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Name: Tanya
[ Original Post ]
Hello everyone. I just wanted to say that this chat is very helpful to me (I am new to this site) in understanding that I am not the only one dealing with an ADHD, possibly ODD child. My son will be 9 next month, and every day with him is a struggle. He argues non stop even over the most mandane things, never does what is asked of him right away, makes annoying noises and tortures his sister non stop. Most days he is bouncing off the walls. Mu husband traves a lot. so I am stuck home with 2 kids who drive me crazy. My daughter is great, has no ADHD and does what she is supposed to do at 5 years old. My son makes her hyper too and they run circles around me, literally! I hardly stay home with them on weekends because they mess up the whole house. We go places shere they can run around and let out steam, or to the movies, where they have to be quiet. A few times I took them to a grocery store where they have one of those free child care places-shile you shop. I just wondered around the store to get an hour of rest. Desperate. Thats me. Anyhow, if anyone has suggestions, or if you live in the Cleveland area, it would be nice to hear from you. I know that some of you have more them one child with ADHD, I don't know how you do it and stay sane. I feel like a bad Mom, like a am failing my son. I just don't know what to do to help him and me.
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Name: Chris | Date: Oct 27th, 2005 4:50 AM
I have a 17 year old son who does not have ADHD, but has ODD and is possibly cyclothymic. He, too, argues nonstop over trivial matters and is non-compliant. He is quite charming and deceptive with others. For years, we experienced problems with him at home, but could get no help because he could "charm" the professionals and had them believing that everyone else had the problem except him. With adolescence, however, his anger management problems worsened, and he assaulted a couple of other students at his high school. Thank heavens, we finally found a counselor who could see through some of the charm and deception. He referred us to a psychiatrist who would listen and he put him on respirdal. Although things are not perfect now, they are much calmer. He occasionally "forgets" to take his medication, and, after a couple of days, boy can we notice a difference! The arguing and tantrums start again. He still makes noises, as your son does, and we find that he is doing this just to annoy us. Sometimes, if we ignore this, it does get a little better. 

Name: Tanya | Date: Oct 27th, 2005 8:34 PM
Chris,

Thank you for your reply. I am in the process of finding a psychiatrist for my son. I hope he will come up with new ideas/meds because I just don't know where else to turn. 

Name: gr8maof3 | Date: Nov 1st, 2005 5:01 PM
Sister ........ I know of where you speak.. I am in the same boat.. my son is 9 my oldest is 12 and I have a 5 year old daughter.. my 9 year old is sever ADHD and my 12 yo has just been diagnosed with depression , add, panic disorder and ocd. my daughter is so addaptive and cooperative..
dont ever feel like you are failing.. you are only one person. my husband had to change jobs and we had to make a financial sacrifice so he could be more involved with our children. things are changing.. It helped my 9 yo to have dad more involved ...
email me ..... july13ruby at yahoo dot com 

Name: Lisa.K | Date: Nov 21st, 2005 11:01 AM
I also have a 9 year old adhd boy, I know where you are coming from exactly, I just can't win when I try and be calm and nice he hates me and when I'm angry and yelling he hates me everything i/we try and do is wrong and he'll spoil it. He argues, shouts,screams, bangs up and down the stairs, kicks and punches walls and winds my 2 year old up-god bless you.. 

Name: april | Date: Nov 25th, 2005 9:07 PM
give him the metal belt on the bumb,thats what i do to displine my three children who are out of control[ages:2,4,9] 

Name: SIERRA | Date: Dec 2nd, 2005 12:38 AM
HI 


Name: Nathalie | Date: Dec 12th, 2005 2:31 AM
Hi my name is Nathalie I'm from Canada, just happened to fall onto this site, I'm so glad. You always think your alone living this, but reading all you posts, tells me that no I'm not alone living this. It will be great to exchange with you all.

Thanks ! 

Name: jennifer | Date: Feb 10th, 2006 1:12 AM
I am in the same boat except both of my boys are adhd and add. They literally drive me crazy I am a divorced mom so I have them all the time. My 8 yr old takes adderall 15 mg he does well on that. My 10 yr old was on the same thing, as of monday he was put on concerta 36 mg. He is not doing good on it. He wont eat, looks like a zombie, has no life to him. So i have decided to take him off of it. I can't stand to see him like that. The dr. has said that it takes time to get in his system, just don't know how long. 

Name: Melissa | Date: Mar 27th, 2006 12:56 AM
I have a daugther who is 81/2 and has had adhd for two years that we know of. Everything I do seems to be wrong. I can take toys,spanking,to talking in a nomal voice it dosen't seem to do any good.She fights with my mom all the time. She will go into a rage and get violent sometimes. We live with my mom cause my husbend and I are getting a divorce and I am having a hard time getting someone to watch her,so I can work. If anyone has any infro to help me please let me know. 

Name: GLORIA | Date: Apr 2nd, 2006 9:29 PM
FIRST OF ALL YOU ARE NOT!!!!!!A BAD MOM . MY HUSBAND WORKS NIGHTS AND I HAVE A ADHD SON TOO. HE TAKES CONCERTA BUT BY THE TIME I PICK HIM UP AND GET HIM HOME , BY THE TIME I FIX DINNER, HE IS VERY DEFIANT AND JUST BLOWS OFF WHAT EVER I TELL HIM TO DO. MY 23 YEAR OLD SON TRIES TO HELP BUT HE CANT DO WHAT DAD CAN DO. MY SON IS 12 YEAARS OLD AND ALSO HAS TOURETTES SYNDROME SO HE MAKES ANIMAL NOISES AND IS DESTRUCTIVE. I AM SOMEWHAT DISABLED IN THAT I CANNOT WALK WELL BUT I GET BY. I HAVE FOUND THAT GETTING HIM INVOLVED IN BOY SCOUTS AND WITH A 4-H GROUP HAS BEEN VERY HELPFUL TO ME. A BRIEF EXPLANATION TO THE OTHER KIDS IN AGROUP ALSO HELPS THEM TO UNDERSTAND THAT HE IS NOT JUST BEING A BRAT. THEY TRY TO WORK WITH HIM ALTHOUGH I TRY TO GET THEM NOT TO PUT UP WITH ANY NONSENSE. THIS ALSO IMPROVES HIS CONCENTRATION BECAUSE HE WANTS THE APPROVAL OF HIS FRIENDS IN THAT SETTING. I DO NOT LEAVE HIM ALONE AND I DO STAY AT THE ACTIVITY HOWEVER, I ALWAYS EXPECT HIM TO TRY HISBEST AND BE RESPECTFUL OF THE OTHERS. WE ARE IN AVERY RURAL AREA OF UPSTATE NEW YORK SO THERE ARE LIMITED RESOURSES AVAILABLE . IS YOUR SON IN ANY TYPE OF SPECIAL NEEDS CLASS INSCHOOL? HOW DOES HE DO IN SCHOOL? I HAVE FOUND STRICT STRUCTURE IS HELPFUL BECAUSE THEN HE KNOWS WHAT TO EXPECT. SURPRISES ARE NOT A GOOD THING ESPECIALLY AFTER SCHOOL I TRY TO ALWAYS GIVE HIM INFORMATION ABOUT WHAT TO EXPECT. MORNINGS ARE BAD BECAUSE THE MEDS DONT WORK FAST ENOUGH BUT BY THE TIME HE HAS BREAKFAST HE IS READY FOR SCHOOL . I WISH ICOULD OFFER MORE SUGGESTIONS ,BUT I AM HERE IF YOU WANT TO UNLOAD IT DOES HELP!! 

Name: Alice | Date: Apr 2nd, 2006 11:19 PM
My 7 year old son was diagnosed 3 years ago with Severe Emotional Behavior Disorder and ADHD. He was a nightmare to deal with for everyone that crossed his path. We insisted on an IEP thru the school system so that everything could be documented. In kindergarten he was placed in a special class which is very strict and very structured. We have gone to several psychiatrists and tried several medications. But about 4 months ago we went to a new doctor. She increased his Concerta to 54 mgs and added .5 mgs of Risperdall. And it's like a miracle!!! For the first time my son is getting rave reviews at school and at church! No one can believe this is the same child. His behavior has done a 180. The school is saying that if his behavior stays on track for the remainder of this school year then in the fall he will be mainstreamed!

I just wanted to encourage those of you still dealing with the arguing, non-compliance and fighting to keep trying. In our case the correct dosages & combinations of medications made a world of difference.. 

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