So up until the past 3 months, my ex has claimed that he has been unemployed to try to avoid paying childsupport. Fortunately for me, they ordered him to pay support based on if he were working a minimum wage job. This entire time he had been working under the table for his Brother for $15 an hour, no way to prove it though....believe me I tried. His soon to be wife freaked out recently when he HAD to get a legitimate job because his brother was moving out of state and quiting the business. His new job has medical benefits and everything! I have been covering the kids on my benefits with the verbal agreement that when he got a job with benefits he would put them on his. Well.....nothing. In fact he had the nerve to call me and beg me not to have the support modified because his fiance was really stressed that I would make him pay for more. And then on top of all that, upon arrival of a pick up with the kids, she informs me they wouldn't be putting the kids on the medical because it would cost $500 a month! Ummm....last I checked my ex was the Daddy fo my kids not her! So what I was told I needed to do was get a legal parenting time plan in place(which is actually his responsibility) and then present it to the Child Support agency and have the medical and the support modified.
The really sad part of all this is that had he offered to help out with co pays, medical bills, dental bills, clothes, and other school/sports stuff, I wouldn't be goign after thim for more. but GEEZ! How long should I be giving him to step up and be equally responsible for our children? I have been supporting them on my own for over 5 1/2 years! Four and a half of those my now husband has been helping! He and his soon to be wife both work good paying full time jobs....what's the problem here? ↓
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| Name: Lory | Date: Nov 8th, 2006 4:06 AM |
| verbal agreements? Nothing! Think about the kids!!! ↑ |
| Name: Lory | Date: Nov 8th, 2006 4:45 AM |
| Ugh! what do ya think the prob is! YOUR A FAKE????!!!! HEHE LOL I trly pry 4 u! omg, life sucks 4 me. i dnt gt wht i neded as a chld. u dsrve 2 b caled out!!!!!!! stp caln peops OUT!!!!!!! ↑ |
| Name: billy22 | Date: Nov 8th, 2006 5:12 PM |
| I guess I don't understand what you mean. How can you call me a fake when all I am trying to do is come on here to get some advice from someone who may be have been through this before...how discouraging that a person can't come to a support site and get some POSITIVE feedback rather than get tore down even more by someone who obviously has issues of their own,,,sad sad sad:( ↑ |
| Name: tweetybird4 | Date: Nov 8th, 2006 8:27 PM |
Hi billy22---I don't know what's going on under these posts with some of the comments but if you can try to ignore the negative ones, please do so. There are some good people on this forum that don't create tension like this so just try to ignore it and stick it out. Ok.
Anyways, I wouldn't let your ex off the hook so easy just because his wife gets her feathers ruffled. That's too bad for her!! Yes, you are right, they are your ex's kids too and he needs to help be responsible for them. Forget about what the girlfriend/wife says, it's not her call, they are not her kids. I'm sorry but I wouldn't give in on this one. I would make sure he helps out no matter what. Don't sell yourself so short. You deserve the help from him. ↑ |
| Name: Lizzi | Date: Nov 8th, 2006 8:36 PM |
| If you have sole custody then why do you let him have anything to do with the kids at all? Isn't sole custody almost the same as him not having any rights to the kids?Why put yourself through chaos you don't have to is all I'm saying. If you are already used to taking care of the kids yourself without his help then continue to do so and leave him and his wacko girlfriend out of your life and the kids' lives. What kind of role model will he be for them anyway beings he's been in prison and all? Plus he's hooked up with a nutcase! ↑ |
| Name: billy22 | Date: Nov 8th, 2006 8:44 PM |
| Thanks Again Tweety and Lizzy~ You two are awesome support for me on here! In my state(or it could be the county laws) even if you have sole custody, the father has parenting time rights. So that's what I have given him....the minimum and that's it. I am truly hoping and praying that either A)things will get better and we can all get along or B) the kids will figure out that their Dad isn't all he claims to be. I am praying for the more positive choice:) thanks again for the positive feedback, I was feeling like maybe I was being ran off for reasons I STILL have no idea about! WEIRD! ↑ |
| Name: tweetybird4 | Date: Nov 8th, 2006 9:17 PM |
| billy22---Again, ignore the attempts to run you off. Although, I don't think things will get better with the girlfriend/wife. She sounds like a real piece of work. So, you are in control of the whole situation. Yes, you have sole custody and yes, you have to allow your ex to have time with the children but you can monitor that time. Don't let the ex get the best of you. This is what she is looking to do---cause trouble. Just hold your head up high with a smile. Remember, you did nothing wrong. All your trying to do and you seem to be doing a wonderful job at it, is raising two wonderful children. Keep up the good work and do what you think is right. ↑ |
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