hiya, i dunno where to start, i'm 27 with 3 kids 9yr old girl (angel) 6 nearly 7 yr old boy (chaos) and a 6 month old little boy. my middle child has been a problem since he was 18 months old and has progressivly got worse, we were referred by the doctor to get him statemented, we had ONE meetin with them and have heard nothin since, that was over a yr ago! i kinda got used to just livin with his condition (waatever that mayb), but lately is has got to the point where i wanna pack my bags and leave my family (this aint depression). my 7 yr old will fight with anyone and everyone swears at whoever and will not abide by rules, please dont think i don't disapline him as i've run outta options on that level, (he's currently sat in his empty,bar his bed, room after punchin his sister for no reason other than she wanted her ds!). I really cant take much more and need someone to point me in the right direction before this family falls apart at the seams. any response will b read and helpfull
Thanks Shell ↓
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| Name: gumball | Date: Mar 8th, 2008 1:28 PM |
| oh i hear ya girl,...it seems all too familuar,...been there,..done it,..and still going thru it with my 11 year old,...im so glad i have this major feather pillow i can scream in to release the tension built up in me when things r at its worst,......but apart from the "the hairy" moments i found that my son was at his worst when he was your sons age,....i dont know if its a "normal stage" they go thru at that age of being defiant,.agressive,..frustrated and lashing out because of lack of self controll,....my son gradually had to learn self controll on his own "like we all do" and it took years of self diciplin. as he is diagnosed adhd and not on meds as i chose not to. but i tell ya girl,...i spent years on end fighting with the "system" and not giving up when it came to seeking help for him "getting analized" and diagnosed,....let alone comprimizing with the teachers at school that stigmetized my son as an imposible child,.....im still fighting that war. anyways,...all im trying to say is keep nagging and stand your ground concerning getting help for your boy,....you do have rights and so does your son. even tho i went thru hell and high waters for years trying to get a diagnosage,......i didnt give up. so put your boxing gloves on girl! and demand help, your intiteled it. i hope things work out for you as i do so relate to what your going thru....................................good luck ↑ |
| Name: hellsbells2580 | Date: Mar 8th, 2008 2:19 PM |
| gumball thanks for ur words of encouragment, it just seems noone listens to a mother who knows here child aint like the rest, i'm gonna make an appointment tomorrow at the doc's for him and get him refered again and hope that this time we'll get further than b4, i would appreciate it if we could keep in touch e-mail me @ [email protected] if u would 2 thanks again ↑ |
| Name: gumball | Date: Mar 8th, 2008 3:09 PM |
| great to hear!,...i noted down your email addr. and ill jot u aline or two,....my email addr. is" [email protected]" so u know who i am.lol. by the way i wote a topic yesterday called "to med. or not to med." if you get the chance or interested in what i think of adhd "the positive sides of it" then give it a go girl! thanks for relpying me,....i really do appreciate having someone to chatt with concerning this condition,.............ttyl..............chiao chicki ↑ |
| Name: gumball | Date: Mar 8th, 2008 4:23 PM |
| hei geil!,...i tried to send u an email but it failed to go thru,........did i get the addr. right? ↑ |
| Name: Hellsbells2580 | Date: Mar 11th, 2008 10:01 AM |
| Hiya gumball, the addy is [email protected] dunno if this was the one u had or not lol.. yeah i gave ur article a read b4 i posted and it does make u think about things differently, unfortunatly i haven't been able to take him to the doctors as i've been up since sat mornin with the baby ( damn teeth) and i really do need some sleep b4 i can think about tellin the doc to take his finger outta his ass and help me! hope to hear from u soon and i know wat u mean about havin someone to talk to xx ↑ |
| Name: gumball | Date: Mar 11th, 2008 9:17 PM |
| hei girl! i left u an email sent to the right addr this time,...lol jot me a line or two whenever,.....and good luck with the teething. chiao chicki,.... gumball... ↑ |
| Name: mom2nadhdson | Date: Mar 11th, 2008 11:26 PM |
| HELLSBELL , YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS , IM A SINGLE MOM I HAVE 1 SON 8 YRS OLD , HE HAS SEVER ADHD ODD OCD ANGER MOOD SWINGS !!!!!! LET TELL YA GIRL ITS VERY HARD TO DEAL WITH HE ALSO HAS EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS AS WELL ........WHAT DOES YOUR SON HAVE AND HOW DOES HE ACT OUT ANGER ↑ |
| Name: hellsbells2580 | Date: Mar 12th, 2008 9:49 AM |
| hey, my son (Aidan) has been statemented/ diagnosed officially yet, but he has horrid mood swings over the smallest of things, has very few friends cause he is so aggressive and can b extremly violent (see my adhd son is driving me crazy), i've sent my oldest child (an angel compared to him) to school with black eyes bald patches in her hair bruises etc all from him and this was when he was only 3! he doesnt care wat punishment u give him and if he is defiant enough he'll even run upstairs put all his toys outside his room n go "now wat u gonna do???" he wont lash out at me or his dad or his baby brother but everyone else he will and dont care, i've told him i will call the cops on him for assult and he dont care, i've let him see me cry to see if that would make him think but it dont, he has absolutly no fear of anythin and thinks it would b funny if he got hit by a car! he's been like this since he was 18 months old and i dunno how much more i can take, i've got 3 kids to look after not just 1! ↑ |
| Name: GOINCRAZYSONLEAVEMEALONE | Date: Mar 12th, 2008 3:59 PM |
WOW, I wish there was a community just for adhd/ odd or light autism kids to live. Think of the understanding parents would be and the fact my son could actually have friends that understand him (or that could even stand him hahah) I fell bad for him cause regardless of how many kids have this/ adults it almost makes you think there isulated in a different world and you just want him to come through to this world and have the behavior stop like: screaming all the time, voice control, aggression to stop, lack of compassion , bad communication or none at all, negitive thoughts, Anxiety ,
I just ask my kids to respect me and be nice to each other..
Is that so hard 2 do those 2 simple things?
my son is almost 12 (adhd/ODD/ autism) daughter 10 (honor student and easy to handle) daughter 6 ( able to handle and is lovey dovey) I know I am strick ...Ms. Rules..but I am a good mom and I will even physically play wrestle my kids if there appropriate about not hurting someone in the process....yep I am a good mom.... but boy do you ever have those times when you break down and pray to god about the fact you have bad thoughts of wishing your child would just go away forever (not died) but anywhere other than with you or you might really hurt him.
My son laughs at me when I get mad sometimes (almost evil) my other children gasp in disbelief of his his attitude towards me or rules in general. anyones rules.
Parenting is hard i get that and then there is "Parenting gone Wild" no one talks about that video. LOL.
adhd/odd or austim children are different to parent.
you need to tolerate more than expected and be looked at by other parents or doctors or teachers as NOT DOING IT THE RIGHT WAY is it was them. (cause all of us have our opinions)
or because you didnt tolerated more, and be lashed at for not caring!
able to deal with lots of negitivity and always trying or feeling like you are ment to believe in winning a losing battle? why cant he just mature out of adhd or deal with his own issues yet? hahah, I can only pray I am leading him in the right path . ↑ |
| Name: Heather | Date: Mar 12th, 2008 5:48 PM |
Hi Shell,
I understand just how you feel and what you are going through!My son is 5 yrs old and has ADHD and I went h%^@ for 3 yrs and still am.Not only is it me, it is also my daughter who is 12 and the step-father. I am 39 yrs old and my stress level has been pushed to the max. About 6 months ago I almost walked out. I finally had to go to my Dr and tell him how I was feeling..He put me on anti-depress medication right away.Informed me that I had better seek some kind of help with my son. I have so much to say about his condition. Day after day we suffer and I am concerned about my daughter as I feel she is starting to hate her brother very much. I would not like to see my daughter on medication because of this. But there is so much stress !!!! :( We cannot enjoy outings as a family as he is so high strung.. I am lost... I can understand and feel for you and your family. I can understand why some mothers have walked out..It is very hard with a child or even children with ADHD. My daughter is a strait A student with no problems..I ask myself where did I go wrong. I did manager to find out that my son father also has ADHD, and this is where it rooted from. I will watch for post's from you as it would be really nice to chat with someone who also suffer's from issue's. Please take care and be strong :) We have to be thankful that our children are not deathly ill , etc... ↑ |
| Name: To all from me | Date: Mar 12th, 2008 5:58 PM |
| If anyone would like to chat via e-mail, please feel free to do so.. I would love to have a friend to talk chat with about everyday problems.. Dr has suggested that just talking about things helps :) [email protected] ↑ |
| Name: dallas05 | Date: Mar 13th, 2008 6:28 AM |
| I certainly feel for you as I also have an ADD child and she is now 24 and doing great. Hang in there, there is light at the end of the tunnel. I have recently discovered a nutritional supplement that works wonders for the mood swings and numerous other problems . If you need further info, my address is [email protected] It is tough to get an accurate diagnosis and to get the kids to take meds is nearly impossible and of course you have to worry about side effects too. Have faith, things will get better.....be persistent. Your family deserves to have things more calm and to be able to enjoy each others company. Good luck and God Bless. ↑ |
| Name: gumball | Date: Mar 13th, 2008 10:00 AM |
| God bless ya girly,...of all the times i wanted to haul of n give the "system" a mighty good clout up the side the head for not listening to me concerning my son thru out his childhood, blessed savior! but it wouldnt take them a split second to pick up the phone and complain that were not doing a good enough job as parents tho,......instead of listening to us theyd rather complain about us,......... stand your ground girl! who are they to judge and assume that your lad has "chosen" to b the the way he is? that really poisens me to hear that bcause ive heard the same about my boy from the schools,....and my dear! when he finally got diagnosed adhd u should have seen the shame on their faces. so u listen girl......im proud of you,....proud that your standing your ground and not giving up,....even tho its a long and hard struggle........ your still fighting,.....give yourself some credit and b proud of yourself too.............your a great mom! YOU GO GIRL! ↑ |
| Name: hellsbells2580 | Date: Mar 13th, 2008 5:40 PM |
| hey all i must firstly say sorry for the rather large amount of txt i wrote yesterday but as u could prob tell it hasnt been a good week, today hasnt been to bad and Aidan even managed to behave enough allowin him to go to the school disco, wat made me laugh was his teachers response to his good behaviour and i quote "amazin how good he can b when its for somethin fun!" OMG WOMAN..... this is comin from the teacher that teaches the other special kids in his school!!!!!!! i'm bloody sorry he dont behave 24/7 EXACTLY how u want him 2 but hey he wont even WALK to school so how do u expect him 2 sit in a classroom with 7 other kids that r the same as him (adhd,add,autistic,learnin difficulties etc)!!! sometimes i wonder if they ever actually know wat they r doin, i mean they expect Aidan to sit down do phonics and maths with no problems HELLO LOVE DID U NOT HEAR ME SAY HE HAS ISSUES WITH SITTIN DOWN WORKIN!!!!! i will now make an amendement.. in the comment made by myself after mom2nadhdson i say he has been statemented/diagnosed officially yet wat it meant to say was he hasn't yet been diagnosed officially, although there is a pyschologist guy that goes into his school that has known Aidan since he was 2/3 and he will tell u that Aidan aint (i hate this word) "normal". anyway one thin i would like from all of u is say examples of ur childs behaviour BEFORE they were on meds (if they are indeed on meds) . i have done alot of readin up on this but some things are very confusin. oh and no offence but please don't start tellin me about meds and side effects just yet we aint got that far yet lol although i dont think it will b long b4 i'm askin for help in that area. again please keep talkin it really does help i know it helps me when i'm down to come here and read a message like gumball's latest post tellin me i aint mad or doin anythin wrong....anyway baby wants his t so best go do it lmao take care of urselves and love the lovin moments ur children give u ( i know how rare they come)!!!! x ↑ |
| Name: hellsbells2580 | Date: Mar 13th, 2008 5:41 PM |
| again sorry for the big post lol i just cant seem to stop when i start lmao ↑ |
| Name: gumball | Date: Mar 13th, 2008 8:16 PM |
| good on ya girl!,.....i like the fighstyness in ya! now youve got your "boxing gloves" on! keep them on girly,....itll get u far. yeah and that comment the school psychologist said about "normal" i mean who can really define normal? surely not him,.....whats normal and what isnt normal? are we all suppose to be like a zombified flock of sheep following the "want to be psychologists" (and teachers) to what defines as"their" normal? what a jeesless boreing bunch we would b if we did. so all im saying is that he had no right to say that your lad isnt "normal" we are all unike,..we are all diffrent.....and we are are normal in our own way. if the psychologist was so eager to stigmatize your lad as not "normal"? then how come he isnt doing his job by testing and diagnosing him instead of assumeing and judgeing? go figure..... make no wonder i dont trust the system,....its judgemental people like that that dont have the time of day for empathy or understanding that kills the trust........so keep up your fighstyness Shell,....stand your ground and dont let no judjemental "want to be" tell u otherwize,...cause just by saying what he did made himself unworthy as a shrink in my eyes. ↑ |
| Name: gumball | Date: Mar 13th, 2008 8:26 PM |
| ps.....Shell,....if he knew your lad since he was 2-3,....y didnt he test him? assumtions wont do it,...it wont get him the help he is intiteled to at school if your gonna get help nowadays from the schools,..then they demand a diagnosage,....or else they just keep judgeing. ↑ |
| Name: uluru | Date: Apr 22nd, 2008 10:40 AM |
hi i went through all this 3 years ago with my son, just chek out my page on squidoo, adhd "raising connor" 2 c how i coped,
i put my son on eye q made by equezen and it really helped, its only fish oils but trust me it could do the trick, my son takes 6 to 10 a day depending how he feels, hope this info works for you,
hang in there your not alone. ↑ |
| Name: simpi | Date: May 5th, 2008 4:26 AM |
| 123 magic dr thomas phelan, video and books probably in your local library. not perfect but will help ask school system for help testing ↑ |
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