Hello, guest
Name: sara
[ Original Post ]
im trying to do the best i can for my sweet little girl but i constantly doubt myself and cant shake this overwhelming sense of guilt that im not doing enough for her and im not doing it right. i dont have any friends in the same situation as me and i feel very isolated by this as no one can fully understand how different life is like with a child. i rarely socialise and find it difficult to integrate when i get the chance....anyone out there like me?
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Name: monnierja | Date: Oct 13th, 2007 4:20 AM
Hi there.... I'm 23 and having my boy at the end of January. I doubt myself now and I'm sure there will be things I doubt after I have him... I just want you to know that there ARE other people out there going through what you are. Have you thought about looking for mom and baby exercise class? I've seen things for mom/baby yoga and dance classes... I really want to find one of those someday. And I was watching the Today show about single moms... they said it is very important to socialize and remain involved with the "outside" world.... As long as you're doing your best, no one is perfect. Keep your head up! Your daughter will one day know how amazing and strong her mother was to raise her by herself..she'll be proud to have you as her mom! 

Name: hollie | Date: Oct 14th, 2007 12:12 PM
hi sara, just read ur post and wanted 2 write 2 u, you are not on ur own! lol. i am ur age wiv a 19 month old son. everythink u said i can totally relate 2. im sure u are doin a great job of bringin up ur daughter. i do socialise alot i take him 2 lots of baby groups etc, but im the only one out of my friends that is a single parent and it is so lonely. how old is ur daughter? do u work? and just remember u are doin one of the hardest things in the world and ur doin it on ur own! b proud of urself x 

Name: madmummie | Date: Oct 16th, 2007 11:56 AM
i know how you feel I am a single mum to 3 children the best you can do for your daughter is be there for her 

Name: Nadiene07 | Date: Oct 17th, 2007 2:39 AM
I can def. understand that ..im 18 and going through a divorce. i was with the guy for 2 yrs and then it just ended ..we had been fighting for like 2 mths off and on but im so depressed and feel like a bad mom because i just cant get over him 

Name: laura | Date: Oct 28th, 2007 2:29 PM
im laura im 21 and was with my partner for 7 yrs up untill recently.we have a one year old boy cameron,me and my partner have recently split as im pregnant again.he claims he's not ready for another baby but where does that leave me and my son .he said if i ever need anything he'l be there but its not the same.im currently staying at my parents while trying to sort out with the council 2 get my own house..my parents are worried they think i should have an abortion and so does my ex..but wheneva anyone brings up that subject i just feel sick 2 my stomach,i had an abortion when i was 17 and with the same person if they had any idea what it did 2 me or what it was like they wudnt be asking it of me...so im keeping my baby but the doubts are still there ,is having this other baby fair on my son i already hae .will i be able 2 support both of my babies finacially and emotinally.....its terrifying but theres only one way 2 find out i guess 

Name: laura | Date: Oct 28th, 2007 2:31 PM
no matter what happens between me and my partner 7 yrs 1gether is a long time i just cant turn over a new leaf and start again no matter what i will always love him.what is it they always say about 1st loves i cant remember but i might try and forget him but my heart wont let it never will 

Name: JustmeandtheKid26 | Date: Oct 29th, 2007 7:01 PM
My child isn't here as of yet; but the father no longer speak (at least this is how it is now). I am terribly afraid already, so I do have an idea of how you are feeling. What I advise all people in pain to do is to turn to God. I don't socialize very much anymore either. I am always at home. I feel depressed most of the time and the family around me isn't any help. I understand, even if just a little. I know you don't know me, but as a single parent-to-be, and someone going through her pregnancy alone, you can talk to me. Please pray to God and ask Him to help you raise your baby the correct way. So she'll know she is loved unconditionally and nothing is her fault. Why are you afaid to socialize? 

Name: Gemma | Date: Oct 30th, 2007 11:51 AM
oh my god i know exactly what you mean as im in the exact same situation. i have a little girl and am also 22 and feel that im not enough for my little girl as i cant give her a proper family. 

Name: tinkerbell | Date: Oct 30th, 2007 12:55 PM
hi im in the exact same situation as u im 22 with a little boy and i always feel im not doing enough 4 him and because i have to work 4days a week i put him in daycare i feel like im a bad person i always dobt myself and often feel guiltey but i love my child and woodnt have it any other way i dont no why we feel guily we're the 1s who are there for them every day and always will be like urself i dont go out with my friends very often and as much as they try to understand how im feeling sometimes i know deep down that they will never truly no unless they go through the same experience if u ever need to talk im here jus give me a shout ;o) 

Name: hollyjade | Date: Nov 3rd, 2007 11:27 PM
i know how you feel although im not a single mother i have a beautiful babay girl and on my second even though im with there father i dont feel alone i have no friends either really...and being a parent there really is no right way do your best that all you can do !! 

Name: hartc2747 | Date: Dec 24th, 2007 12:31 AM
heh, it's okay. i'm in the same situation. I have a 5 year old son, a 2 year old son and a 6 month old daughter. decided to be a single mother about a year and a half ago. it's hard and i doubt myself all the time. i feel like i'm not a good mom at times because i cant always be there w/ all the kids at the same time and spend equal time w/ them. there are times that i just get so overwhelmed and break and i just sit there and cry and pray to god that it will get better and that my life will get easier. 

Name: yes baby | Date: Dec 24th, 2007 10:52 AM
i'm here for you contact me at [email protected] 

Name: Kayla | Date: Apr 7th, 2008 12:04 AM
Yah i had my first child at 17 and just gave birth to my second almost a month ago..i'm now 20 and my kids have the same father and all but he is not currently around and well i feel its my fault and i think my kids are gonna blame me one day when they get older and realize their dad isn't around because of me ya know..i feel like everything i did after he left me was wrong and now i get that all ur child needs is love ya and diapers but love and it sounds like ur giving her alot of that..but i am the same all my friends just kinda dropped when i got pregnant with my son at 17 and thenafter he was born really didn't have too much time for making new friends so i got a job and my sons father found me convinced me to move to florida with him and well i was and still am madly in love with him so i did and got pregnant with my second who is such a beautiful little girl and somedays itsjust way too hard and i wanna give up or even just take a day off ya know but i love my kids so much i don't wanna leaave them either not even for a minute..kinda afraid to go back to work once my leave is up...anyways u sound like a great mom ..good luck 

Name: giosmama26 | Date: Apr 8th, 2008 1:45 AM
hey im a 22 year old single mom 

Name: Shelle | Date: Apr 19th, 2008 6:59 AM
Sara I am 24, single with 2 children I have no close family or friends who are in my situation everyday I get up I make the decision that I'm going to get through the day. I find making myself exercise boosts me up... 

Name: Shelle | Date: Apr 19th, 2008 7:05 AM
24year old single mum of a 5year old and 3year old, if anyone wants to chat you can reach me on [email protected] 

Name: youngzhang1982 | Date: Aug 27th, 2008 1:15 AM
thanks for the message, i think you catch my attention is not just by your looking, i prefer the women has her natural beauty in their heart. i am an adult and i do not believe in true love, but i trust life-long marriage. so my wish is my future wife is never married before, if they have children, that is fine, we can raise them up together with my own children. oh, my hobby is walking, reading and enjoy the good food. actually, my plan is after my marriage, i will give my wife 50% my salary, if we have children. i will give her another 10%, i need keep 40% my salary is enough, maybe 20% to support my mum and dad later, i think i just belong to the middle class, one house and one boat, two or three car, own my own land and some restaurant business, i want to open my own sushi bar later in San Francisco area. anyway, life is short, i will try my best, work hard and glory the God, help more people. i think i believe in god since i am a postgraduate student in england nottingham, i need do two part time restaurant job to survive, pay my rent and pay my tuition fee, life goes the hardest way, every night when i finish my night shift job, i pass by one 700 years old church, jesus picture is just there on the window, i pray him to give me some peace in my heart, Jesus is always ready to listen and he is a great father. i think i will follow his rule whole my life, i never married and so far i have no children, but i do not want divorce, i can sign contract with my lawyer, if i divorce due to my family affair, i am willing to pay 80% my salary to my children as penalty fee, i believe i am the only few can do this in Seattle area, haha.....nice talk to you, if you want to meet, i think i have time next week, by the way, if you really want to go step further on our future relationship, i think i do not need bother to date other women, i believe i am a honest man and i am a good family man too.
best regards
ps: my resume
4748 19th AVE seattle, WA 98105, Tel: 206-816-5015 Email: [email protected] / Gender: Male
Ph.D in University of Washington, focus on organisation design and financial management. (January 2006- present)
Master degree in research (Mphil) in manufacturing engineering, manufacturing organization research group, Loughborough University, Leicestershire, England, UK. (Sep 2003- Dec 2005)
Dissertation topic: Building a boundaryless leagile manufacturing organization through HITOP method. Advisor: Professor Neil Burns (editor of IJPR) ( Email: [email protected] )
Master degree in Science (Msc) in Electrical engineering, University of Nottingham, Nottinghamshire, England, UK (Sep 2002-Sep 2003) Thesis topic: Extra high voltage (EHV) power transmission control in China three Gorges project using Newton Raphson method and Mathlab computer iteration method. Advisor: Dr Dave.Thomas (Email:[email protected] )
Bsc in Mechanical Engineering, Dalian University of Technology, Dalian city, China (Sep 1990-July 1994) Thesis topic: Testing a new diamond cutting tool material performance in Japanese Sanyo Company through comparing with other traditional cutting tools. Advisor: Dr Hong Tao Zhang. (Head of cutting tools research group)
Academic Research: I: I worked as a research Assistant at Wichita state university on the subject of Industry engineering. The main focus of the research is on lean and green manufacturing system design for Boeing Company in Wichita, Kansas. Since Boeing Company set the goal to be "100% lean and green company" in 2011, I as a researcher focused on waste management and energy conservation in order to achieve the goal. After years of experiment on a small motor workshop provided by private companies, we have achieved to reduce the waste and contamination by 35 percents. The quality of the motor increased by 25 percents by detail cleaning and better combustion technology.II: When I was completing my master in electrical engineering at University of Nottingham, I worked at fire-power station in England Nottingham city. I worked on power transfer through super-computer. The use of C++ and Java was needed and the station was responsible for providing power for more than three million people in the surrounding cities called East-Middle land area including Birmingham city, Nottingham city and south Manchester city.
Working experience:
1: Electrical engineer: Seattle Trident seafood company, help solving the seafood manufacturing line mechanical and electrical problem.01/2008-Present.
2: Manufacturing supervisor: Japan Mabuchi motor company in Hong Kong china, in charge of one plastic injection molding workshop following ISO 9002/ 14001 standard. (Sep 1994-Nov 2001) This company has worldwide reputation on mini DC motor products and its customers include Sony, Toshiba, Sanyo, Sharp and HP, Ford companies, through Japanese Just-in-time management, my workshop quality has been improved from 67 percent to 95 percent, on October 1999, my workshop quality reaches to 100 percent , because of this distinguish quality improvement, I won Tokyo silver medal for Quality improvement.Language: Fluent in English and Chinese. A little bit Japanese and Spanish and France language.
you can find my photo at www.hi5.com, user name is [email protected], password is 12345. thanks 

Name: helen | Date: Sep 22nd, 2008 11:09 PM
yes!!!!!!!! there are people out there like you......... take me for example i'm 23yrs and i'm 28weeks pregnant with my first cild, my child father left me to return to his ex girlfriend who doesn't care that i'm pregnant.

i dont work anywhere my mother is dead, my dad disowned me years ago after stating he regreted having me and my half brother doesn't really help me.

so i do not have any means of an income
many days i sit at home wondering where will i money or clothes to take care of my baby.
child maintaines? that is enough babies need love and when i think about my social life it seem everyone just want to get laid but at the end of the day i'm really looking for some who could bring joy and comfort into my life asa well as happinessand be a good role model to my baby, so sweety you are not alone out there. there are worse of than u propably me to but u got to trust God for all.

and i do believe my life stinks worse than yours. 

Name: prerna | Date: Nov 22nd, 2010 1:00 PM
yes i can understand you Sara. I am just 22, unwed mother. I have a baby boy, 2.5months old.....nobody in my family knows about it. Its a sin in India to be an unwed mother. I had a beautiful life waiting ahead which I myself made after working hard. But pregnancy test that day changed it all. And I am here now, too fatigued even to think of next moment. I would love if you interact with me. And I would request other mothers to join this discussion. 

Name: primm | Date: Nov 24th, 2010 2:40 AM
call me if u would like help in chat im 28 and i have 4 kids i was 16 when had my first.. plse contact me if need anything or someone there in ur position

[email protected] 

Name: Jenlucy | Date: Jan 26th, 2011 12:12 AM
I am 22 and I know how you feel. I always doubt myself because I always have harsh judgments of people around me who tell me I was too young to have a baby, let alone being a single mother. I lost all my friends and I dont know any moms my age. It's really hard. During the day my daughter keeps me occupied, but being alone the rest of the time is challenging. I learned that there are many single moms in their 20's...but no resources for us. It's always for teen moms or moms in their 30's or older. Just try to reach out and keep teaching out...thats the only way to get by. 

Name: stephmlesh | Date: Jan 27th, 2011 2:30 AM
I completely understand what you are going through. I am 20 years old have a beautiful 4 and a half month old daughter. Everyone seems to look at me weird because i am kinda young. But i love my daughter and i don't regret it at all. But to make things worse my husband is being brought up on child abuse charges and is currently out of the house at least for the next 4 months. I had to quit my job because he watched her at night time when i was a work but he is no longer in the house. So i am currently looking for a job. 

Name: Chtouki | Date: May 7th, 2011 8:06 PM
Hello world im new here
can i make new friends please 

Name: Chtouki | Date: May 19th, 2011 9:28 PM
Hello All
Can We Be Friends Please 

Name: Amy | Date: Jul 3rd, 2011 3:38 PM
I feel exactly the same way..life is hard enough let alone being a young single parent..if u have fb add me
.amy catherine b 

Name: Jasmine | Date: Jul 6th, 2011 11:17 AM
I'm recently seperated with a 2 year old (also 22) and finding it hard as he!!. I miss my ex so much but we fought way too much. I have no friends in the area as I moved to the country to be with him 3 years ago. All my friends are in the city or have moved farther away. I tend to feel like I'm not a good mom, I know I could do more, but right now, I feel so down. All I think about is my ex and everything around me remindes me of him. It's not easy. 

Name: Thomas | Date: Jul 7th, 2011 5:49 PM
I do 

Name: anna plummer | Date: Jul 11th, 2011 12:46 AM
hi there. i am 20. and i already have 2 kids. i've been working online thru Alma & Co. as a fashion consultant. I know it might be hard for us but we have no choice but to deal with it. Afterall, they will all just grow up and the ones that will be helping us in the future too. 

Name: jem | Date: Jul 22nd, 2011 10:25 AM
im 22 and pregnant & the father doesn't want to be involved at all. I am constantly stressing about how I'm going to cope & about how I'm going to pay for everything etc. Every weekend is boring for me & I don't know what to do about that, when everyone else seems to have a boyfriend or be out drinking with friends... 

Name: Courtney | Date: Jul 26th, 2011 6:50 PM
Hi Sara,

I just had a baby girl in February when I was 19 years old. I am now 20 and am facing exactly the same things you are facing. I feel like I am not doing enough or being a good mom to my baby girl. I definately know how you feel. It is definately hard. I am engaged to a great guy who is not the father of my daughter but he took over as her father and I am still feeling the same way as you. I would love to talk to you more and I am just really looking for other single moms who are in the same situations as me.


Name: Tiffany | Date: Jul 30th, 2011 9:13 PM
Hi there, I get what you mean. I'm 21 and i have 3 kids. I love them more than anything and I feel bad that i cant get them everything they want and sometimes i have to barrow money to get simple things like wipes or diapers. My friends don't hang out with me much cause of my kids. they just don't understand. I'm usually quite strong and i don't let things get me down but these sort of things take a major toll on me. 

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