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Name: motherdearest
[ Original Post ]
I'm having a child from a man who already has a family. he says he'll support me (money wise) but can't be a father. I understand and was okay with it but now i'm not sure if he will be there (money wise). That's not all before i got pregnant i felt in my heart that he was also sleeping with my sister which they both said i was crazy (of course) I found out i was pregnant when i was three months, i knew that if i was pregnant i wasn't going to abort and finding out at three months made it easier to tell him NO. Sometimes i think that subconsciously i made it happen (the pregnancy). Him haveing a family i can deal with but him sleeping with my sis i can't. I no longer have a relationship with her (sis) and try to have one with him for the baby's sake but whenever he doesn't answer the phone or doesn't come by when he say's he is or sends me messages late at night that's his going home i can't help but to wonder if he is with her. I have been dealing with these feeling since Nov 2005 my baby is due in Nov 2006. The stress that these feeling put on me maybe the reason why i couldn't tell that i was pregnant. I thought it was the stress of what i was going throught and at times well most of the time the feelings slap me in the face and i can't help but cry and wonder why, (how could she hurt me so) i know he's to blame also but he's not the one i see in family pictures. A father can be replaced a sister can't . I don't know how to deal with this anymore.
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Name: motherdearest | Date: Sep 19th, 2006 12:24 AM
I guess you girls rather not say anything about this situation and i don't blame you's because its a tight spot. What can i do but try to get strong and move on right 

Name: molly-may | Date: Sep 21st, 2006 2:46 PM
First of all, you better go to the courts and make sure he is going to give you money. I think your best bet would be to granish his wages so you know your child will be provided for. Secondly, why do you think that he is sleeping with your sister. Have you had any clues as to him seeing her? Your sister is your blood, which should be put before any man you will ever have in your life. She is your sister, and I am sure even if she is sleeping with him, then it was probably a mistake on her part, as it was a mistake on yours. Please tell me why you were sleeping with a man who already has a family, I am sure he doesn't care about you as much as you thought, if he did then I am sure he would be with you. You shouldn't "deal with" the fact that he has a family, you sound better than that. What kind of a father is he going to be to your child, he is probably never going to tell anyone the child is his. I think you need to get child support under way....ditch the man, I mean forget about him, then go and talk to your sister. You are a better person than that, to let a man walk all over you. Now that you are pregnant you need to take charge of this situation and stop letting this man walk all over you. Good Luck! 

Name: motherdearest | Date: Sep 22nd, 2006 2:20 AM
Thanks molly-may your words mean alot, and yes have cut all contact with him as for my sis while like they say a females' intuition is usually right. There were things that she didn't explain and if she tried they didn't make sense. The words we exchanged were hurtful and bottom line she didn't nothing o prove me wrong. I as anyother sis would have done anything to prove that nothing happened or was happening. I made a big deal about how i would do everything on my own and therefore won't do the child-support after all i knew what i was getting myself into right. I'm usually smart about things like this what can I do I fell for an ASSHOLE. It happen's to the best of us right. I just could n't do the abortion thing at 3 months. I just have to take it for what it is and move on. Like they say what don't break you makes you stronger well whole situation really did break me so now I just have to get stronger if not for me for my baby. THANKS AGAIN. 

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