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| Name: Sharla | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 5:37 AM |
| I just read what you wrote in the 'daddy too strict' topic, and I have to say, I understand where youre coming from and wasnt at all trying to cause an argument. I understand what youre saying but obviously never having been in the position I dont actually know what I personally would do, all I was saying is that Ive seen what its like to have an older mum (my friends mum) but hey, we are all different, not everyone is the same. What you wrote in brackets about (husband tragically dying) frelt like someone had stuck a fork in me. My boyfriend (the twins dad) passed away in a car crash when they were just 3 months old. I was on the path to recovery (I promised myself when I found out I was pregnant) and had a relapse after the accident. I honeslty wasnt trying to get at older mums, I was just putting my point of view accross just like everybody else. I wasnt in anyway offended by your post because you were diplomatic and not the least bit rude, something I hope was understood when you read my post. Unlike debbie_dettner who could only think of insults (like telling me Im ignorant and foolish and telling me to use a dictionary) you gave your opinion. and I cant get angry with that. Freedom of speech is something that no-one can take away from us, even though some politicians are trying (talk about Tony Blair and his political correctness crap)!!! I wish you and your children the very best. ↑ |
| Name: E | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 11:48 PM |
| Dear girl... So sorry to hear about your boyfriend. I can't even start to imagine what you've been through. How are you doing now, are you on your own, are your parents in the picture? Are your children well? ↑ |
| Name: maxieellis | Date: Jul 17th, 2006 12:15 AM |
| Hello Sharla....I have been away for a day and just have read some of your posts. Your amazing! Your point of view although it may differ form anothers is welcome here. It helps us all get a bigger picture of a situation or particular issue than we would otherwise have. I am also amazed at what you have been through. I am 45 now and gotta tell you that school of hard business....its a tough place to come from and manage your way through. I have been there too. Yup I'm one of the older moms....38 with my first and 40 with my second. But for me honey.....I thought I would never have children...not that I didnt want them...oh I did....but I began to think it was never going to happen. Then it did. It has been difficult...energy wise oh yes...but for me...I couldnt have been happier or more extatic...just for the fact I thought I may not be able to have them. I hope like E that all is going well these days for you and your children. Oh yeah....my spelling sucks I drop letters all the time! Although I use the dictionary (but only when I have to)....I have no time for in here in the forum...kids ya know?! Gotta take the moment when you get it and keep moving LOL! Again welcome.. Maxie ↑ |
| Name: Sharla | Date: Jul 20th, 2006 5:15 AM |
| E, yes I am on my own. I live with the kids and havnt been with anyone since I lost Jake (the kids dad). Im not ready yet, he was my boyfriend, my soulmate, my best friend. Also I dont want to confuse the kids by having different men in and out of their lives. Its not about me any more, my priority are the twins and I dont want to screw thm up in any way. Being a teenage mother Ive been told screws them up anyway! I love them so much, they are my little angels, I wouldnt change anything and am happy I fell pregnant when I did. The doctors told me that getting pregnant saved my life because I started eating again for them, it was the least I could do, so I'll never regret it. I know that being a teenage mum is hard work and it annoys me when people tell me I'll never be able to accomplish anything because I had them so young. Its not impossible to accomplish things with children, it just creates a few obstacles, ya know? Ive just finished high school and got the highest grades in my year and am going to university in september and cant wait. Theyre fine, happy and loving, even though we are going through the terriblw twos, lol, its not easy, especially with 2 of them, lol. My parents help me out financially but thats it. They kicked me out when I got pregnant, said things I cant forgive and still are embarrassed about me and the twins. Jakes parents are the best though, they treat me like a daughter and I couldnt be more grateful. If I ever had a problem, I know I could count on them and Jakes brother Danny. Danny is like a dad to them, he is the main male role model and he loves them to bits. Obviously Jakes dad is there as well but Danny is more of a father figure and they love him so much. They are more than I could have ever imagined. Beween them and Jake I finally found people that liked me and loved me for me, to me they are my parents and my family. Jakes mum is great, she is always there for me and always has been. Granted they were a bit disappointed when they found out I was pregnant, but soon got over it because they knew that you cant go back in time and change things. Im lucky in many ways, there are people who have been through a lot more than me and who have suffered a lot more than me. Sometimes I tend t wallow in self-pity which I know is very pathetic and I get so annoyed at myself because of it. I have beautiful and happy children and finally a family who loves me and especially the twins. Even though money is a struggle we manage to scrape by, we have a roof over our heads and food on the table. What more could a person want? How are you and your children? How many do you have? How old are they? Olivia and Leo are 2 now, boy does time fly! Maxieellis, thank you for your nice post. I know that in somethings my opinion is different to others, but I can honestly say, I was trying to get on anyone or offend them. Congratulations on having your children, as long as you are happy and so are the kids thats the most important thing. How are you? and your children? How old are they? Take care and look after yourselves. ↑ |
| Name: maxieellis | Date: Jul 20th, 2006 6:04 AM |
| Hi honey...Its so late but i just stoped in...my kids are girl almost seven and boy 4.5 . They are doing just great. This summer they are taking swimming lessons...well more swimming lessons so, so far its keeping us all busy. And we are doing crafts and rock painting...little projects like that...goodness...gotta keep them going ya know. Better for old mum I gotta tell ya lol! As for me dear...well I am alot better these days. I was not to happy about a week ago....just feeling blue..actually likely feeling sorry for myself...just having a moment. Ya know when the kids and everything is enough to make you tear your hair out. One of those days. But the ladies in here let me have that moment....I dont really do that here...just try and have fun....and I tell you....the commets and suggestions...they really did help. Infact some of them I have put into practice and I see a glimmer of it paying off already. Anyway hon...gotta get to bed. Its been a long day. But thank you so much for asking. Take care Sharla and by the way. You are really an amazing young lady. Maxie ↑ |
| Name: E | Date: Jul 21st, 2006 2:05 AM |
| It's true that when one door closes, the other opens. Your new family will help you with getting a degree, how wonderful is that. Yes, people have pre-conceptions about teenage moms, but one shouldn't generalize, for any age group. There are smart and goal-oriented teenagers, as there are anchorless 40-year olds. I can relate to poor relationship with a family, though I'm 42 I'm almost estranged with my own mother, due to lack of understanding that started in teenage years and lasted well into now. It's possible to build a good life despite your relationship with your own family. It's best to stay away from people who suck your energy and hopes and life. And the money - they will always be short, no matter whether you are a doctor or a shelf stocker. That's not the main thing. My kids are 18 mo and 3 years old, a boy and a girl, too. They are so close in age, they are like twins - both toddlers now. There are pictures of them on this forum's picture page www. wambackauto.com/babycrowd/index.html You can send me pictures of your kids, too, and I'll post them. [email protected] Take care. ↑ |
