21 weeks Today marks 21 weeks of pregnancy! There has been ups and downs, but most of the time I've felt amazing and have had a good support group of family and friends.
I now know that I'm expecting a baby boy, and though I do still want to have a daughter at some point, I'm very excited at the prospect of having a son. I've been kicking around the name Charlie... and it feels like the best name Dan & I have found so far. Charles Xavier Pepin... maybe! Charles Xavier is 'Professor X' in Marvel comics' X-Men series. He is amazing, very smart and caring and powerful. I love the idea of having my son outside my body and I can't wait to meet him.
Ever since 19 weeks I've been feeling him move around! He is especially frisky after I eat, and I love knowing that he's in there, safe and sound and enjoying the fruits (literally) of my labor so far in growing him. I'm trying to be as healthy as I can be and every doctor's visit has been pleasant and I've had no issues to speak of.
Every person that asks me how I'm doing is amazed when I tell them that, frankly, I feel great! My lower back does hurt if I over-exert myself, but I try to keep my crazy cleaning sprees and bending over to a minimum.
Terese and Susan are planning a baby shower for me in the coming months, and I'm very excited for that! I want to have a jungle theme, as I'm thinking a Lion King mural in baby's room would be awesome. Susie and Brad have agreed to help paint the mural, and it would be even easier if we got a projector to project the image onto the wall first.
The house we moved into a couple of weeks ago is really coming together, and although it's not decorated yet, I'm very happy to have a home of my own with my loving husband Dan. I know he will be the best husband and father to our family, and I'm so happy with him. He makes my life worth living, and being able to give him a son and raise you together brings me great joy.
Know that you will be loved immensely and that you were planned and we created you out of our love and joy for each other.
2016-07-17 (5 weeks)
5 weeks - 3 days I have known that I am pregnant since week 4, so about a week and a couple of days. Dan and I are thrilled but it's very frustrating to me that I can't tell people yet. We had a big cookout at Terese's house today, and so many of my family members were there:
Mom, Dad, Chris, Diane & Justin, T&T&T&T, Nana, Auntie D, Uncle Jim & Aunt Chrissy & Eden, Uncle Bill and Kristen, me and Dan. This is the majority of the Forbes Clan that I would tell that I am pregnant, but I must keep quiet. Diane even asked me today if I was pregnant yet, and I had to lie and say no, that I was still trying. She said that we should get pregnant together, but that she was sad that we lived so far away from each other. I told her she should 'get on that' to get pregnant.. Would she be angry with me if she knew that I was already pregnant? Or would she be happy for me?
I am feeling a bit alone in this, as I can't tell a majority of the people in my life yet, and sometimes I feel like I don't have anyone to share my feelings and thoughts with. Dan helps where he can, but I still feel alone in this. It is my body that is growing this baby, my health decisions that directly affect this baby. I may be only 5 weeks along but I have already been experiencing many early pregnancy symptoms, like 'morning sickness' that cruelly comes at any point during the day and lasts as long as it wants to. I'm constipated as well and sometimes now nothing else better describes my body feelings as well as the simple statement: 'I feel pregnant.'
I know that I will have a good support group once I reach 12 weeks and am able to tell my family, but until then it doesn't really feel real. Isn't the definition of real, something that you can see and feel and hear and touch and that its existence is validated? I look at baby names online and read books about baby's growth progression and it still doesn't feel real. I think I am, but I'm not positive if I'm ready for this. This will be the biggest change in my life, and my life will never be the same. I guess it's time to stop thinking so much about myself and start thinking about this life I am creating.