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Name: sunnee
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Name: Stepmommy4lif | Date: Jan 15th, 2011 5:21 AM
Well Ladies! This whole custody court crap is OVER (Thank God). The investigation went well and the CFI report actually stated that "SHE" was too controling and needed to accept that I am in the boys lives, and that they love me. So I was glad that a complete stranger saw right through her ass! So 6 months later & $5,000 later in lawyer fees we are back to square one, with a new parenting plan. O i forgot to mention that now my husband is forced/court ordered to go to parenting classes with her together for 1 month all because HER ass is the one that has the problem. He is Pissed! The classes wont change nothing because until she changes and accepts (OUR marriage) things will never change. All I can say ladies is keep loving the kids, she tries so hard to get in the way of my relationsship with my boys, but I WONT let her. It's not their fault their mother is a jackass!! I still have my restraining order against her so that helps because her ass can't come within 150 yards from me! Keep your heads up Ladies and pray that God will fight THIS battle, cause bitter ex-wives are NOT WORTH BREAKING UP YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR MAN! Night Ladies 

Name: Sylvia | Date: Jan 20th, 2011 5:19 PM
Hi Sunnee,I can relate to you because my situation is similar to yours.I am living with my partner and he has 3 daughters,whome he loves and dotes on very much.He also has a very vindictive ex wife who hates me and is always conniving and uses the girls as pawns to get her own way or to seek havoc in our lives.My kids are adults ,because I was a very young mother and my boyfriend had kids late in life.We are almost two years living together,still no divorce because the custody issue isnt settled yet ,thousands of dollars in the hole and he pays out 900 a month and we have the girls three weekends from Friday to Monday evening .So it can be expensive ,and she still has all the say.She spends most of the weekends parked in our driveway taking the girls to here and there.She got religious after they split up and takes them to Sunday school and church.She says alot of stuff to these girls about thier dad,how he dont love them because he left.He is a very good dad,and would do anything for his children.I get along great with them ,one of them is bit loyal to her mother but still I know that in time that will work itself out.There is no win situation here,especially where kids are involved and ex spouses are revengeful and bitter.I wonder sometimes why I got myself into this mess,but he is a wonderful man ,treats me well and loyal and dependable.My only wish is that he would stand up more to his ex,and now even the girls are starting to mimic thier mother in getting things from him and it kills me to see them treat thier dad that way.He cant see it but I can,so Sunnee I dont think there is anything thta you can do and you have lots of people in the same boat as you ..me for one..LOL.
Take care and add me to your facebook if u got [email protected] 

Name: Seestar | Date: Feb 8th, 2011 11:23 PM
Parental alienation. This is what his ex wife is doing. Check it out online. It may help you figure out how to deal with things. 

Name: jennifer | Date: Feb 14th, 2011 5:50 PM
omg..that sounds soooo true..i'm going through the exact same thing....we are not married..but live together..his kids are good kids n they love me n i love them..but his ex is so jealous that the kids love me..she has started to insult me infront of them n herm mother does the same..i have never his ex or her family..i don't feel the need too..she just ticks me off on how she uses the kids against their father..she as remarried n has a new life..but the kids father isn't aloud too..he is suppose to jump when she calls. she ended the marriage but still wants her ex as the father but wants another man as hers..my man isn't aloud to be happy or start a new life ..i'm trying to help him build a new life so his kids will be happy visiting him..the kids are very happy for their dad..but his ex isn't n doesn't think he loves his kids or in an active father..i just don't know what to do??? can someone help??? please 

Name: AE | Date: Mar 23rd, 2011 8:02 PM
After reading all these replies I can not believe how many other women are in this position. I met the man of my dreams almost three years ago. He came into the relationship with two children from a previous relationship. I had lost my son due to SIDS earlier in the year and was just starting to come around and ready to start dating. He had hid the relationship from his ex for awhile, which bothered me to no end. One evening, he called me and said, "my ex just asked for me back, and I said no and told her about us, and how I love you". I explained to him that I respect she is the mother of his children and if he wanted to make it work, I would gladly back away. He said he wanted to be with me, told her that, and that was that. After that, everything turned worse. She would call 3 to 4 times a week to beg for money, diapers, food, rides to places. She would call and threaten that she was moving to another province with the children. He had set boundaries stating it was not okay for her to call, and only to call in case of an emergency. We moved away for awhile, as she had started to harass me and my family, and my boyfriend was on the verge of losing his job due to her constant calling him at work. She would not let him see the children, even though they had a court order. We moved back to be able to see the children. Once we moved back she started everything all over again, only ten times worse! She would fight infront of the children, she would threaten to take him to court, and send him emails stating how the girls had another man in their life they called dad and where happy and didn't need him! (Mind you his children and 3&4) We had our first daughter together, and she lost her mind. She actually said to my face 'I hope your daughter dies, just like your son did"
Women like this are terribly jealous and insecure. They use their children as pawns, and are terrified that they will lose there children. However this is not the case. I never speak ill of their mother, I love his children and they love me, and they still love their mother. We have tried to have a relationship with the children's mother, but lasted only a month. The ex's never change, its you that needs to accept it and move on. I have dealt with my share of crazy, however with my hubby to be setting proper boundaries, and now picking up the children through a mutual friend makes our life much easier! I encourage the girls to talk nicely about their mother when they are here, and I love to he stories of their activities there. I have a daughter of my own, and I would never want to put her in such a hostile environment. My mother never once talked ill of my absent father, and still to this day does not. 

Name: love kids | Date: Mar 23rd, 2011 10:11 PM
Check to see her brain function. It sound like maybe abuse. maybe she reelly crazy. make sure for sake of childs growing up. Children need more than drill sargent for parent. Her mouth also too big and mean. 

Name: chi | Date: Mar 25th, 2011 10:58 PM
She need some doctor to slow down activity in her brain. 5 activity too much for kids. ThEy need rest and so do kids mom. Sound like nazi concentration camp at moms house. She need take nice pill. Maybe too mean to get new man. She need valuable lesson. She overstep her boundaries and privelegdes and think money grow on trees. She need to have kids taken away to learn her place in life. 

Name: Denise | Date: Mar 30th, 2011 1:05 AM
Reading this post hit home!
First his ex will not allow me come to any special events. Thise past week was his son 14th birthday and the three of them went out to dinner and husband didn't have the guts to say anything and didn't take into conderration my feelings on the matter. When its my kids birhtday or any other event his comes along with my ex. I do understand its about the kids but is it really that way with her or is it a control issue does he still love her or just doesn't want to piss her off. She left him for another man and on the third marrirage and not happy. I wish I had adive for you but do know you are not alone. 

Name: Djean | Date: May 29th, 2011 4:02 PM
Walk away fast 

Name: carolko | Date: Sep 6th, 2011 3:49 PM
Spiteful... bitter... they are out there and there is no getting around them I'm afraid.

Name: Pairick | Date: Sep 10th, 2011 7:26 AM
OMG!!! I am so excited that I found this sight and have received very good information on how to handle my own situation! My mans ex try's to control every aspect of what the kids do when he has his parenting time. She has also accused me of doing drugs and questions every scratch that the kids get when they come over to our house. Even though they come over to our house with bruises all the time( just normal kid bruises)! His time is very limited with his kids because he signed the divorce papers because he didn't want a long drawn out battle. We are now seeking more parenting time and we are both concerned of what she will lie about to not let him get more parenting time! Child services were called at some point because I think someone on her side told the oldest that we hit him. Of course CSD found them greatly false accusations because I was documenting all the catty things that she was doing. He only gets them one weekend out of the month not the normal every other weekend( which we are trying to change now) and she calls constantly to talk to the kids and it's disruptive because we take one weekend out of the month to do special things with all of our kids and she signs them up for things that don't get over til 1 in the afternoon so we have to wait to get our day started on the only weekend we have with them. Every time they leave it's like an interrogation and he has to answer all these teadious texts from her when they leave. I mean stupid questions... Like did they eat? Um hello he's six ask him!!! I feel once we get the more parenting time ( which I see no reasons why he wouldn't) then he doesn't have to kiss her ass anymore! He has to answer etc because he is always hopeful to get more time with the children but there ia always an excuse as to why he can't! Fingers crossed! Hopefully I will have good news in the next few months 

Name: Susan | Date: Sep 27th, 2011 1:30 PM
My suggestion....do not marry him. I am a second wife fo my husband and his ex-wife has made our life hell - if she is already starting out that way, she will only get worse. In the end it will put a wedge between you and your husband and cause resentment between the two of you and neither of you will be happy. I would again never marry a man with children whose mother was still living. 

Name: mrs.stewart | Date: Dec 12th, 2011 11:22 PM
i see i belong in here im going to scream if my husbands ex calls or facebooks us one more time we just got married and while on my hunny moon she blew our phne up i have kids so need my phne on at all times so yeah not a very great honymoon now she found out we are moveing to germany and lok out shes cant stop from calln me names even though she cheated on him while he was over seas oh yeah did i mention he is airforce and she realy did do it all no joke my husband is so kind and sweet and passive omg eeeeee i love him so but she took him for granted in a very bad way and now shes haten life 

Name: hated 2nd wife | Date: Dec 17th, 2011 3:45 PM
I pitty you! I thought things would get better once we were married. My husband continues to jump when his ex wife says jump at the expense of his new family. I am so miserable I have contacted a lawyer to begin divorce proceedings. I am not going to play 2nd fiddle to his spiteful ex wife. If he can't answer to his current wife, then he's not the one for me. I told him he needs to go back to his first wife. Please consider if you want a life of him always pleasing his ex wife and you being upset before you marry him. I was stupid to marry my husband and am going to have to pay a pretty price to fix this mistake! 

Name: moe | Date: Dec 21st, 2011 9:39 PM
on my website I have the top 10 reasons why second marriages fail- you and your boyfriend need to read it. www.cybercounselingcenter.com 

Name: Nikki | Date: Jan 28th, 2012 12:05 AM
My advise is back off, let the mother learn her own lessons (if any indeed she has lessons to learn), love your partner and stop criticizing her. We all have our shortcomings and no doubt she is doing the best job she can. If she criticizes you or your boyfriend - ignore it. That will stop when she feels acknowledged, supported and trusted by someone (either herself or someone else). Don't engage in the drama and work on yourself. 

Name: J | Date: Jun 4th, 2012 10:02 AM
My husbands ex wife has been causing problems for 7 years now.. It's been hell, we have been married for five years now and from day one I have said I want out! At first it was she was still in love with him even after three of divorce, but now it's just revenge. He still has five more years until his youngest will graduate and five more years of dealing with someone that thinks she can control his life and mine because of kids! I would never marry anyone again with a ex wife and kids under the age of 18! Things never get better only worse, if you love him enough to stick it out the the future will be bright, if the problems are causing so much stress on you and your relationship, you both may need to seek counseling, that is my next step before I call it quits!! 

Name: Karen | Date: Jun 10th, 2012 11:45 PM
Oh man I am dealing with the exact thing!!! We just got married last month and deal with.... Me and my kids mean more to him than his kids do.. We have custody and still are stuck paying child support and non stop orders from her what to buy what to do etc! She manipulates and brain washes the kids it's so frustrating!! She's a major alcoholic and in and out of rehab!! It's a nightmare dealing with her and all her drama!! 

Name: feix | Date: Dec 22nd, 2013 12:57 PM
My exwife ask for some favors sometime I do them sometimes I don't but she started to lye again and manipulating me again like Dhabi and oily t make me so angry and she use the kids as well I have custody of the kids don't pay me child support but she always go shopping every time she haves money will somebody have any advice 

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