Where to start - I'm with a man who I have a 15 yr history with, on and off since we are kids. Well within our on and off stages he slipped in 2 marriages and between the 2 has 3 kids (1 with the first wife 2 with the 2nd) The first wife and his son are stationed in Japan so he doesn't get to see him. The second wife and his kids live in another state. The marriage failed for many reason, he stuck in it to be with his kids, she cheated and ended the marriage (short version).
Well now we've been together for a year. She got the divorce papers written up he signed them and mailed them back and now she doesn't want to turn them in. She has a boyfriend (the same guy she cheated with) and my boyfriend is fine with that (not fine with his kids spending time with another man but dealing with it well enough).
Here's my issue, she calls 2,3,4 times a day about things that have nothing to do with the kids. If he doesn't entertain it, then she doesn't let him talk to the kids. She's told him she misses him, she wishes things didn't go the way they did, she even went so far to say that she hooked up with the guy for the kids thinking he would clear up any money issues and he would support them (great excuse to cheat on your family). She cries to him when he doesn't give her attention over the phone, she cries to him when her back hurts - and he entertains it, again if he doesn't he can't talk to the kids, I've seen it happen several times.
Well now he's planning a trip to see the kids last minute. I offered to make these plans 3 months ago and offered to pay for her ticket (I get along fine with her b/c she's nice to me then stabs me in the back when talking to him, but that's ok) but she let to much time lapse and the tickets were to expensive. Now his friend is giving him a ticket and the ex is going to pay for the hotel room and lend him her car - he has to drive her to work pick her up from work AND they will go out to dinner the while he's there so she can 'help out' being he's low on money.
Am I crazy for not agreeing with this and being concerned? He tells me he would never leave me and he doesn't want to be with her, but actions speak louder then words. He attends to her ever need over the phone, what's going to stop that in person? I don't want to be the girl who makes him not see his kids, I think they are amazing and enjoy whatever time I do spend with them. Also, the kids don't know they parents are separated, they think daddy is living with a friend (me) and mommy has a friend visit her (the boyfriend).
Am I wrong by feeling uncomfortable with this and him and the ex being a family for week? I know how much he misses his children and being in this situation is really hard on him. I'm so confused. ↓
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