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Name: bethan6376
[ Original Post ]
my name is bethan. im 14 years old, 15 in november, and i don't know whether i have a problem, or if my mind is going funny on me. for the past 2 years, i've felt sick everytime i had a meal. whenever i ate anything that isn't fruit and veg, or in my mind, healthy. i have done, and still get a satisfaction from eating something that i consider healthy, such as lettuce, of an apple, or cabbage. even if i do not like the taste, i like to eat it, and fresh, fruit and veg are the only things really that don't make me feel sick after eating.

my friend is a vegetarian, but hasn't always been. she is lovely, and told me she was a vegetarian because whenever she ate meat, she would automatically throw up. i thought this may have been me, so i tried not eating meat for about 6 months. she was the only one who knew. about 6 months ago, i noticed it wasn't just the meat. it was all food with any fat in it, or processed. and then, as it progressed, most foods, healthy or not. i do not force myself to throw up, it just happens after i eat, it feels like my stomach has a sort of limit to it, the amount and type of food i eat, until it throws up, i do not, nor have i ever put anything down my throat to purposly throw up. i am very thin, but also very short, so my friends do not notice, and i cover it up with the clothes i wear. becasue of the throwing up, i feel sick whenever i eat most foods, so i hardly eat. i do consider myself obsessive, and am compfortable with my body looks, but i must admit, am always wanting o be that little smaller, so i can feel in control. it makes me feel safe to know i can control something about myself. and that i can control it to a very high limit. i do not throw up purposly, but i do "not eat" for days at a time becasue i want to be that little thinner. it makes me happy.

also, for the past year, i have been having short times, where my head feels very heavy, and i cant help but collapse, and wake up 5 minutes or so later. sometimes, it is just where i have to lie on the ground and let it pass, no passing out, but sometimes, it is for longer. my friend who i spoke about earlier is on holiday, and i cannot talk to anyone about it, if there even is anything to worry about. but it is getting slightly worse, the faintings are coming back, and the food is fading, and i am starting to throw up again. i havnt had anything like this for the past 3 months. i thought it had gone. and i'm scared, do i need help? and please excuse my awful spelling. i would really appreciate a reply (: [3 xxxxxx
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