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Name: Irene
[ Original Post ]
Hi guys, Im expecting my 4th in september 16, & im feeling reaaly anxious, nervous& to make matters worse all day nausea, which i never had in other pregnacys, am i selfish for wanting a little girl this time round, i have 3 very beautiful sons, but my life would be so complete if God blessed us with a little girl, family are so different towards me & hubby cause we went ahead & got pregnate for the 4th time, they think were nuts, because we are struggling with home loan etc & rather than getting pregante i should of been working fulltime, but day care alone is $55 day& because my husband earns over $32,000 i dont get rebate, so id be working for peanuts, this is making me even more depressed, be honest girls, am i crazy for allowing to fall pregnate at time like this!
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Name: Angela G | Date: Jan 26th, 2006 5:55 PM
I have 5 kids and everytime we got prego EVERYONE put us down even though we have always taken care of our own. I'm 28 and my honey is 29, if you all think it will be ok and take care of your own, then NO ONE has any business butting in.
Good Luck sweetie and congrats. 

Name: angela | Date: Jan 26th, 2006 6:03 PM
just be happy about bringing another life into this world. We are having the same problems. I am 32 weeks and we cant pay all of our bills cause I had to resign from my job because my baby doc thought I had a heart problem. Now I have no heart problem and no job. And no one want to hire me cause I am so pregnant. But everything works its self out, It is just a stuggle trying to get throughit all. Not to mention being pregnant with the hormones in tacked. I feel like a crazy lady!! LOL !! I am going to try and do daycare. But it not them I will have to try to find a night job and work when my husband is home so we dont have to pay for daycare!! How old are ur other kids? 

Name: Maxie | Date: Jan 26th, 2006 6:29 PM
Dont worry about other people even if its family Irene. Being pregnant and sick all day every day can make anyone slightly nuts.

Its not selfish to want a girl. Its natural. We all love our boys very much...but usually not always most woman would like to have a girl. What ever God sends will be perfect.

Even with two kids we struggle. If you have kids and an average income...you stuggle. Though until college and weddings I dont really think it makes much diffrence. Oh the grocery bill is higher but if it wasnt that it would be something else. Most kids wear handmedowns. Big whoop. Most of us did too. We all survived.

Just a guess, but some of the people in your life sound like they have grown children. They forget. And who would advicate you leaving your children with someone else. With three children and a forth on the way unless your a doctor or lawyer or something with a top salery...it doesnt pay. And then there is the worry.

Dont let anyone tell you how you could better run your life, your children and you home and money issues. Its your life and you will be just fine. Everything has a way of working out when good is at the forefront.

Take care. 

Name: Irene :-) | Date: Jan 27th, 2006 12:39 PM
Hey Angela & Maxie, thanks heaps for that, its weird how i get so much more support from the two of you compared to our brothers sisters etc put together, Yes the people who are telling us off have got grown up kids, my kids are 7, 6 & 3yrs old, i do work from home doing ironing, i have a total of 4 regular customers, its not the most favourite job in the world, but hey it pays for our groceries each week& being able to pay for the groceries out of my ironing money makes me proud,Family still but in & say i should be working in an office etc, as in their eyes ironing is a disgusting job, blah blah blah, i really shouldnt care what they all say, worrying & stressing is only going to make this pregnacy even more displeasing on top of morning sickness, Weve decided to put our home up for Auction so we can get this stress off our chest, its for the best as Hubby lost his job :-( , we have fallen to far behind even if he did get a job tommorow, we are starting a new year, with a new baby, another reason why our families are disgusted is that from owning we will be renting, stiff Cheddar Lol, i wont let pride get in the way, this baby is a blessing From God& this little person growing inside me right now doesnt need this stress either,
so thank heaps to both of you, Congratulations to you also Angela, take care both of you, chat soon hopefully, God bless to you both, xx 

Name: stcaey | Date: Jan 27th, 2006 1:16 PM
what were you thinking ? getting pregnate after the struggles your going through, your family have got reasons to be pissed off with you, i think you are crazy! & yes you are selfish and greedy for wanting a girl...... 

Name: Maxie | Date: Jan 28th, 2006 1:18 AM
Come on Stacey...every life is diffrent. Irene is doing more than some would consider. How about asking if her family is helping in any way at all? Instead of harping at them.

We have only two children not one person will lend a hand in anything. We do everything ourselves and never have relied on outside help. Though, I can tell you if they need a truck or somewhere to dump their junk (we own an acerage) they are here...uninvited I might add, whenever the moment moves them. Frankly...we arnt interested in their help either. Just would be nice if the grandparents would stop and take the time to be with the grandchildren ONCE in a while. They are simply to selfish.

Too, some people just like larger families. When you are confronted with constant "downisam" it can make you rethink and question your own choices.

Anyone at any level can loose their jobs. The amount of children in the home wont elieviate the concerns either.

Wanting a girl to me is not selfish. Thats my opinion and like you intitled to it.

Say what you will Stacey wont bother me. Its the net. I can ignor anything I choose...just like you.

To Irene,

Your doing what you have to and I am sorry that you are loosing your home. Wish I had a Zillion bucks I would take care of it for you. Though you know well with God on your side you can never really loose anything.

Your husband WILL FIND a new job. You know that.

Lost a house. Gaining a tremendous new blessing. I believe you have already found the right answer. -Having your child-. 

Name: Irene | Date: Jan 28th, 2006 2:20 AM
Hi Maxie,
how are you? thank you so much for that, i cant type lol, my tears are getting in the way, youve made me really emotional, our families are like that also, my mother on the other hand does offer to help by baby sitting but sadly she lives too far and doesnt drive, but my inlaws live very close by and 11 yrs being in their family she has never offered to baby sit, weve needed her on urgent occasions and its a really big deal to take them, infact in 11yrs together shes probably watched them 10 times if im lucky, and then i have to drop them off there and pick them up late in cold weather, id rather she come here where kids are in their nice warm home and in bed by 8pm, but she wont do it under those conditions, its either her way or noway, so i rarely have the help, so therfeore no one has the right to tell us how many kids we should have or not have,
if i want to have 10 ill have 10 lol, we know our limits, if they all helped out while i selfeshsly went out and partied and had no resposibitys of being a mother for our kids, then they had a right to talk, but they dont, so inlaws should keep out of it, it wasnt only my choice with wanting this baby, it was my husbands aswell, so they cant just put the blame on me,

and anyway a child is a blessing from God, sad how they dont even reckonise that,

once again thanks alot Maxie, May God bless you & your family, take care and all the best,

Name: Maxie | Date: Jan 28th, 2006 3:06 AM

How am I doing? To make it short, you might read my post form yesterday and today under, I think it was..." Anything aside from crazy sex and nanny shmeg". It gets right to the point and saves us tons of time. And good for a giggle a the very least.

Completed now are the other tasks I had before me and supper eaten. Yet yes, noooo...the day is not done...will be soon though! Yee Haw!!! Just when you think you are going to loose it entirely you find that little bit of strength to carry on. You must...you are MOTHER! And we can.

I understand what you are going through regarding family. Sad they just dont get it huh? When my children are grow with families of their own if old mother is still here...they will not experience from their parents what we have been experiencing. Life is full of enough obsticals and troubles and nasty family they can do without. To be certain they wont get that from us. To me, after you have raised your family, to have grandbabies to enjoy in a very diffrent and special way you couldnt with your own...is the blessing within the blessing. It couldnt be a sweeter reward.

When you are selfcentred you miss out on so very much. Pay no mind difficult as it may be at times Irene and remember who you are, knowing its not you...its them. Their loss. And the blame is completely theirs.

Take care. Hope to hear from you soon regarding anything. Good, bad, happy or sad. No matter. I'll still be here cheering you, your husband and family on. 

Name: Irene | Date: Jan 28th, 2006 3:34 AM
Hey Maxie,

i havent read your nanny schmeg post but after this i will, i always need a good laugh!
we all do dont we,
so true with everything you say,
i have only one sister and two brothers, i wished that my sister thought the way you do :-(

are you in the US? im in Australia,
i also cant wait , well i can wait lol, to be a grandparent and be the best garandparent and mother inlaw for that matter to my son and daugter inlaws,
you nad i need to break that tradition that mother inlaws are horrible lol,
if ever u want to email me or im me , my addy is [email protected]
i feel we have heaps in common, hope you have a great day or night where ever you are, take care hun
God bless 

Name: kylie jorgensen | Date: Jan 30th, 2006 6:40 AM
i don;t think ur crazy you wanted another baby well then stuff all and enjoy ur pregnacy and no your not crazy wanting a girl i have 2 and they can be difficalt but after 3 boys it would be a nice chang 

Name: sheena | Date: Jan 30th, 2006 6:22 PM
hi irene! no way!!!!!!! there is only one person who can tell you if your ready for another and thats you. Dont let anyone get to you its your chioce and as for wanting a girl well its only natural!!! I am in the same situation as you money wise home loan credit cards etc....... but lets face it we all manage! i hope you get through the pregnancy ok and you get your wish at the end of the day your love for your baby will not differ for boy/girl!!!! all the best x x x x 

Name: Marie | Date: Jan 30th, 2006 9:17 PM
Don't worry about what everyone else thinks! Are they taking up the slack for you? If no...then they have no say so what so ever on your decisions.

No, you are not selfish for wanting a little girl this time. I have a boy (3 yo)and a girl (18 m) and I love my son to peices, but life is complete with them both! It's nice having a little twinkle toes running around in the midst of all of the boy choas.

I too have battles with the whole work/daycare thing and have chose to stay home. I am afraid of the guilt that I will feel for leaving them for my own good. My husbands makes enough for us but, is my sanity worth the price of letting them be brought up by strangers. Right now, I say no....they will be in school in 3 years....I will just have to wait!

You are not crazy for getting pregnant again. Enjoy every second of it....when your not feeling sick. This is your life! And they are only little once take advantage of being with them. 

Name: Irene | Date: Jan 31st, 2006 7:45 AM
Hi maree, sheena and kylie,
how are you girls, thanks heaps for youe honesty girls and your kindest and warm wishes, that really makes my day :-)
i only have support from my Mother but she lives too far away and doesnt drive, but when she does help she helps out heaps, shes my best friend!

as for everybody else , well theres no help there which you are right they have no right really to tell me what to do etc,

i will love this baby no matter what it is in the end, as long as baby is healthy and there are no compliacations, thats the most important thing, God has blessed me with this child and we should be happy with what we get,

i thank you girls so much for responding, i wasnt even going to check it today as i havent had any replys, but something told me to get on before i switch off and im glad i did,

where are you girls from,
how many kids you have and are any of you pregnate?

look forward to next time seeing you on here,
take care and God bless all of you,
cee ya xxx 

Name: Angela G | Date: Jan 31st, 2006 8:24 AM

I'm happy to see that you are feeling better! I'm happy so many people replied to you, when I went through the same thing your going through I had no were to turn and no one to really talk to.The ladies are great here!

I have five kids, ages 11, 10, 8 , 4 and I'm not prego now, but I was 7 months ago, my baby just turned 7 months last week! :0) We are from Reno, Nevada. 

Name: Irene | Date: Jan 31st, 2006 8:32 AM
HEY Angela,
how are you,
havent seen you in here for a while,
it does feel good to get help in here, the ladies in here are sooo nice, i love coming on and seeing replys, its so exciting,
wow 5 kids, you are very busy arent you!

i gotta get my youngest in bath and bed,
congratulations on your little one,
take care and God bless
have a great and safe week,
see ya xx 

Name: Paula | Date: Jan 31st, 2006 5:27 PM

I think it's wonderful that you are having another baby! Too many people are closed to allowing God bring life into their marriages, and many marriages suffer because of it.

I am saying these things because from some of your postings it sounds like you have some sort of faith in God, remember this will see you through the difficult times. Remember God has a hand in the life of all of us. When the naysayers in your life start to wear you down, remember that God knows better then they.

God has a plan for your new little one. We all contribute to society, you new baby is a blessing not only for you, but for them even if they choose not to recognize it. And also, your wonderful little one is a gift from you, as well as from God, to the rest of the whole world!

From one distant part of that world, I thank you. 

Name: Irene | Date: Jan 31st, 2006 7:08 PM
Hi Paula,
wow thank u soooo much for that,
i so love this forum, ive such awesome people in a week than i have in my whole life,
and you paula are another one of those girls,
i do feel blessed and im so happy that you have picked up my faith in the Lord, were all here for pourpose, that is true and same goes for my little one, and they soon(families) will see why this little one is a blessing also,
some ppl are just being decieved, its not their fault, i was there once also,
i have alot of faith and ill keep serving him in any way i can, it comes out naturally when i do now though, ive been a christian for 19 months, best thing we ever did both hubby and i, i must say it hasnt been easy, But we wouldnt have it any other way, but life with God is the best way!

once again thank you, and take care

keep the faith and God bless you xx 

Name: Stephanie Bush | Date: Jan 31st, 2006 7:20 PM
nope that is you and your husbands discion not the familys. I think if you guys wanted it go for it love matters to me more than money, I say that because we have more love than any thing right at the moment, just making it by! 

Name: mommy to be | Date: Feb 4th, 2006 8:17 AM
I am tired of feeling so alone. my husband pisses me off more than he maks me smile PLEASE HELP ME 

Name: Sara | Date: Feb 4th, 2006 5:33 PM
No you are not crazy....loves grows with each child!

You have your priorities straight -- Loving those kids first.

Remember you can't take the stuff with you when you die but you can take all those precious memories.

God doesn't care how much we had-- just how much we loved.

God Bless you and don't let anyone take away from you all the joy those little ones bring. 

Name: Irene | Date: Feb 14th, 2006 8:00 AM
Hi ladies,
tahnk you all so much for all your replies, it means alot to me for all your kind words and support,
im feeling slightly better now which is great, but i still have my days but im sure it will get better soon..
so once again thank you and take care and God bless xx 

Name: Helene | Date: Feb 15th, 2006 8:12 AM
I dont think ur crazy, We had the same problem but they thought we started too young, and every pregancy nobody was happy, i would have had a fourth cuz i like even numbers but when my 3rd was almost 2, i found out my middle son had cystic fibrosis, so i didnt want to risk havin another cf child wasnt fair, so i stopped at 3, good luck to u, and ya we struggle to but nuttin can buy love, :) all ya need 

Name: ROHIT | Date: Mar 8th, 2006 9:32 AM

Name: becuase | Date: Mar 8th, 2006 10:54 AM

Name: Debra | Date: Mar 8th, 2006 1:57 PM
Irene- i have 3 and my husband is at a close 40,000 per year and I only work 16 hours a week around his schedule. We juggle paycheck to paycheck- okay what are we going to pay this week- and what can we put off for another 2 weeks. We have no money, no room in the house- and I want another one! Oh- and i"m 38!! and completely out of shape!! (I use to always get back into shape before I got pregnant again- kind of an oxy moron-) and oh my god- I could just see the look on my families faces if I did. My kids would be incredibly excited. My husband is giving me one year to get over this- and if I still want one then he said we could. he just wants to make sure it is not some hormonal thing I am going through. Plus it gives me time to adjust to going back into the workforce. Sometimes I think that I have been a mom so long that its all I know so thats why my mind and heart is saying have another. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt- because honestly sometimes I think he knows what I want before I even do. But if you are considered crazy- I'm right there with ya girl!!! Save a straight coat for me!!! Although I look better in white in the summer so wait until then so I can get a tan!!! LOL 

Name: Irene | Date: Mar 8th, 2006 5:34 PM
Lol, you cracked me up Debra,
thank you sooo so much, I needed to hear that with all that is going on at present time,
and I;ll say it again, you are one of the sweetest ladies on here...
all the best and take care..
God bless :-) 

Name: Debra | Date: Mar 8th, 2006 5:56 PM
Thanks for the compliment- I'll have to tell my husband when he gets home so he can roll his eyes at me and he can say "Tell Irene to live with you- then we'll see how sweet you are!"

Oh and I forgot to say congradultions on your pregnancy. My sister's friend had 6 boys and went by the chinese calendar?? for determining the best time for you to copulate- to increase your chances of a girl- so if this one doesn't work tell your husband I told you to try following the chinese calendar and have a fifth!! I'm sure he'll love that! 

Name: Irene | Date: Mar 9th, 2006 7:50 AM
Lol, a 5th wow, well we will have to wait and see, I mean I'm not getting any younger so hey whats 4 whats 5 right.....yeah right lmao,
your very welcome about the compliment, and tell your hubby that i think your sweet no matter what lol,
anyway where abouts are you,
I'm in OZ world lol, but I think you already knew that from my poem cause it says it there,
anyway got to get going, oh was it you that gave me the advice on our Realtor?
I'm thinking of sueing him, because since the last ordael, its gotten worse.
Argggh, I really do not need anymore stress in my life.
take care debra& God bless 

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