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My cousin is 16 almost 17 and she is pregnant. She went to the Doctor yesterday and she is between 6 to 8 weeks. Before she found out she actually was preg she was saying she wants to keep her baby. Now that she knows it's really true she wants an abortion. She has looked at the pictures on the internet, but she really wants it done. Her boyfriend says he wants to keep it. My cousin thinks he's going to run out on her when she has the baby because it would be to much to handle. Hubby and I have tried to convince her that it's not the babies fault. She doesn't know that I'm pregnant again. My cousin and I are around the same weeks pregnant and I feel so bad. The sad part is her 15 year old sister had an abortion last month. My cousin isn't going to tell her mother. It wouldn't matter because her mom persuaded her sister into havin the abortion. Any help on how I can prevent her from doing this? ↓
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| Name: devsmom | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 3:38 PM |
| sorry to offend people- i know i am about to, but if that is what she wants, i believe she should.....she is young and if she truley believes she cannot do it- then-... wer'nt you just saying you were going to have one??? ↑ |
| Name: jeffnjasharstad | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 3:38 PM |
| I don't know how to help you on this one, but do let her know there is adoption...this way she can give the baby life. It's much better than an abortion. Many couples out there can't have children that'd be honored to adopt her baby. ↑ |
| Name: devsmom | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 3:44 PM |
good luck for you, and your family........life is hard sometimes.
lots of babies!! ↑ |
| Name: MOMMY_2_BE | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 3:53 PM |
| I have never respected a woman who has an abortion just because she doesnt want it. I dont believe in abortion at all. It's just like murder in my eyes. This young lady thought she was mature enough to have unprotected sex, knowing she had a risk of getting pregnant and OMG, she did. I agree with jeffnjasharstad...Tell her about adoption.....Its not the baby's fault and it shouldnt be taken out on it either. Her pregnancy happened for a reason and GOD intended for her to have that baby. She needs to grow up a little bit and realize she made a mistake and deal with it the right way ↑ |
| Name: bmes | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 3:57 PM |
| if she didn't want a baby she should have kept her legs closed. abortion should only be an option for rape victims and not just an easy way out for immature little girls. There IS adoption!!! give the baby a chance!! who made her god? ↑ |
| Name: tubbybubble | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 4:08 PM |
| i totally disagree with abortion also...unless rape victims. when i was interning in school at this ob clinic, there was this18 yr old girl as a pt. there. she had had 3 abortions and was pregnant again..only this time she was keeping it. she was openly talking about it one day and said the reason why she had had those abortions. one reason was that she didn't want to look fat in her prom dress (can you believe that?) reason two was that she just didn't want the responiblity of caring for one, and three she wanted to drink and go out with her friends. can you say stupid b*tch?? i think abortions just make it easier for young girls to get away with being you know whats...i'm sorry if i offended anyone with that statement but it's my opinion. ↑ |
| Name: bmes | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 4:11 PM |
| i totally agree with you? ↑ |
| Name: bmes | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 4:19 PM |
| that wasn't supposed to be a question mark!!! ha ha ha!! ooops ↑ |
| Name: nicole miller | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 5:04 PM |
Ditto... abortion, in my oppinion, is the ulitimate in selfish acts. I understand that 9 months of pregnancy and a day of labor is no easy task... but that is less than 5% of that childs life. Most states have a 72 hours law.... a child can be relinquished to a medical professional, law enforcement officer, or fire fighter within 72 hours of birth - no questions asked - no consequences. If someone is "responsible" enough to have sex than they can give up 9 months of their life and give someone else 95% of the work at the VERY least.
Even that is hardly commendable... labor is pretty much done for you - your body will have the baby no matter what... the real work is providing and caring for a child. How rediculous is it to balk at just simply letting the child hang out in your body for a few months?
Not to sound predjudiced... but the cold hard truth is that it's not like she'd be sending her baby to the 'baby pound' or something. Drug-free caucasian newborns are literally BOUGHT in this country. Someone would have the paperwork nearly finished before she even hit the delivery bed... not to mention probably MORE than compensate her financially for her "trouble".
Sorry to go on and on there... but I always get a bit worked up over the subject. One of the few things I'm truly oppinionated about. ↑ |
| Name: mybabyboy | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 5:11 PM |
| My cousin doesn't want to do adoption. I just want to scream at her and give her piece of my mind, but if I do she will be very mad at me. She is such a hyprocrite she was telling me when I first found out I was pregnant with my first that abortion is wrong, God gave me this child for a reason, I'm going to regret later on, and It's not the babies fault. Then when her sister had her abortion she was talking so much crap about her, but look at what she is doing now. She should've thought about before spreading her damn legs that she could get pregnant. What pisses me of is that her boyfriend wants the baby and she is thinking negative. She keeps saying that they have been having problems and she doesn't want to raise the baby by herself. She says he is going to leave her once he sees how hard it is. I told her if her mom could do it and my mom did it she can too. Her mom had her when she was 15 and my mom had me when she was 17 and they raised us with our fathers weren't that much around. When I got pregnant I was 18 with a 16 year old mind and now so much has changed. I don't know how she doesn't feel guilty knowing that her belly is growing and it's because of her baby. ↑ |
| Name: tylersmom06 | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 5:14 PM |
| I agree with most everything the other ladies have said but however terrible it may seem, fact is its your cousin's decision. BUT she will be the one that has to live with that decision for the rest of her life. I think they counsel you before you get an abortion so maybe that will talk her out of it if it comes down to it. If not then there is really nothing anyone can do! ↑ |
| Name: bmes | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 5:18 PM |
| Well she can't have an abortion unless the father of the baby consents to it right? i thought I heard that somewhere...if not, can't the parents stop her, with her being the age she is? i thought 18 was the age when you can finally make your own decision without a legal guardian..or maybe the laws are different here! ↑ |
| Name: mybabyboy | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 5:36 PM |
| They already spoke to her and she decided it. Her hubby is going to do what she wants even though he says he doesn't want to. I thought she needed her mom to do the abortion, but come to find out she just needs someone is is 19 with a id. He hubby is 19 so I guess he is going to sign to approve it. ↑ |
| Name: bmes | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 5:39 PM |
| some people are so selfish...it just disgusts me.... :-( ↑ |
| Name: missheather | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 9:38 PM |
| I think you need to be as supportive as possible. This is a confusing time for her. I suggest the two of you spend some time together away from everyone else's opinions and help her think through it without condemning her. I believe she will have problems later on both physically and emotionally if she has an abortion. What she needs right now is help. She also needs to see the miracle of the child inside of her. It is easier for her to think of abortion right now because she can't feel or see her baby. Be patient with her, she's young and confused. ↑ |
| Name: sweet tomorrow | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 9:48 PM |
| i think you just need to be there for her.. And let her know the facts. She sees you doing it with your little boy. Show her what it's like. And sorry to say it, but you can't stop her from doing something she wants to. And you force it upon her, she may resent you ↑ |
| Name: sunshine | Date: Feb 22nd, 2007 9:51 PM |
| i dont realy agree with abortion, but if she feels its right for her then there is not much you can do but support her but just show her its not the end of the world that shes pregnant but also let her know its her choice at the same time ↑ |
| Name: briseis | Date: Feb 23rd, 2007 2:08 PM |
| I was adopted. It's a complex issue. Adoption means her going through 9 months of pregnancy, missing school, losing the respect of her family, all the illness and stress pregnancy involves. I know. I'm pregnant! It can be very difficult to go through 9 months of pregnancy only to give the baby away, knowing that it may possibly resent you for not wanting it someday. I resent my biological family! She's very young to go through that kind of stress. She's very early on in her pregnancy, and abortion is always an option, and although a moral and ethical matter, a very simple procedure which could be over with in a day, allowing her to get on with her life and perhaps learn her lesson. I neither agree nor disagree with abortion. But I don't believe we have any right to go on this site criticising others for the choices they make in their own lives. If you don't agree with abortion then so be it. Never have one. But don't tell others what to do. You have no right to do that, no matter what you believe. ↑ |
| Name: devsmom | Date: Feb 23rd, 2007 2:21 PM |
| maybe if you do tell her you are also pregnant- again, and tell her you, along with other family will be there for her and baby. thay will love the baby and im sure try to help out as much as possibale! the baby will also be very close in age to yours, so things can be shared, and the children can bond. you 2 could really help eachother out. emotionally and financially (babysit for eachother).... ↑ |
| Name: mybabyboy | Date: Feb 23rd, 2007 3:41 PM |
| What I'm against is the reason she is having the abortion. She has reasons, but the one that really matters is just because she thinks her bf isn't going to be there for her. So she decides to kill her baby for that. My cousin and I are jsut about the same weeks I guess that's why it bothers me so much. I want to tell her that I'm pregnant, but she has a big mouth and all the wrong people will know. I'm a private person and I hate when people know my business. I know she is going to regret it later. I have known people who get depressed and can't get over it. I'm just trying to make her see that it's wrong and so she won't go through the pain. I just told her she shouldn't do it and I told her my reasons. I'm not going crazy saying that she can't do it. I told her if she keeps the baby I will be there for her because I know how it is, but she has made up her mind. I just hope when she arrives to her appointment she turns back. ↑ |
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