Hello, guest
Name: Mel87
[ Original Post ]
I have a four 1/2 year old son. He is an only child and his father and I are split up and have been for about 3 years. I am remarried and my husband and I have been together for about 2 1/2 years or so.

My son's father and I have joint custody. One week on/ One week off. His father lives with his mother and does not have a job so my son is pretty much taken care of by his grandmother when he is over there.

(Just thought that little bit of background may be helpful.)

Anyway, I've always noticed something different about my son. He is very smart. He can count to about 20. He can write his name, read some sight words, add small numbers together, knows all shapes and colors and letter sounds, etc. He is pretty much academically on track.

However, socially he is a little different. He started out VERY shy before he turned 2. He would get real nervous if he was around strangers and in a crowd he would just act compulsively and strangely because he was so nervous.

Now, he is not shy at all, although he does still get nervous around a lot of people and acts without thinking. (Nothing to harm anyone, just stuff that isn't socially normal. ) And it isn't constant just something that he does every once in a while. He may shake his head "no" when someone asks him a question like "What is your name?" he may put his hands over his ears when someone is speaking to him. He might make up funny words when in conversation making it really difficult for people to speak to him.

In school, he does his schoolwork fine. But since day 1 has had trouble with listening. He does not cooperate with group songs and games. He wanders off when he is supposed to be in line. He wont sit like he is supposed to on the floor. I've noticed when I've gone into the room that some of the children have actually made it a habit to grab his hand or to tell him what he is supposed to be doing because he wasn't listening.

The school is a little concerned. We have already started checklists for ADD. The autism team is supposed to be coming to look at him. I just don't think this is the problem. I just don't feel like it is an internal problem. Meaning, I feel like something in his environment can be fixed to help him. The custody issue wont change. one week on/one week off is all that we could agree to. (Because of the selfish grandmother)

He is an only child and had never attended daycare before he went to school. I know that plays a huge part. Both his father and I are pretty quiet people. I've been trying to get him out a little more but before he just didn't get out much other then to go to the store, park or family members house. So that may have something to do with it.

If anyone has experienced anything like this please let me know! I am concerned about my sons social development. And I do not want him to be nervous around people. He is always saying he is scared to go to school. His teacher is very nice and I have been to the classroom and looked in the door without her knowing many many many times. She is awesome to the children. The kids all love my son and treat him good. There is no reason for him to be afraid. It's like it is social anxiety causing him to go into his own little world and not listen. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.
Your Name


Your Reply here

Name: Mel87 | Date: Dec 6th, 2010 6:54 AM
Just wanted to add that when he watches movies, plays games, or has to solve basic life puzzles he does great. BUT when people are speaking around him, discussing something that is about to happen, he does not understand what is going on. He feels lost, and confused.

For instance, if the teacher is speaking to the whole class about going to watch a play in the gym and they need to line up, he gets confused. He starts wandering what is about to happen, what is he supposed to be doing? when in line to go to the gym, he wanders off. This part I don't quite understand yet. Maybe he is trying to get the teacher to stop him and give him a better explanation of what is about to go on, or maybe he is just NOT wanting to go because he doesn't know what will come of it. He becomes stubborn. (Not rude or mean) He just acts as if he doesn't hear the teacher and might even sit on the floor and will not move until someone takes him by the hand.

When I drop him off, whoever is on drop off duty has to hold his hand and walk him in, he wont go in by himself because he still does not know how to get to his classroom. The other kids in his class go without a problem. 

Name: mel87 | Date: Dec 6th, 2010 7:13 AM
I also wanted to add that he has some tics. They aren't too bad. It is very hard to notice them unless you are around him a lot. He tilts his head to the side every once in a while and makes a face that is kind of like a smile showing his teeth and spaces out for a second or two. He has a lot of signs of aspergers but I believe it to be a small case of aspergers if he does have it. His father does have some issue with socializing. I'm going to get him evaluated but wanted some advice first. I don't want the doctors to take lead of something before I even have a good understanding of what is going on and actually try to help him before we slap him with a misdiagnosis. 

Copyright 2024© babycrowd.com. All rights reserved.
Contact Us | About Us | Browse Journals | Forums | Advertise With Us