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| Name: Tara | Date: Feb 26th, 2006 2:04 PM |
| my sister has had 2 abortions, and there isnt a day that goes by that she doesnt wish she had her babies. how old are you, and have you ever considered adoption. i was adopted, and i couldnt love my parents any more. adoption would be the best choice. ↑ |
| Name: Becci | Date: Feb 26th, 2006 2:24 PM |
| I will be 18 in June, and yes i've considered adoption. I'm keeping all my options open. Im just looking for first hand input on this topic for now :) ↑ |
| Name: Jess | Date: Feb 26th, 2006 3:19 PM |
| Hi Becci, I have never had an abortion as I can't have children, but my sister and some of my friends have and they too regret it. It was a lot harder than they anticipated both physically and emotionally. I also helped a friend be able to pay for one and now in my situation I have doubts surrounding that decision. It probably depends on your age though and how informed you are. No matter what it is your decision to make and you have the right to make whatever choice is right for you. Jess www.achild2love.com ↑ |
| Name: Anne-Marie | Date: Feb 26th, 2006 4:30 PM |
| Hey Becci. I have never had an abortion but have had 5 miscarriages so have felt the loss of a baby and it's devestating effects both emotionally but also physically. The body has a hard time getting used to not being pregnant all of a sudden and the hormones, in my case, still surge through the body. This is such a difficult decision for any woman to make and I sincerely wish you all the luck and strength in the world in making it as either way you have it for life. One one hand you have a potentially unwanted pregnancy but possibly the best thing that has ever happened to you and on the other a guilt filled life sentence of wonder and emptiness. All I can say to you is I hope you make the choice that is long term the most viable for your health and happiness. Take care x x x ↑ |
| Name: dot | Date: Feb 26th, 2006 4:37 PM |
| My best friend had one and a neice had one and both say there isn't a day that goes by they don't think about what they chose to do. Both said, after they had a child, they regretted it even more and it haunts them out of the blue at times. They say it's very hard knowing they chose to kill their child. Both say now they would have adopted the baby out. ↑ |
| Name: Sarah | Date: Feb 27th, 2006 1:06 AM |
| Just google "post abortive stress syndrome" (PASS) and you will see what 75% women who have had abortions are suffering from. And those are just the ones that report their difficulties. Who knows how many of the remaining 25% are keeping silent. I have had 3 friends who have had abortions. One a victim of rape. All have PASS. ↑ |
| Name: Natalie | Date: Feb 27th, 2006 1:25 AM |
| Hey Becci, First of all, I just realized this past week that i'm expecting oct 24 of this year. I'm thinking the same what that you're thinking, and trust me, it isn't easy. I think another way to look at it is don't take the negative information that people give you, take the positive and figure out in the long run what would be the best for you and your child. Take Care. ↑ |
| Name: Anonymous | Date: Feb 27th, 2006 3:15 AM |
| Becci, Don't Dont You will hate yourself. I know. I had an abortion. I had always been pro-choice, and I was in college. I had so much I wanted to do and a baby just wasn't in the picture. Everyone kept telling me that it was just a bunch of cells, I was just over a month along. My boyfriend was real supportive, paid for half of my costs, and drove me to the hospital. We both knew we weren't ready to be parents. The clinic people treated me like I was just getting a procedure, like I was having a tumor removed or something. I didn't think anything of it. But as soon as it was done. I knew. I started crying really hard and the nurse told me to quiet down, that I was scaring a woman in the other room. She was so cold to me! I hated her then and I hate her now! I knew I killed my baby. And every day I know. There hasn't been one day that I haven't thought of it. My baby would have been 2 years old last October, and the emotional pain of what I did has never left me. All my girlfriends tell me I did the right thing, but I know I didn't. They never been through it so they don't know. I was so depressed after that I didn't care about school anymore and I dropped out. What right do I have to live when I took my own child's life? I can't talk to anyone about it. My family would kill me if they knew, and it hurts even more because they are so supportive of me now that I'm pregnant again. I have this terrible secret and the people who know think I'm just being stupid, and most won't talk to me anymore anyways, so I can't talk to anyone about it. My boyfriend left me because I got pregnant again and I won't have another abortion. He keeps getting mad at me about crying about it. He doesn't care that I killed our baby, and thinks I should just get over it, and that I am being selfish by not killing this baby. I realize now that he never really loved me. There are times I'm so depressed I want to kill myself, but I won't because I want this baby to live. I'm giving it up for adoption because I don't deserve to have a baby. My doctor is watching me really close because he says due to my abortion the placenta has a high chance of tearing off from my uterus. So not only did my abortion kill my first baby, but it is putting this baby in danger too. If I lose this one because of my abortion, I don't want to live! You're already pregnant. An abortion doesn't change the fact that you are pregnant, and it doesn't make anything go back to the way it was. If you have an abortion it's done, you can never make your baby alive again. My baby is due May 26th and I have my pick of couples who want my baby. I get to choose by reading about what they do for a living, where they live, even what religion they are. I get to pick how much interaction I have with my baby. There's mommys and daddys and grandpas and grandmas who all want the chance to love my baby. How could I have been so selfish before! I keep asking my baby to forgive me. Her name is Mykala. I just wish I let my Mykala have a chance. Don't kill your baby Becci, please. Let your baby have a chance to live and be happy and make others happy. ↑ |
| Name: nora | Date: Feb 27th, 2006 3:37 AM |
| do what you want. ↑ |
| Name: Nameless | Date: Feb 27th, 2006 5:20 PM |
| I cant tell you what you should do, But I can tell you what I have been through in my experience. I became pregnant unexpectedly about 2 years ago and already had three children. The relationship I was in was not going well at the time and when I found out I was pregnant I was devastated. After thinking it over for a while I decided that an abortion was what was best for me. I made the appointment. When I got to the clinic I was heckled by the protesters. This was just the begininng. Once inside I was packed in a waiting room chucked full of women waiting for an abortion. Anyways when it was finally my turn to go into the room, I was given local pain relieve and then the process began. I cried the whole time, not only because the pain was so bad but mostly because I just relaized then what was happening. I was 9 weeks at the time. Not one of the nurses in the room would comfort me nor did they attempt to comfort me in the recovery room. I was completely alone and so empty. I couldnt wait ot get out of there. It was a nightmare and I regret it every single day of my life. I suffer severe depression from the whole experience. Just know that if you do decide to have an abortion, its not all over after the abortion is performed, its only the begining. Just think long and hard about what is best for you. You are the only one who can answer that. I just wanted to let you know that its not this simple thing and your problems do not just go away when its done. I wish you luck in whatever you may decide. ↑ |
| Name: jenn | Date: Feb 27th, 2006 9:13 PM |
| i have lots of friends who have had abortions and they dont regret it one bit. even some who have had 3 abortions and dont regret it. i only have one friend who had 2 abortions and regrets it cause she dreams that her babies are jumping on her bed. but the rest were very happy with their decision. when i got pregnant i kind of felt like they were kind of pressuring me to do it, saying that it would be easy.... there is nothing to it....and i could just go on with my life... then the babys father said i had better have an abortion, cause he wasnt going to be a father... he was going to make an appointment and go and find me and take me there... i was so scared, as abortion is illegal in costa rica..and i really didnt want to.... but i felt like i should... and i was scared of what my parents would say since i wasnt married.... emotionally i was a wreck so i went in to talk to my doctor about what to do and how confused i was and there i found this little poem from a baby to his mama and it broke my heart... i was in costa rica so it was in spanish but it went something like this... hi mami! i am so happy to be here in your tummy! you made me about a month ago and boy am i so happy to be here!!!! i am getting bigger! i am so excited! hi mami i am now getting little hands and feet, i can play with my hands! i am so happy and excited i am the happiest baby in the whole world! but i sense you are not so happy mami, why is that? why do you cry at night? and why when you and papi see each other do you fight ? dont worry about me mami i am fine, and i know that everything is going to be okay, but something has me a little worried. yesterday you made an appointment with the doctor... is something wrong mami? well i hope you feel better! mami, here we are at the doctors office, do you feel sick? i feel fine! what are they doing mami? dont go to sleep! its early! what is that in my house? a toy for me to play with ??? ow thats my little leg! ouch that hurt! mami make them stop! ow you are pulling my leg off..!!!! mami please stop this!!! then the story goes on to say.... hola mami 18 years have passed since that day and i know you feel bad every day but dont feel bad mami i am here in heaven waiting for you with open arms and big hugs, sincerely, your baby. and there were pictures of little babies with angel wings on it and i just broke down and knew i couldnt do it and that the only reason i was even considering it was cause the father and my friends were pressuring me. of course, i know that that poem was written by a pro-lifer, and i def. consider myself pro-choice. what's right for one woman isnt right for another. but now im 7 months preg. and soooo happy and i just thank god every day that i didnt do anything stupid! my parents are even more excited than i am! and i thank god i read that little poem cause if i hadnt then who knows what i would have done as i was in such a unstable emotional state at the time... ↑ |
