Hello, guest
Name: cakeyum
[ Original Post ]
Hello, I am a single father who was legally granted Physical Placement of my 5 year old daughter. Her mother and I have joint custody, however, our daughter lives with me and "visits" her mother 3 nights a week. In our legal agreement the judge ordered my ex to pay child support to me, however, we made a verbal agreement in court together that I would not accept her child support nor would I go after her for it. This was a compromise I was willing to make to end our emotional custody battle once and for all, since it was really a difficult situation to be in for me. Also, I don't care about taking my ex's money. I do okay on my own, however, I barely have a dime to my name by the end of the month with all the bills I am responsible for on my own. You may be wondering why I received Physical Placement instead of the mother, which is rare. Her mother was partying a lot, and basically decided over time she didn't feel like being a mother. Okay, fine, we all have our wants and needs. She eventually moved out of our home without any plans on how she would get to spend time with her own daughter. At the time it didn't appear to be much of a concern for her, but when her parents found out it was a different story, and that is when Family Court came into play. I was happy with the outcome, although my lawyer informed me that if we wanted to take it further the judge would have given me full custody based on the situation with her mother. My big ethical debate at the moment is in regards to my tax return. Since I am the Physical custodian of our child, Head of Household, and all of that stuff, I am entitled to the Earned Income Tax Credit on my income taxes. In the past I had shared this money with my ex, but that was when we were a couple, living together. We did not live together at all last year. In fact, our daughter didn't visit her mother, or live with her mother at all for the first three months of last year. Her mother also had two roommates for most of last year helping her pay the bills, one being the boyfriend I believe she had been cheating on me with. She is also dependent on her parents for money, as an adult. They continue to pay her phone bill, have recently purchased a vehicle for her, etc. My argument is that I pay ALL of my bills, rent, utilities, food, shelter, heat for my daughter, far more than she does for her. This tax refund is meant to go toward the child, however, my ex claims she needs it to pay the IRS her back taxes! Also, I have Lola for half of one of her visitation days every week, which is every Sunday. Plus there were many many Tuesdays this past year where I took our daughter an extra day in which my mother watched her for free in the evenings while I worked. My mother normally watches our daughter Wednesday and Thursday evenings when I am working and doesn't ask for any compensation, so that alone has saved my ex and I thousands of dollars on child care. I am also in a position, unfortunately, where I am laid off for 2 months of the year. The Tax Credit Refund I have received will be going toward housing, feeding, clothing, etc, our daughter for those two months. I know that my ex will most likely be spending it frivolously if I were to give her half, which she feels she is entitled to. SO...the question is, IS she entitled to this money, and if so, based on the facts I laid out, how much is she to be entitled to?

I would truly appreciate any help or advice.

Thank you!
Your Name


Your Reply here

Name: amy | Date: Mar 9th, 2011 1:37 AM
i wouldnt give her any of it. I have all y kids living with me and joint custody. their dad gets to claim them as dependants per divorce...my own stupid mistake...and he is still on mortgage..long story...he gets to claim 3 kids and mortgage interest i pay on MY house and doesnt give me half the tax refund he agreed to give me. He is 2 years behind on child support payments . he claims head of household when none of our kids live with him. he does spend time with the kids and thats most important to me, but i am in a financial bind and problems with irs . but hey, as long as he spends time with the kids, right? 

Copyright 2024© babycrowd.com. All rights reserved.
Contact Us | About Us | Browse Journals | Forums | Advertise With Us