Hello, guest
Name: morgansmummy
[ Original Post ]
I have just discovered that my husband had been receiving and sending naughty emails to his ex wife before we were married.

My husband and I were childhood sweethearts, were broke up and went our seperate ways. He got married to a woman 10 years his senior who had children, they then had another child ( who is now 16) My husband and his ex wife were married for 14 years, she divorced him because he wasnt willing to look after her other children financially ( the other children being of working age) anyway we got connected again, and have had the most fantastic whirlwind relationship ending in marriage.
I have quite low self esteem it seems as i tend to think I dont deserve to be happy, which leads to my jealous side. I was being suspicious of my husband I think because a lot of relationships around me were failing I was getting scared. I hacked into his emails and discovered a folder of emails and photos from his ex wife the last one being sent in august last year when I was 6 months pregnant with our daughter we were not yet married ...we only got married this year, but we were living together, our relationship has always been fun and sex has always been exciting. I confronted my husband with the revaltion and he was at first shocked that I had hacked into his emails, which I appologised for but he said that he cant remember receiving them and doesn't know why he would have kept them.
There is so much I dont understand, why would he keep them, why was he corrasponding in that way with her, was I not fufilling his needs because I was pregnant. He assured me that nothing was going on then or now and that he loves me and doesnt want to lose me. His ex wife lives too far away for it to have been a physical relationship. So my question is how do I get over this. I have forgiven him but I'm having a very hard time understanding or forgetting, I dont know how to deal with this, I love him more than you could imagine he has given me evrything I have ever wanted in my life including my beautiful daughter. But how do I deal with this. HELP!!
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Name: ann | Date: Oct 30th, 2008 7:55 PM
I was in your shoes except my ex was calling a 900 # when I was married to him. If he did not get sex when he DEMANDed it he would threaten to sleep with a hooker!!! Your husband may not have been completely over his ex when the two of you got back together. And you having the baby may have been what bound you together. If it has stopped and you feel comfortable with trusting him now please do so, but I would not allow him to talk to her and I would make it if she emailed him I would be GONE. I personally would never trust him again but that is just who I am. If you love him and you are willing to work it out it is best for your daughter but don't let him cheat on you...emotional affairs do occur! You and his daughter are your life now and if he cannot accept the other marriage is done and over maybe it is time for you to move on too!! 

Name: Arian | Date: Feb 16th, 2011 6:53 PM
I am in the same boat. The last message I saw was her hinting that she 'needs a ride'. He obviously entertained it, but he deleted the string of messages like he always does so I will never know and it kills me. The low self esteem and feelings of worthlessness has me to scared to confront him as we've only been married 6 months. She sent him that message 3 months ago. I also do not have anywhere to go if he decided to leave me. I'm at such a loss. I love him so much, and every day, living with this knowledge, kills me. It has physically made me sick. I know how pathetic I sound, but I'm being honest. I dont know what to do. Help. 

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