so i just joined tumblr. Yay? Well here's my story. I'm a fresman In Highschool. In middle school I would always get picked on. People would always call me "ugly, fat & they told me to go lose some weight. At first I honestly didn't care. Then after 8th grade ear was over I decided to loose some weight I was put with a nutritionist.& I lost 30 pounds over summer. Then high school started. I kept on weighing myself. Everyday 158. 156 . 154. I was loosing weight! Amazing right?
Then A boy came. We texted, flirted & stuff . But at school he wouldn't even talk to me. I ask myself these questions everyday when I see him; "am I fat?" "am I ugly?" " am I not good enough for him? " " what's wrong with me? " then this monday I started making myself purge. I know it's not good & all but you don't need to tell me that because I know. Thing is I used to do it in 8th grade also. I was great over summer. Didn't even make myself puke once. This Monday I've gone back to it & honestly I just can't seem to stop obsessing over makin myself purge. Its like I'll eat & then 5 seconds will pass & I'll be in the bathroom with my fingers up my throat gagging. I don't know if it's just stress or the whole being a freshman thing but I just can't seem to control myself. I mean ill only eat a yogurt for lunch & then BAM I'll instantly think I'm back to where I started when I was in 8th grade I just need some advice can someone please help me? ↓