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Name: jennifer
[ Original Post ]
My fiance broke up with me 2 mths ago and moved out from our house we had with our 3 yr old daughter. I am so devastated and lonely i miss and love him so much. He doesnt want anything to do with me and he still sees his daughter but doesnt spend that time she needs. She has started acting out in preschool and is always hitting and biting and just being mean. I feel like giving up I am hurting so bad and so is she and i dont know what to do
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Name: naomi | Date: Jul 27th, 2006 1:15 AM
jennifer this is the hardest thing to go through, believe me i know my partner of 6yrs broke up with me over the phone while i was visiting my folks our daughter is 2yrs old he hasnt seenn his girlnow for 5 months! i know it feels hopeless right now but you really need to try for your beautiful little girl, its hard to give them your everything when you are hurting so bad but to see them smile makes it a bit easier, it does get easier( believe it or not) everyday, the only advice i can give you jennifer is to surround yourself with family and friends or people that love you its hard now to want to be with people, but it is good to now that there are people out there who do love you and care for you , do little things for yourself , take a hot bath when yuor daughter goes to sleep, read gossip mags and escape a little, these are just a few things that helped me and then as time goes by take your girl for a walk to the park, youd be suprised its so simple but every little bit helps. for now thogh grieve when you need to and keep talking to people or read some books on seperation there is sometimes good advice in them , if you are really not coping well at all go see a counseller to talk you through things and they may be able to give you some help with your daughters behaviour. Please dont give up your little girl needs you and loves you and one day you will be able to make sense out of all this and then you will be able to help her through this also. Take care of yourslf jennifer, please dont hesitate to write again if you want to talk to someone 

Name: Lizzi | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 1:01 AM
She could be rebelling because her dad is suddenly gone,(my son did that at age 2 when me and his dad separated). Fortunately we reconciled though and things improved. Talk to your ex and see if there's any way possible the two of you can reunite. If he says no then it will just take time for both you and your little one to heal.Is there an uncle who could spend time with her? Maybe the male figure would help calm her,it's worth a try. 

Name: Christy | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 1:48 AM
I know that this doesn't help when you're going through something tough, but time does heal. Focus on the good things in your life, like your daughter. You must be a role model for her and try to get past this at least on the outside so that she doesn't internalize your pain as well as her own. I wouldn't make that big of a deal about her behavior. When adults are hurt, they act out too. When she's had time to heal and accept the new situation, her behavior will improve. Time is all it takes. Hang in there and stay strong! 

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