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Name: briseis

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Men Are Just Happier People NICKNAMESIf Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura,Kate and Sarah .If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each otheras Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes. EATING OUTWhen the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in 20, eventhough it's only for 32.50.None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit theywant change back.When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. MONEYA man will pay 2 for a 1 item he needs.A woman will pay 1 for a 2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale. BATHROOMSA man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shavingcream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from M&S.The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items. ARGUMENTSA woman has the last word in any argument.Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. CATSWomen love cats.Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats. FUTUREA woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. SUCCESSA successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.A successful woman is one who can find such a man. MARRIAGEA woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does. DRESSING UPA woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the bins,answer the phone, read a book, and get the post.A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. NATURALMen wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.Women somehow deteriorate during the night. OFFSPRINGAh, children. A woman knows all about her children.She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favouritefoods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house. THOUGHT FOR THE DAYA married man should forget his mistakes.There's no use in two people remembering the same thing. ↓

Name: briseis | Date: Mar 11th, 2008 11:25 AM

Ack. That came out all wrong. Ignore the above

Men Are Just Happier People

NICKNAMES
If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura,Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each otheras Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in 20, eventhough it's only for 32.50.None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY
A man will pay 2 for a 1 item he needs.A woman will pay 1 for a 2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

BATHROOMS
A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shavingcream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from M&S.The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items. ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument.Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

CATS
Women love cats.Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

FUTURE
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the bins,answer the phone, read a book, and get the post.A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children.She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favouritefoods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes.There's no use in two people remembering the same thing. ↑

Name: blondiess4u | Date: Mar 11th, 2008 2:18 PM

That's funny! It's so true! ↑

Name: mother2five | Date: Mar 11th, 2008 3:07 PM

lol, funny!! ↑