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Name: claire
[ Original Post ]
i need help i live with my partner of 6 years, we argue all the time and were both really misrable. i own my proerty, but when i ask him to leave he wont go, so it becomes a vicious circle. we argue,i threaten to kick him out, we then make up and he stays. i no it would be best for him to go, but i dont no what to do my head says just plod on but my heart says get rid, if anyone understands please help im in termoil. thankyou
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Name: in your shoes | Date: Nov 22nd, 2005 2:16 PM
I ma in your shoes too clair except he owns the house we live in. If I was able to kick him out I would. Fighting all the time is so draining and just brings us down. We do the same.. fight horribly then he makes up with me its almost like mental abuse. SO, if I were you I'd do whatever I could to get him out and try to regain my happiness. good luck 

Name: ally | Date: Dec 17th, 2005 1:57 AM
just go to the police and say that his kicking you and stuff like that and put him in jail.
love ally 

Name: tb | Date: Dec 19th, 2005 12:26 PM
Hi Ally, The answer is not to have a innocent person thrown in jail for a crime they didn't commit. That will just make the situation worse. I hope that's not the way you think you can get rid of people, because you will have a rough road ahead of you. 

Name: tb | Date: Dec 19th, 2005 12:35 PM
Hi Claire, It's a very hard decision to make. It's not worth staying in the relationship to fight all time. Everytime you kick him out and let him back in, the more he thinks he can get away with because they are just threats. He doesn't believe you really want him to move out. You need to stick to your word the next time you ask him to leave. Tghat the only way he going to realize your serious. Good luck and be strong. 

Name: BIANCA | Date: Jan 5th, 2006 3:07 AM
follow your heart. 

Name: Lynne n | Date: May 12th, 2006 9:10 PM
Hi i have the same problem as you i dont own my flat but it is my name on the rent book when i ask him to go he just says that as i dont work(We have a baby of 21 months i saty at home with him) i wont be able to afford it on my own,one day i will prove him wrong!
I think the only way i will get him out is to change the locks when he is at work and put his clothes outside the door,i dont want to have to go to those lengths but i think that,that is what it is going to take! 


Name: Serina to Clair | Date: May 12th, 2006 9:21 PM
Get him off your propety. It is your right in 1 more year you will be legally considered married and will not be able to kick him out.In most States this is the case it is called commen law marriage. if he will not go on his own steam call the cops and have him removed .Please be safe and listen to your head not you heart . Can you see yourself with this guy arguing for the rest of your life ??? I bet not!!!
Becareful or he will get half of everything!!!
I hope you have peace and your property! Good luck &
God bless!!! 

Name: Mel | Date: May 19th, 2006 11:57 PM
Have you gotten him out yet?? 

Name: Fiona | Date: May 28th, 2006 10:37 PM
Change the locks and throw all his stuff out of the windows. Preferably so it hits his head!

I was in your position a few years ago and I ended up threatening him with court. He left eventually, but it was hard.

Make up your mind and just do it. Don't make up with him. He's just using you!!!! If you don't get rid of him he will end up with rights to your house and he'll fleece you out of money. 

Name: cathy | Date: Jun 24th, 2006 9:58 AM
Hi, I have two beautiful kids but my partner of 6 yrs is a binge drinker, last week I found him asleep in the garden with all the doors open in the middle of the night, we live in london where security is only common sense, anyone could have come in and taken or murdered my children in their beds.I want him out but I know he wont go.There is no talking to him and although not physically abusive he can be verbally.This is not the first time, its not going to change is it? 

Name: Tyhisha | Date: Jun 23rd, 2007 12:20 PM
I understand Deeply what you are sayin. but my situation is a little different. I OWN my house . I recently came to the conclusion that hes cheating on me. How i know. Just my gut} And you know what that mean. I feel it. Things arent the same. I ask him to leave and to give me my key back. But he refuses. Hes not helping i just want out. Im too old for this. Ummmmm I actually thought i would be able to get advice from you . but hopefully you can use this information. I dont know} 

Name: twinters | Date: Jun 29th, 2007 6:44 PM
Just do what you feel you need to do! I was there! We had 4 children together and I wanted him to leave, he wouldn't because he always told me it was his house. I was scared to death at being a single mom of 4 but once I did it I felt much better! I know know I can do it on my own. BTW I am a stay at home mom that is now in school full time (which he is court ordered to pay for!) 

Name: sophie | Date: Jul 3rd, 2007 1:08 AM
i no how it feels...i no u mite think this is strange but say if you wont leave i will break up say it in a nice tone and b4 any1 is shouting and b4 u say go home just say it while your having a normal chatand if that fails ask him why hes doing this and his home life and family cause it mite not be u why hes angry/annoying its good to talk 

Name: Maria | Date: Dec 3rd, 2007 12:52 AM
I am in the same situtation, I am stuck & need help to. He is the father of my kids & onw on the way. The apartment is in my name, aswell as all the bills. I work full time he works when he has a job available 1 2 3 4 days a week not steady at all. He is a good guy calm, does not like to yell fight etc. but me being pregnant is hard cause I think it might be my hormones taking control. But then I am in a financial burden I pay all the rent well most the bills & he helps out with what ever he can & as a father of my kids I do not think that is right. We are not married but it still should be the same thing, cause if we were married a husband is suppose to provide not give money when he can. So I have given him till the end of Nov 07 to give me all the money he owes me (rent only not other bills) & he did not. I have told him that he needs to leave cause I can't do this anymore & to respect that. But he will not cause I have tried before & he still came as he pleases. My next step is to involed my parents or his family. I will update later. Thanks. 

Name: maria77qt | Date: Dec 3rd, 2007 1:00 AM
(REPEAT SORRY I JUST REGISTERED) I am in the same situtation, I am stuck & need help to. He is the father of my kids & onw on the way. The apartment is in my name, aswell as all the bills. I work full time he works when he has a job available 1 2 3 4 days a week not steady at all. He is a good guy calm, does not like to yell fight etc. but me being pregnant is hard cause I think it might be my hormones taking control. But then I am in a financial burden I pay all the rent well most the bills & he helps out with what ever he can & as a father of my kids I do not think that is right. We are not married but it still should be the same thing, cause if we were married a husband is suppose to provide not give money when he can. So I have given him till the end of Nov 07 to give me all the money he owes me (rent only not other bills) & he did not. I have told him that he needs to leave cause I can't do this anymore & to respect that. But he will not cause I have tried before & he still came as he pleases. My next step is to involed my parents or his family. I will update later. Thanks. 

Name: monica | Date: May 31st, 2008 4:43 AM
i am in the same situation, my husband is no good for me or my kids, he is on drugs(weed) so he does not think it is serious and me i am trying to set a positive exaple and i do not know how to with him round displaying negative behaviors. he also stay out all night and acts as if i am tripping when i ask him what is goin on. i know he needs to go. i tell him he will not leave, what am i to do i have 3 kids and bad credit i can pay the bills but never get into a new place he needs to leave what should i do 

Name: kate | Date: Jan 5th, 2009 5:40 AM
Hi, I've been married for 23 years my husband has been texting a girl half his age for the last 8 months, I've asked him to stop but he even went out and got a secret phone just to keep texting her. I feel betrayed and alone and want him out of my life. he keeps ringing and texting saying he's sorry but I've heard it all before. what should i do? 

Name: gypsey | Date: Feb 15th, 2009 3:22 AM
CALL THE POLICE AND GET HIM OUT OF YOUR LIFE YOU DONT NEED HIM 

Name: sarah | Date: Dec 19th, 2009 8:41 PM
hiya i have question if your husband is in the rent book in the house he can throw you out if he want 

Name: swf | Date: Feb 2nd, 2010 1:48 AM
i think you have to simply be apathetic as long as you can. there will always be something about someone that you'll have to learn to accept or tolerate. make the stuation at least as liveable as possible. don't get violent and don't call the cops. 

Name: LYNN | Date: Apr 15th, 2010 3:43 PM
I AM IN THE SAME SITUATION. I WAS SINGLE FOR YEARS BEFORE I MET THE GUY I AM WITH NOW. AT FIRST IT WAS GREAT, NOW IT'S REALLY STARTING TO GET ON MY NERVES. I CAN'T EVEN GO TO THE BATHROOM IN PEACE, AND WHEN I SAY TO HIM THAT I DON'T WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP ANYMORE, HE LATCHES ON THAT MUCH MORE. 

Name: charley | Date: Apr 22nd, 2010 8:34 AM
I am in the same situation only we have a child together i dont know what to do 

Name: charley | Date: Apr 22nd, 2010 8:53 AM
i have also been with my partner for 6 years we have a 4 year old child together who is disabeld my partner never helps me out with our son and i am constantly argueing with him about this i have told him i want he to leave so many times but he wont i say that i dont want to be with him anymore yet he just wont leave i feel that he is mentally abuseing me I am so depressed i just dont no what to do i couldnt change the locks when his at work as he would just break the door down he wont even so much as change our sons nappy in the whole 4 years he has probably changed him 3 maybe 4 times tops he never gets up with him in the morning and never looks after him for me to have a break and my mum is now refuseing to look after my son as she said to me yesterday i should put my foot down when my son woke up this morning i refused to get up an he phyically kicked me out of the bed i got back in an he turned very violent but never actually hit me he grabbed me by my throat i was obviously very upset i admit i punched him in the face the throw me on the bed an tipped the bed over he banged my head on the wall i have bruises all over me i want him out when we fight usually im the one that usually makes up this time he tryed to say sorry and i just said i dont want your appolygees i really dont no what to do please help!! Its best for me and my son if we just broke up 

Name: SHERREE | Date: Jul 21st, 2010 8:48 PM
I AM IN THE SAME SITUATION. I EVEN WROTE AN EVICTION NOTICE AND GAVE IT TO THE ASSHOLE, AND HE JUST LAUGHED. 

Name: Nellie | Date: Nov 18th, 2010 11:35 PM
God I am so in the same situation except we own the house together and have pets we both care about, but I hate him with a passion and am pretty sure he is not too keen on me but everytime I try to end it he goes into shutdown..help ! 

Name: Iris | Date: Oct 22nd, 2012 10:04 PM
Why is it that when we meet someone they are so kind,caring and loving? until one day they get irratated,everything is our fault they can not stand to talk to us? or even look at us? everything we say is wrong! i'm divorced,met this guy he moved in with me,lately we haven't been getting along, he packed his bags,moved the 4 wheeler but still sleeps in my room it is very strange. Everything I say and not argue it is like... "whatever" I asked how far is africa from alaska? he asked if I been online & found a b/f? looked at him & said I have two neices that left for africa/china with just a backpak they help other people out, things like that,then he wants to work in another town having to bite my tounge! just strange to have him in my house with out his clothes,empty shelves, I have been preparing my heart for the answer one day he will just get up and leave me, am I ready? no gotten attached to his love but can break free from the mental,verbal abuse no one needs to be treated like that. one day at a time. 

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