good decisions for myself and my daughter, I'm left to raise this child through joint custody. It has been painful, yet I try to stay positive. I just thought that if anyone needs a friend in a similar situation, send me a message. Thanks! ↓
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| Name: girly29 | Date: Sep 18th, 2006 2:01 AM |
| Hi Meg...I am also raising my children in a joint custody arrangement...I've been a single mother for almost three years..I have a boyfriend now, but I live alone with my kids...How is your custody arrangement set up...one week at a time or ?.. ↑ |
| Name: Meg | Date: Sep 18th, 2006 5:06 PM |
Hi Girly, It's nice to hear your response....my little one gets dropped off to me on Sunday morning and I have her all week long.... untill friday around 5 and then he has her overnight most friday's and most saturdays (unless he has other plans i always take her if he does) It works out good for me cuz my busiest and longest days at work are on Friday and Saturday and I'm off work Sun, mon, and tues. It's sort of complicated but I wanted her schedule to be as consistant as possible throughout the school week.... It's been really hard getting used to any type of arrangement... I wanted out of the marriage, but it seems really unnatural to not have my baby in my house every night! Everyone says that I have to get used to it and it gets better. My ex and I try to get along as good as possible even though we had a major breakup and battles through the courts the first year!!!
I live alone also and have a bf or whatever you want to call him! My friends don't really like him but I'm love him and am so attached to his little girl who my daughter loves to play with.
How many kids do you have?? What's your arrangement? ↑ |
| Name: Drunk step mom | Date: Sep 23rd, 2006 4:27 AM |
| affiairs do not happen unless you do not love your spouse. Don't be guilty. BUT, second families are a bitch. ↑ |
| Name: Drunk step mom | Date: Sep 23rd, 2006 4:31 AM |
| I have my kids 6 out of seven days (two grade school age boys), though they are with dad three nights. I have my step son three nights a week, including most of the weekend, god help me. I have our "ours" baby 24/7, and she is a sweetie. It's hell having a stepfamily, but 1000% better than a loveless marriage ↑ |
| Name: pj754 | Date: Sep 23rd, 2006 9:20 PM |
| Hi Meg--For 12 years, I was married to a complete jerk. He is mind controlling and feels the laws are made to just piss him off. It got to the point that I hated the person I was becoming, angry all the time and always telling the children no. Finally, I decided to divorce but was seeing another man on the side, who has helped me every step of the way. I ended up marrying the other man, who my ex hates. He hates the fact that his cushy little life was disrupted by someone else. I was very determined to do things on my own but my new husband stepped in to help. He knew I could do things on my own but also knew, I needed to be with my children. They are my life. Oh, we have our ups and downs with the ex. I'm sure we will be in and out of court so many times until my youngest turns 18, who is only 7. Oh, boy, what a long haul. However, my ex gets more visitation time because the judge punished me for not letting see the children for a month because I had nothing in writing to state he would bring them back home to me. This jerk lives in the same school district as I do and parades around like he is Disneyland Dad. Which is ok with me but it makes him look completely stupid. He thinks he's can always get the best of me and yet I don't give him the satisfaction. I've tried the reasonable communication thing with him but this jerk is just plain unreasonable and selfish. It will turn around and bite him in the butt down the road. I just want to let you know, I hear your pain. I'm living it along with alot of us. Staying positive is the only avenue you can take. Keep your head up high. Sure, we all make mistakes, who doesn't. At least you recognize what needs to be changed and your doing it. Hats off to you!!! You have a precious child that you can focus alot of your energy on. As for men, some of such snakes. You'll know in your heart, who is the right one for you. It just takes time and patience. Sometimes, I question my 2nd husband's actions because of how my 1st husband treated me. My new husband laughs because he knows what I've gone through. He is very cooperative with a lot of things. Don't let your ex get the best of you no matter how hard he tries. Believe me he will try. Stand your ground. I just thought I would share this bit with you because you are not alone. Thanks for listening. ↑ |
| Name: Meg | Date: Sep 25th, 2006 1:43 PM |
| Thanks PJ and step mom.....I'm having a really hard time maintaining a good healthy relationship with my boyfriend... It's hard with my little one cuz she consumes and deserves most of my energy.... How can I build a strong relationship with another man when I have little energy left or I feel as if I have nothing left to give at the end of the day? Someone please tell me how they're doing it?? ↑ |
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