Home » Pick Your Crowd » Divorced Family » Autistic child not sleeping after overnights at dads

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Name: lorelei

[ Original Post ]

I have a 7 year old boy who has been not sleeping for about a week after spending nights at his dads house. I took the nights away and he started sleeping through the nights. His dad got mad about it and now we are in a custody battle. One night every other weekend was givin back to him and now my son is not sleeping again. One week it would be constant back and forth to his room. The second week I would be able to get him to sleep the whole night then it would start all over when he would spend that one night at his dads. I have been to his primary Dr and Psycologis and Psyciatrist and so far the courts don't want to here about how tired he is when he goes to school the temper tantrums from being so tired. Please if anybody has any ideas on how to make things easier for my son from the transition back and forth from both house holds I am all ears. ↓

Name: Lizzi | Date: Oct 17th, 2006 1:52 PM

Is something going on? Like could your son be being molested? Something has got him scared obviously.I watched a movie on an autistic child once who was very agitated and upset at certain times and it was discovered that he was being molested by his daytime caregiver. That's why I ask. If he isn't being molested then maybe he isn't being trested very well by his father or someone who lives with his father.Either way,check into it for your sons sake. ↑

Name: Serina S | Date: Oct 18th, 2006 2:29 AM

cOULD HE JUST BE NOT USE TO THE NEW ROUTINE? ↑

Name: lorelei | Date: Oct 18th, 2006 10:13 AM

I do no beleive he is molested. I do beleive it is routine. The courts done't want to hear about he needs routine. I have gotten dr letters, phycologist reports to varify that it is a routine that he is needing. The father is in deniel that our son has problems. He thinks he can raise him as normal child. He wont give up the night times. I told his father bring him home at night at 9 pm friday and I will take him to his house at 9 am saturday. then do the same time saturday evening and sunday with exception he comes home sunday at 4 to get him ready for school monday. He wont here of it. He would just rather let our son go a week of lack of sleep. It isn't fair to our son when the courts feel he needs to have both parents. I never would take him away from his father. I just think the nights should be taken back. It is non productive time. ↑

Name: Serina S | Date: Oct 22nd, 2006 1:17 AM

Do you think that if he had some personao items at the fathers he migth feel more comfortable? How long has he been doing this routine ... it could just take some time to adjust???
We just moved in to our first house and the kids are with us every weekend.They have things around them that they like and have fun with... ya know so they feel like this is home too. Michael is bipolar and dioes not like changes but it has been a bout a month now and he is thrilled to be here.. Just a thought1 Very best of luck! ↑

Name: pj754 | Date: Oct 22nd, 2006 1:51 AM

Do you know if your child does not sleep at his dad, too? Clearly, spending the night at his dad's house is breaking his routine which is affecting him eternally. Perhaps your psychologist can do some further research or diagnosis as to why he's not sleeping. Obviously, he's not use to the things his father does oppose to you. Does your son speak about the time he does spend with his dad? Does he become more aggressive and out of sorts when he is at his dad? Is he able to talk with a psychologist about being at his dad's. Explain to the psychologist that there are differences in your son's behavior and try to persist that they help you to find out. Perhaps you could have a friend or family member spend the night with you in your home when your son comes back from his dad's in order to observe how your son behaves. Then maybe they can testify on your behalf. Perhaps you can contact Child and Family Services to see if they could send someone out to observe your son one night. How does your son behave when he immediately gets home? Is he irritable? Or if no one is willing to spend the night perhaps you can video tape him secretly to show as evidence. Gosh, I'm sorry this is happing to you and especially him. Poor child has enough to deal with when his routine is broken. See what you can do and keep us posted. ↑

Name: lorelei | Date: Oct 23rd, 2006 12:01 PM

We have tried this for 3 yrs. Back in May I took all overnights away. The Father got mad and took me to court for custody. I was able to get my son to sleep through the night for a whole month during the proceedings of custody. Then I had to give him two nights a month sleep overs and we are back to the up several times a night again. His father says he does get up during the night. (but he says only once) When my son gets home Saturday after a night with his dad. My son wants his bed and will sleep all night (I think due to not sleeping at dads he is exhusted). Then Sunday morning he goes to dads from 9 am to 4 pm. Sunday night I can't get him to go to sleep. He fights it and is cranky. From that point on it is several times a night sending back to his room for about a week. Then it is my weekend and he starts to regulate back to the routine. Then for a week he does good and before you know it. It is dads weekend again. That one Friday night can send my son back to up several times a night for about a week again. I have a dissaplinary specialist that helps both households with routine (I had to have a court order to make his father do this) But thus far It doesn't seem to be working. The father likes to undermine everything that he needs to do for our sons sake. He is still in deniel our son has problems. He thinks we can raise our son like a normal child. He needs to wake up and smell the coffee and realize our son is special. He needs to try to keep some kind of routine for our son before it is to late and our son is out of control. ↑