| Name: N/A | Date: Oct 2nd, 2007 5:54 PM |
Hi James,
My mum has a boyfriend now too. I know exactly what you're going through. For first reasons, is he that bad? Think of all the reasons why you don't like him. Thought of that? Alright, go on the next step. Spend more time with your mates. It'll really take your mind off things and you can relax and have a bit of fun. Also, you've accepted the fact that your dad has a girlfriend, but WHY NOT YOUR MUM? Think through the situation... Have a talk with your mum and tell her all the reasons why you're not comfortable about this and speak rationally and calmly, without any yelling, screaming or physical action. Take turns to speak and try to at least understand each other. Try to understand your mum. She must have been pretty hurt when your dad got himself a girlfriend and moved out, and your mum needs a man to support her. I know what your thinking, it should be you! But you're going to university soon, and not going to be around, and soon you'll move out too! So speak out. TODAY. GOOD LUCK!! ↑ |
| Name: Adam | Date: Oct 3rd, 2007 7:14 PM |
| my mum never talks to me she lov her bf but i get no were i poroper want my mam back ↑ |
| Name: Nicole | Date: Oct 4th, 2007 10:23 AM |
| I understand how you feel.. My Mum has a boyfriend and she met him on a date website. I was really mad because I never accepeted a man in her life ever since my parents divorced when I was just a baby and my sister wasn't even born. I wish I had a say in my Mum and Dad's divorce.. I don't like my Mum's new boyfriend because he has changed my life upside down because they want to move in together and mum's partner knows I completely hate him to bits. I will never be able to talk 2 my mu again coz I won't accept him. Her partner is trying to steal my Mum's family away from my sister and I by giving my grandparents chickens and vegetables.. It is like he is buying my grandparents so they will aceept him. I never know when he comes over because my Mum doesn't warn me which is totally selficious.. I hope they don't get married because I am used to my Mum being single. I once had a fight with her man and I haven't seen him since which is good.. ↑ |
| Name: daisy255 | Date: Oct 26th, 2007 7:03 PM |
| Your mom is being selfish. You have every right to feel the way you do. You can only try to tell her its not appropriate that the bf spends the night and her drinking like that. Find yourself a mentor. Be surrounded by positive people and you will find your way to get through this. ↑ |
| Name: Lou | Date: Oct 29th, 2007 12:29 AM |
| I totally understand where your coming from. My mum has this man friend and I HATE him. I've told my mum. I've shown her all the evidence. If he ever did anything really bad I would get my dad to help us. This man is so wrong. I don't mind my mum having man friends - infact she has had some really lovely man friends but this guy is pure wrong a totally control freak. ↑ |
| Name: saie | Date: Oct 29th, 2007 11:58 PM |
| heyy im trying to get a bf im 14 ↑ |
| Name: Nicky | Date: Nov 25th, 2007 11:05 PM |
| I understand how you feel hun, im 28 and dont live with my mum and i find it hard so it must be tough when its your home and youve got a bloke who is a stranger to you making himself at home! I'm lucky that i dont have to live with him, but whenever im with my mum he is always ringing her and now he is there at family get togethers and she doesnt actually care if we like him or not. I think that is the tough thing because you feel like your banging your head against a brick wall! my mum thought her boyfriend was a prick when she met him and now he has got his feet well under the table. I dont think it would bother me that much if he was an ok guy but he is such a prat! He has no social skills, has a really weird sense of humour and comes out with really weird things all the time, wake up mum, what are you doing! Ive really tried to like him and keep thinking, just give him a chance but every time my opinion on him stands firm. I dont understand why parents dont show a bit more sensitivity and tact because it could make things alot more bareable if they showed a bit of care about how you felt. This man showed no respect for our family home when i was there, when he first came on the scene he used rub my mum's leg in front of us and made himself well at home and I just used to think to myself who the **** do you think you are! Why cant these men\women show a bit of respect for the situation and the children involved!? I think you really need to speak to your mum in a calm way about how you feel about her boyfriend staying over, it is not fair that you should have to listen to them bonking in the next room! Id just say to her " mum, i understand that you want to have company and that your moving on etc. but it doesnt feel like your respecting my feelings or the fact that this is my home too. something like that anyway :-) hang in there hun, it might not last anyway. If your worried that talking to her might cause an argument then you could write her a letter because then you can say exactly what you mean without it getting interrupted by anger or frustration. It is really hard when your mum and dad split and very hard when they start moving on because everything youve known through your life has changed, but your mum is still your mum and i know she still loves you, because im a mum and nothing can change that love. You need to tell her exactly how your feeling and if nothing changes then vote with your feet when you can. But dont let it ruin your relationship with your mum because she will always be your mum and he could be gone in a year or so, well you can hope :-) ↑ |
| Name: Mee | Date: Nov 30th, 2007 5:13 PM |
OMG THAT IS EXACTLY AS MEE
I HATE MY MUMS BOYRFRIEND
YEHH ITS SELFISHH BUTT MY MUM ALWAYS SEDD I CUMM FIRSTT
OKAII YEHH I PROBABLY SOUND LIKE A SELFICH BITCHH
BUT I HATE HIM :@
I KNO MY MUM KNOWS I FEEL THIS BUTTT SHE ALWAYSS GOEESS ONN '' DONTT YOU WONT ME TO BE HAPPY ' NDD I DO I REALLY DOO BUTT :( ↑ |
| Name: lou | Date: Dec 2nd, 2007 5:49 PM |
i have the same situation
i hate it too,
for the same reasons
where are you from in the uk?
xxx ↑ |
| Name: Maggie | Date: Dec 9th, 2007 4:11 AM |
You have to talk to your Mom about how you feel. She cannot read your mnd and she might think that since you've accepted your Dad's GF, you have no problem wth her having a boyfriend. If you don't talk to her, your resentment will grow and it will do permanent damage to your relationship with her - you don't want that.
Timing is everything. Talk to her when she is relaxed, sober and the BF is not there. You might feel more comfortable talking to her outside the home, while you're walking together, etc. Practice what you're going to say if you need to. Tell her about YOU feel, don't blame her for how you feel, for instance, "you make me feel..." Sya "I feel my space is invaded when BF stays over, especially on school nights." You might think of a compromise to offer her - can BF stay over only Friday and Saturday, or if you don't want him to stay over when you're in the house, tell her that. Talk it out and work it out. If Mom doesn't budge, just grin and bear it - nothing lasts forever. Chances are, she will respect how you feel. If not, you have done the manly, mature thing by talking to her. Good luck. ↑ |
| Name: Gwen | Date: Dec 11th, 2007 4:08 AM |
| I feel so sorry for you. I'm in a situation like this too, and I have tried poison once. (it doesn't work for some reason) I hate when people tell me to work it out. I have tried everything! Just know that your not alone. Millions of moms just don't seem to get it! Have you tried putting lipstick on his underwear or women's bras in his car? Let me know if it works. Good luck. ↑ |
| Name: Gwen | Date: Dec 11th, 2007 4:10 AM |
| I feel so sorry for you. I'm in a situation like this too, and I have tried poison once. (it doesn't work for some reason) I hate when people tell me to work it out. I have tried everything! Just know that your not alone. I mean, LOOK at all these posts! Millions of moms just don't seem to get it! Have you tried putting lipstick on his underwear or women's bras in his car? Let me know if it works. Good luck. ↑ |
| Name: celestine | Date: Dec 11th, 2007 5:29 AM |
| Does your mom boyfriend happen to be Julien Henley, Manager at Bernard K. Passman Galleries on 5195 Dronningens Gade Ste. #2 on St. Thomas? If the answer is yes, then both you and your mom run fast. ↑ |
| Name: PamG | Date: Dec 11th, 2007 1:39 PM |
| Hi there, I am really sorry to hear you are having such a bad time, but don't you think your Mom deserves to be happy to and that she is at home with you rather than out and leaving you alone. Accepting your mother with someone else is not easy and as you say, home was the safe place and how you feel as though it has been invaded. I have a daughter who is 12 and hates my new relationship. I was married to a man that was very abusive and unkind and she has choosen to live with him in spite of everything he put us threw. Her reason is that I chose my new boyfriend over her and that is not true. I treasure my daughters and they are my world. The thing is I also need to be happy in life as one day they will move on with their own families and I will be alone and I don't want to grow old alone and I'm sure your Mom feels the same way. Please be patient with her, love her and be there for her you never know when she might just need you for support. Thanks for hearing me out. ↑ |
| Name: donovan williams | Date: Dec 13th, 2007 5:59 AM |
| yea iv got the same problem but my issue is my mom dosent want to stay tied down to one man too long the last time i allow this stupid ass behavior i got a little sister and my life was wreaked and if that happen again i might end up just punching her in the stomach . its like every time he gets close to her i feel the need to defend her and it really pisses me off when they go in her room and close the door .i guess he though the would try to impress me when he got a new car but i already hated him when he walked through the door . its common manners that if your a man when you walk into another mans home you greet him . that goes back to the kings and queens .so ive been trying to get revenge on him without his knowledge (he believes in signs and stuff) so every time he comes over to the house usually around 11 or 12 at night i sneak out and put nails under his truck tires . and if that dosent work i ll start putting stink bombs in his car .but hey james i know how you feel im 16 from the us was the only chid for 11 years and will be damed if theres another child coming ↑ |
| Name: Me | Date: Dec 25th, 2007 11:12 AM |
| i know exactly how you feel! i just come home from my dads to find out that my mums boyfriend is gonna be at my house later onb today and itsxmas for god sake! i told my mum i dont want him to be here and she had a go at me and said she hated me and now i've ruined xmas for everyone and i have to go to my dads! all i wanted to do was be happy and have a good xmas but i cant even have that now ↑ |
| Name: zeena | Date: Jan 15th, 2008 12:43 PM |
| thats bad but i have a really annoying older brother and my mum takes his side but there are people worse off then you i mean my dad is married with a son and another baby girl on the way my mum still stays single but she does everything for my brother. my brother has destroyed my life and plus when your 16 you can leave home thats what im doing i cant stand the house i live it so just wait a while and things should get better :) ↑ |
| Name: Bin Thru It All | Date: Jan 16th, 2008 7:48 PM |
Omg ! Well i totally no how u feel . me , mu mum n lil bro have just moved in wiv mii mums boyfriend n his 2 kids , he bosses me around all the tym n yeahh he's an ok guy but my mum ghas 2 run around and change my arrangements 2 take his kids 2 skl or summat . yeah he takes us 2 skl but he doesnt make his kids change anything . it really pisses me off though. but what you have to deal with is that shes happy and if she's happuer with him than without then maybe you should accept that .
JUst Speak to her x ↑ |
| Name: Bethany | Date: Jan 17th, 2008 7:42 PM |
| i love my mum you can't love or care for your mum so thats how she will treat you the same ↑ |
| Name: fanny girl | Date: Jan 27th, 2008 9:30 PM |
| everyone that has sent a message here are all fannys, even me . IM FANNY GIRL ↑ |
| Name: Isabel | Date: Jan 31st, 2008 11:09 PM |
| Hey thats really sad! Im sorry but you need to calm down if you are 17 you can move out in one year then you never have to deal with your mom and her ass boyfriend. You should talk to your mom tell her whats up and just talk to her not her boyfriend. Then you can get married and have kids with who you choose GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ↑ |
| Name: Ryan | Date: Feb 11th, 2008 12:04 AM |
| Yeah dude just ask ur dad to pick u up when ur mom and her boyfriend are away. Then ask him if u could live with him. But if u do that ask ur mom if she really likes the guy. She might think he's cute even though he may be but ugly. ↑ |
| Name: Jessica | Date: Feb 12th, 2008 8:03 AM |
| hey i know what you feel like my mum has a boyfriend to and i know it pisses me off to but im still not over it i try to just forget about him and stuff and no matter what ur mum loves you 1,000000000000000000000000000 times and even more ↑ |
| Name: ebony rose | Date: Feb 27th, 2008 4:27 PM |
| i hate my mum shehates meannd ihate herbut u just got to leve them alone ↑ |
| Name: alexendra | Date: Mar 3rd, 2008 9:01 AM |
| just informed the boyfriend to go away and you can informed a priest to advice your mother you can contact me via [email protected] ↑ |
| Name: me | Date: Sep 28th, 2008 6:42 PM |
hey dude i no my mums new boyfriend keep getting in my face and say how i horrible and he makes me feel worthless my mum takes his side all the time ive think the best thing is to ignore him and walk away he just doing it to wind you up
if he makes your mum happy then mabey she worth it ↑ |
| Name: ann | Date: Sep 29th, 2008 4:50 PM |
| Are you sure youu are not HOPING that if your mom does not date that your parents might get back together which is PERFECTLY NORMAL! Your mom is entitled to date, and she should be very careful who she chooses. Your mom is a grown woman and when your dad chose someone else it left the door open for your mom to start over. Just because she has someone else in her life does not mean you are not first. Also keep in mind you are 17 and you will be going to college soon...do you really want your mom alone? Talk to her...don't be little her...let her know how much you love her....if there is some thing about the guy that worrys you maybe she needs to know that but be RESPECTFUL. good luck ↑ |
| Name: marth | Date: Sep 29th, 2008 4:53 PM |
I hate my mum and her boyfriend I feel like caling the police!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!
and I DONT BLAME ANYONE ELSE ↑ |
| Name: Lizzie | Date: Oct 11th, 2008 6:08 PM |
| hiya. i no u r pissed n all dat but relax give ur mum a break. shed wants to ave a bit of fun in the house. u should go out with ur friendds and do crazzy stuff. if the sex contines like every night then talk to both of them. n if dat dont work out then leave when ur 18 simple as ↑ |
| Name: sarah | Date: Oct 21st, 2008 3:33 PM |
| Name: ben | Date: Nov 17th, 2008 9:08 PM |
| im in the same sittuation i hate my mums boyfriend soo much hes a dick. my mum had a boyfriend 2 years ago and he cheated and lied so i dont trust him she wont listen to me she always says ill put you first but she does not listen to me!!!!!! ↑ |
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