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Name: nora
[ Original Post ]
hey everyone.. im a now single mother to a beautiful 10 wk old daughter, but i have a problem with her father.. and im talkin major problem, and i need serious opnions...

ever since the day i brought victoria home from the hospital my now ex has not contacted me what so ever to see how his little girl is doing.. he knows how to contact me.. hell we're even members of the same forum that i frequent.. (and he's a forum administrator) He just doesnt seem to care about his daughter, yet he calls himself a "proud parent" on myspace... we've had a rocky relationship since day one... and though out my pregnancy he would threaten to take victoria away from me when ever we had a blow up.. the last time happening the day we brought miss tori home from the hospital.. since then i havent heard from him.. i dont even know where he lives now, and im having a hard time taking care of my daughter. (im 28 yrs old btw)

Now im sure someone here has gone thru the custody proceedures, so what are the chances that the courts will grant me sole legal custody of my daughter since she has been in my care for the entire 10 weeks of her life? I live with my brother and split rent and bills with him, i hold a part-time job, i am getting WIC for the baby and she's got medicaid as well.. so she is very well taken care of, and if i need something i got 2 awesome parents and 3 wonderful siblings that will help me....... as far as victoria's father, he's been known to move from place to place.. only living with friends, he's a habitual liar, cant organize his finances (in which he blames me for) and the kicker.. he has a 19 year old son which he technically abandoned when he was 14 and hasnt talked to him since...(the reason why my ex doesnt talk to his oldest son anymore is just a joke. but thats a story for another time)

i just need some info or advice... im already gonna go after my ex for child support, but i want legal custody of my daughter too.. i dont want him to end up doing the same thing to my daughter as he did to his boy....
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Name: jamcarant | Date: Oct 22nd, 2006 4:22 AM
What state are you in? I don't know how it is where you are, but where I am, the mother has full custody when the parents aren't married unless she is proven an unfit mother. He sounds kind of like my ex (my 3 and 4 yr olds' father). He's a lier, can't keep a job (partly because he keeps getting put in jail for past child support), and goes back and forth between his mom's house and friends' houses. He has 4 kids total (2 are mine and 1 each with 2 other girls). We get along (kind of) but he has threatened to take me to court for custody. He changed his mind because he doesn't really have anything to offer.

So basically what I'm saying is that you probably already have full custody. You might want to check it out with children's services or something, though, because I know the laws aren't the same everywhere. 

Name: lil_dancer77 | Date: Oct 26th, 2006 1:29 AM
I dunno where abouts in the world you are, but if you are in Australia the new family laws state that its really got nothing to do with the parents liking each other or seeing each other or how much attention he has paid to you and your daughter now or in the future. It is based on what is in the best interest of your child, therefore if seeing her mum and dad and her grandparents and aunties and uncles on both sides is best for her based on meditation etc...then thats how it will work. Its really unfair i know. Im going through a similar situation at the moment except im only 12 weeks along. Some guys like the power trip and they do all they can to make sure that they have all control of the situation, don't let him, make sure you stand your ground if he tried to get in contact with you. Speak to a Lawyer is well thats your best shot to get the right advice. If you are in australia you can call legal aid there number is: 1300651188 I rang them a week ago and found tehm to be very very helpful. Best of luck to you and your beautiful little girl. Stay true to yourself and make sure you hold your head high.
Nikki 

Name: oniedabear | Date: Nov 1st, 2006 5:50 PM
Your story sounds similar to mine only he didn't want anything to do with me when I told him I was pregnant. I had great family support and would've been lost without it. I get no child support and have no contact with my sons father, but he is a healthy four year old and will be starting school next year. I'm glad he was out from the beginning because there's nothing worse than dealing with broken promises and trying to explain why daddy doesn't want to see him anymore. I'm sure there will be questions when he's a little older, but for now he has no worries for anything except what's for dinner.
you can email me at [email protected] 

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