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Name: Cheryl
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Name: Dana | Date: Jul 3rd, 2007 5:03 PM
Take it from someone who has been there done that. As long as they have kids together....she'll NEVER GO AWAY. Nor should you expect her to. I had to come to that relization myself when I started seeing a guy who has two beautiful children by another woman. It drove me nuts at first. This woman is trully crazy. Classic control issues and refused (and still refuses) months later to MOVE ON. I had to decide if this guy and his babies, whom I also love, was worth the headache that is the dreaded X. Thats what you are going to have to decide as well. If you find you can't take it anymore my advice is next time you get involved with a man....try to find one who doesn't have children with another woman. 

Name: hisangel | Date: Jul 4th, 2007 3:10 AM
How old are the kids? 

Name: sick of the ex | Date: Jul 9th, 2007 7:53 PM
Try acting as if your ok with it and how mature you think she is by handling things this way. Once she realizes that it doesn't bother (even though it's killing you inside) you at all she may stop. 

Name: naveen | Date: Jul 17th, 2007 7:35 AM

Name: Beenthere | Date: Jul 21st, 2007 2:17 PM
I think it is the ex-wife's responsibility to teach her children that their father matters and assist them in buying a gift. Be gracious and don't involve the children. Tell the children how wonderful they are to think about their father and let it go. From my own experience...you would just be playing her game if you continue to get mad 

Name: miss Ang | Date: Jul 23rd, 2007 3:42 AM
Same problem here sweetie! Honestly I have tried everything and I have went as far as antidepressants! Then I realized that all she was doing was starting S**t So I did what any red blooded american woman would do. I beat her a**. And spent overnight in jail BUT let me tell ya I feel like a million bucks. I dont know how bad your EX is But the one that I have to deal with is totally LUCIFER.(the devil) And to cover myself with the kids because they know how much she likes to start crap, I just say OMG what a liar. I have never touched your mother. HEE HEE HEE . And I promise I really do feel good now. 

Name: bluenight | Date: Jul 27th, 2007 5:00 AM
keep them and give them back to her husabnd for the same occassion she will quit sending them then 

Name: CHELEA | Date: Aug 15th, 2007 9:21 PM

Name: cinner29 | Date: Aug 20th, 2007 2:59 PM
I suppose this is an old post...but here are my thoughts on this post:

If he has children from his first marriage with her then she has every right to take them out to buy him a fathers day present....as long as it is from them and not her.......as long as they have children together ( which is always) then she can take them out to buy your husband a gift if she wants to. My husbands ex-wife did not acknowledge fathers day for almost 3 years when they divorced........maybe you should think about how much that can hurt before you start complaining that your husband's exwife is helping her own children to send their dad a gift! 

Name: irish Amy | Date: Aug 22nd, 2007 12:07 AM
Cinner29, I dont want to start a fan club or anything for you but it is so refreshing to read your comments on situations like this, I too got involved with someone who had an ex and kids, i listened while he blamed her for everything, wanting to take his money his life etc etc, I eventually said enough is enough, there were two of you in that relationship, two of you to make or two of you to break it, and i asked him if we ever found ourselves broken up with kids would he be saying the same about me?? suffice to say we did break up years and two children later, and i have no doubt that the same IS being said about me even though he does not support his children at all, have no contact ( his choice ) and blames me for everything !! Because of the children involved I am on quite good terms with his first ex, not best friends but send photos, xmas cards etc so we have abseloutly no annomosity between us at all and never did, the way I look at it is I didnt know the woman and she didnt know me, two very differnt people whos lives just happened to intertwine, so now being on the other side of the fence ( as the ex ) I just dont understand these women who have to down the ex's at every oppertunity just to convince themselves that because he may slag her off for what may have been shortcomings on his behalf as well as hers, that he must love Her more, that she is a nothing, she should not keep his name, she should get off her lazy ass and help them out to support the kids cos SHE wants kids of their own, but he did love her at one time and they did have a family together, I also thought this when I was the ''new'' girl!!!!! . So my point is Cinner29 that it is refreshing to read your realistic comments and that you dont just jump on the wicked, evil ex bandwagon as I never did all those years ago, 

Name: irish Amy | Date: Aug 22nd, 2007 12:23 AM
Also, to everybody, the ex does deserve some degree of respect if as the mother of his children is the only reason then so be it cos even if the dad is supporting the kids it usually is the mum who is bringing them up and dealing with all of lifes day to day things and for those of you with children you will know excatly what that entails and that it is not always easy in fact it can be DAMN HARD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Name: cinner29 | Date: Aug 22nd, 2007 3:21 PM
Amy....LOL, about the fan club......wait could we all wear badges!!! LOL......anyways I only comment in here once in a while....I am mostly in SAHM......I hope to talk to you again soon! 

Name: duchess | Date: Aug 23rd, 2007 2:00 AM
Well you could drop the kids a hint about things you both would like. Or step back and say nothing and let her play her game. You know that is what she is doing. And so does your husband. I mean is it really big of a deal? You can buy things yourself and he knows who bought what. I think I might tell her thank you personally, and mention how much YOU enjoyed whatever it is. And as far as narcisstic...... I think you right. My fiance's ex is so much that way I told him she should get a personlized license plate for her car that reads IMeMine. 

Name: autumn_leaves | Date: Oct 14th, 2007 9:37 PM
She's using her kids to cause trouble. She wants you to be upset by buying gifts for your husband. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see the gifts are a "f*ck you" toward you and not from the kids. However, turn it around on her. MAKE it about the kids, and really thank them, hug them, tell them how proud you are they picked out such wonderful things for their Daddy. Support THEIR jesture, take her out of the picture. When u think of it this way, it's nice to see some of his child support coming back to him!!! LOL 

Name: irish Amy | Date: Oct 14th, 2007 10:16 PM
jesus, such crap, maybe the kids are too young to pick out the gifts and she's just trying to help, has antbodt thought of that?? 

Name: irish Amy | Date: Oct 14th, 2007 10:16 PM
** has any body thought of that** 

Name: Samantha | Date: Oct 15th, 2007 12:08 AM
It makes sense that some of you might get annoyed if you are an ex-wife and trying to do the right thing for your kids.... no disrespect intented to you. However, it just seems like the ex-wife in her story is having issues with her ex-husband's current situation (since it's a recent behavior) and using her kids as a means to assert her presence. It makes sense that she would feel threatened by the fact that his new wife just had a baby. She probably feels her role as the mother of his children is being threatened. I bet she feels like she may be displaced permanently now that he has chosen to have children with you. Perhaps that he may even prefer you to take over with mothering her children as well. Maybe deal with it in a more positive way. Let her know that although you are the current wife and mother of his newborn she should remain secure about the fact that she is the mother of his other children. You are all responsible for the well-being of the children now so it would obviously be best to work together. Maybe she will feel more secure and hopefully end up focusing on her own happiness with her new situation (new husband, etc) instead of getting all weird about yours. Everybody's energy really should be re-focused so that it creates a more positive environment for all of your children. It's in your best interest to be on decent terms with the ex-wife since your child is half-siblings with her children. 

Name: Z | Date: Nov 5th, 2007 4:28 AM
When my husband and I 1st separated I would take the kids to buy him gifts for xmas, b'day etc. He'd opened them and just leave them at our house. It really p*ssed me off. So, the kids are older. I tell them it's his bday, they can make a picture 4 him. They take it to his house. If he doesn't want them fine. He can give them away or toss them. If it helps the kids stay connected who cares? 

Name: Beth | Date: Nov 16th, 2007 2:39 PM
This is an awkward situation. I have an ex with whom I have two kids. I always took them shopping to get him gifts from them for Christmas, Birthday, Fathers Day. Then he got a weird girlfriend who had a problem with that. So, per his request, I stopped. Then, he got married to yet another woman, and she would take the kids shopping. Now he is getting divorced and telling the kids what he wants for Christmas. I have a problem going out buying him gifts, but I want to do what is right with the kids. They are now 12 and 13, and I told them to ask him for some money so they can go shopping for him, but they are so afraid of him they won't do that. So, now I can either just take them and get him something from them, and they will be happy and in their eyes some day I will look like the "good Mom" or I can be realistic and tell them that that is his job, if he wants something, take them out, give them some money and let them get him something while he isn't looking. I don't know what is right or wrong. The original thread states the ex buys gifts for her kids to give to their father, why is that a BAD thing? 

Name: OnMyWayOut | Date: Nov 17th, 2007 2:29 AM
In the 15 years since my boyfriend's divorce, the only thing his ex has helped their daughter buy for him is a coffee pot (he already had one). His child support is more than my first mortgage and car payment put together.

His daughter is now 16, with a driver's license and a car. She works and he also sends her money. He can count the number of cards he's received.

I'd love it if his ex-wife would have helped develop a generous spirit. 

Name: Missy | Date: Dec 11th, 2007 8:13 AM
I have 2 children, both from seperate relationships in my 20's. For 5 years I've been married to a man but we can not have children together. He loves my children, and we all get along with both fathers of my kids. Why not? We did have children together, and should be respectful and decent to each other. We all like to give a gift around Christmas, and any occassion. When the kids were little their dad's helped with Mother's Day presents too. Can you believe that my husband just gave a nice food dehydrator to my daughter's father for Christmas? We need to all get along and realize that even if we aren't together we can be nice to each other. We need to respect each other for bringing these beautiful children in the world together, and keep them happy and loved. Enough negative fighting over nothing! My kids are now 14 and 18. They are the most positive, productive, caring and loving human beings you would ever meet. You can give a gift to a coworker or neighbor..but not the mother or father of your child? Why? Can't we all just get along? 

Name: babs | Date: Dec 13th, 2007 1:39 PM
i understand what you are going through my husbands ex is the same , she just wants 2 get a grip and grow up i have been married 2 my hunni 4 seven yrs with 3 kids the ex has 1 child 2 my husband , but she is know maken up lies witch is maken myself and my husband argue i really dont want this cumming between us i just dont know what 2 do anymore, 

Name: the devil | Date: Dec 13th, 2007 1:47 PM
thats what my husbands ex is turning me in 2 i hate her sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much the funny thing is she is re married witha son she just wants her cake and eat it well i hope she bloody chocks on it lol .......... 

Name: helpermom | Date: Dec 14th, 2007 1:21 AM
I've already gone through this "stage" with my husband's ex-wife. I choose to just ignore her and to encourage the kids to ge their Dad as many things as possible. I actually didn't take them shopping, like she did, but helped them make things for him and this gave us good time together also. All I can say is...hopefully his ex will get another 'thing' to focus on and move on. In the meantime, thank her for the gifts. She will not get any enjoyment out of making you happier and she will stop. It's not hurting the kids in any way and that's what's really important. Also, I hate to tell you this, but her buying gifts will probably be a very small problem caused by her. Wait until you have teens and this woman to deal with at the same time. Sorry...some people don't get better but we are all wishing you the best of luck. Just let them know you care about them and hopefully they will see her true colors on their own. 

Name: Sally | Date: Dec 21st, 2007 4:10 PM
I know what you mean. My husband's ex-wife just sent a Christmas package. The gifts were supposed to be from my husband's 10-year-old to his father. The gifts were kitchen items and house-related. It felt like a direct insult from his ex. My husband's ex is a narcissist. She doesn't let the young son talk to his dad except on rare ocassions, and visitation is once a year in the summer. She tells the boy that his step mother is evil and will kill him. My husband and his ex have 3 other adult children. One child is totally cast out of her mother's life. The other 2 adult children worship their mother and have next to no communication with their father since we married. All I can say is pray for all of us in this type of situation! 

Name: Symantha | Date: Jan 7th, 2008 6:08 PM
She probably sees that its upsetting the two of you and thats what she wants. Its sad she is using the kids to get a reaction but some people are crazy like that. Im in somewhat the same situation with a crazy ex doing weird things to get a reaction. It took alot out of me to "ignore" her but it seems to be working. You know your husband isnt happy with it... the two of you are on the same page. Thats a good thing. Just try to not let the children see you are upset. They are smarter then you think. Good Luck! 

Name: jake | Date: Jan 7th, 2008 7:01 PM
hi i am jake i am 10 year i need some love 

Name: Scott | Date: Jan 11th, 2008 3:20 AM
She sounds like a nut. Well I guess you already know that. I would suggest that you post naked pics of her fat ass on crazyexwves.com I hope you are and your husband are not porviding nay money to fuel the crazyness. 

Name: gina | Date: Jan 21st, 2008 6:45 AM
you can't make her stop... those are thier kids and if she wants to do that.. them let her... Grow up and be a bigger woman than she is.. you seem very insecure and jealous. 

Name: Mike Paahana | Date: Jan 23rd, 2008 1:41 AM
my ex is great she good 2 me an the kids was stress b4 but now all g my gf no like my ex but i think i going chose soon 

Name: sketch | Date: Jan 27th, 2008 7:04 PM
my exwife has the same condition.. get a hitman.only way u will have peace 

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