| Name: bonnie | Date: Sep 4th, 2010 2:25 AM |
| i'm getting married the money and after 6 month, how should i go about getting a divorce? ↑ |
| Name: Yali | Date: Sep 11th, 2010 10:39 AM |
| I am going through the same thing after 15 years of marriage and 4 children. My husband has said all the above, is always on the phone, i checked his computer the other day and the cookies and all were gone, he took a trip away and I only found out because I happend to see a ticket in his shirt, looked up and he was gone for a week. He is extremely distant, angry and mean...can i get view point... ↑ |
| Name: JazzyLily | Date: Sep 11th, 2010 6:16 PM |
| My husband of 36 yrs. has Early-Onset Parkinsons's Disease ( 17 yrs.) Dibetes type 2, Macular Degeneration and Fibromyalgia. He told me two days ago that he doesn't love me or like me.. He told me in July that he hates me.... I have no money and no where to go.... ↑ |
| Name: silvia | Date: Sep 12th, 2010 2:17 AM |
| hi would chat about my husband ↑ |
| Name: LUCKY IN 1 WAY | Date: Sep 23rd, 2010 1:35 AM |
| HI I KNOW WHAT YOUR GOING THROUGH 2 YEARS AGO I WAS MARRIED FOR ONLY 3 MONTHS I KNOW VERY SHORT TIME BUT I LOVED HIM MORE THEN ANYTHING AND AFTER 3 MONTHS HIS MOM DAD FAMILY FRIENDS CHANGED HIM I CANT EXPLAIN BUT HIS MOM WOULD ARGUE WITH ME AND I WOULDN'T SAY A THING LIKE A CAT HAS TAKEN MY TONG I TRIED TO MAKE HIM SEE I WAS GOOD AND I NEVER STARTED ANYTHING BUT HE KNEW IT ALREADY AND HE WAS ALWAYS STICKING UP FOR ME AND GETTING INTO ARGUMENTS WITH HIS MOM OH BY THE WAY IM YOUNG 19 AT THE TIME IM 21 NOW AND WE WAS A YOUNGER COUPLE BUT IN LOVE FOR WHAT HE TOLD ME SO 3 MONTHS LATER HE CHANGED THEY CHANGED HIM AND HE AND I SPLIT HE LEFT ME THEN HE GOT MARRIED IN LESS THEN A MONTH WE WAS NOT EVEN DIVORCED YET AND HE GOT MARRIED I WAS PREGNANT TO I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT I WAS 2 MONTHS PREGNANT AND HE STILL LEFT ME GOT MARRIED AND I WAS 2 MONTHS AND CRYING LIKE A BABY I WAS NOT EVEN EMOTIONAL AS IT WAS BEING PREGNANT SO LONG STORY SHORT IT WAS OVER HE DIDN'T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH ARE BABY HE WAS SOOOOOOO CRAZY SO WHEN I BECAME 6 MONTHS PREGNANT HE WANTED ME BACK AND I SAID NO WAY HE LEFT THAT GIRL AND SAID IM SORRY HE TALKED TO MY MOM AND I WOULDN'T TALK TO HIM HE HURT ME TO BAD I WAS HAVING HIS BABY AND IN LOVE WITH HIM AND HE LEFT ME FOR ANOTHER WOMEN AND BECAUSE OF HIS PARENTS TOLD HIM TO AT THE END HE WANTED ME I DIDN'T WANT TO EVER SPEAK TO HIM AGAIN BUT I WAS DIEING INSIDE BECAUSE I LOVED HIM MORE THEN ANYTHING AND I STILL LOVE HIM AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO I CANT TAKE HIS LOVE HIS FACE ARE LITTLE MEMORIES WE HAD AWAY I JUST CANT GET OVER IT TODAY IT IS SEPTEMBER 22TH 2010 AND MY BABY GIRL IS 14 MONTHS OLD HER NAME IS PARIS AND I LOVE HER MORE THEN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD AND WHEN I LOOK AT HE I THINK WHY GOD THIS HAD TO HAPPEN TO ME AND PARIS WHY TAKE HER DAD AWAY FROM HER WHY IT WOULDN'T BE THE WAY OTHER PEOPLE ARE WITH THERE KIDS FAMILY I JUST CRY A LOT AND IM SO YOUNG AND I DON'T WANT TO GO LOOKING FOR A GUY BECAUSE I FELL LIKE MY LIFE IS OVER THE ONLY THING I HAVE TO LIVE FOR IS MY BABY GIRL WITH OUT HER IN THIS WHOLE SITUATION I THINK I WOULD A DIE I THANK GOD FOR HER BUT I STILL AM VERY CONFUSED I NEED ADVICE ON WHAT TO DO ABOUT MY HURTING OR JUST SOME ONE TO TALK TO BECAUSE ALL MY FAMILY MY PARENTS SISTERS BROTHERS THINK IM FINE AND IM STRONG AND I GOT OVER IT WHEN I WAS PREGNANT BECAUSE I PRETENDED I DID GET OVER IT I LIED BECAUSE I WAS ASHAMED OF WHAT HAPPEN TO ME AND I WANTED IT TO LOOK LIKE I DIDN'T CARE AND IM STRONG AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE IT WAS A BIG MISTAKE THAT I WAS OKAY WITH BUT I LIED AND I HIDE IT INSIDE SINCE OVER 2 YEARS NOW AND I GUESS I JUST NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO SO PLEASE. ↑ |
| Name: Stacy | Date: Oct 1st, 2010 4:51 PM |
| have been married 14 yrs. we have ↑ |
| Name: Stacy | Date: Oct 1st, 2010 5:02 PM |
| hi. Ive been married for 14 yrs. we have 4 beautiful children and one on the way(due on christmas day) my husband within the last 7 or 8 months has told me he no longer wants to be married,that he still cares for me but dosint love me and is not happy. i have found out he had a bank account(i knew nothing about) i see a difference in his appearance for work(he works construction) his phone os off limits to me. he says this is because i got into his phone before and called some #'s, and i crossed the line.he is home every night, does not drink, but is so distant. hes started sleeping on the sofa and his only excuse is he dosint want to argue. hes been calling me names in front of our children, and has ask me to move out. he says he will mk sure the rent is pd and i or the kids have nothing to worry about. i do not have a job nor do i drive,but he wants me to uproot our children and move on because he comfortable here. i have asked him if there is someone else and he says no, absolutley not. he just wants to be alone. i also found evidence of a msg sent online quote"i am very interested in you and would like to hear more from you" he says this was written out for a friend (a single friend),because the friends english isint very good and the friend wanted to mk sure the spelling wascorrect. please someone any advise would be greatly appreciated!! i feel so lost and alone!! ↑ |
| Name: linda | Date: Oct 5th, 2010 4:25 PM |
| my husband told me he wanted a divorce . ↑ |
| Name: Ric | Date: Oct 10th, 2010 12:37 AM |
Wow - you ladies need to learn about birth control and stop living in the 1950's. The world is very different. economy is unstable - people want more freedom, etc...
Condoms are easier to change than diapers.... ↑ |
| Name: vdo | Date: Oct 23rd, 2010 10:51 PM |
| I'M MARRIED FOR 4YEARS the last 3 months we were having big problems because we couldnt comunicate well . iwas very selfish and i push him away . i didnt wanna participate in his sports activities only mine .the places i wanned to go and i relized my problem . but was late cuz he told me the he nned so time apart and see if this can work . im doing everything i can every day to change and trying to show him the i"m . he is staying with his friend already a week .this hurt me alot and i relized what i have to change. i saw him today he was more calm but im afraid he wont want it come back home . i was calm whem i talked to him i accept my mistakes and he listen didnt say anything. he is more calm and relax and i was thinking to tell him to pass by to our apartment next weekend to have some dinner at home and just talk for a little ? but i"m not sure is the right moment or i should wait until he is ready to talk to me ↑ |
| Name: kelly | Date: Nov 9th, 2010 12:08 AM |
Hello
I need a wife to be with. all my contact is in the last page............
Now, I know we have not gotten to really know each other all that long and there is a little bit of an age difference between us, but I do really like you. You are a very special man.
There is so much about you I see that I know most girls don't see. They are all looking at you for your body. But Honey, I am telling you, that is not what I am doing. There is so much more to you than that.
I have liked you for a very long time now but just never had the guts to say it to you. Well, that has all changed now. I am going all out and I am going to say it all. I really care a lot about you, and I would like to be a lot more then just friends. You mean so much to me.
I mean, just seeing your cute little smile when I am having a bad day just makes the day seem not too dim. Or just to have you give me a hug makes me all warm and tingly inside.
Just to see your smiling face brightens my darkest day. So, Kelvin, what do you say, would you like to give it a go??????????????
Love Always,
Kelly +2348052866322
[email protected],
[email protected] ↑ |
| Name: A. Guy's Perspective | Date: Nov 9th, 2010 12:40 PM |
| Hello everyone. I would like to give you a male perspective on this if I may, please. I have just turned 40. We have a 4-year old and a two-and-a-half year old. I am a professional and we have a really good lifestyle. I now find that I have sacrificed so much of myself , that I am not sure whether there is anything left of myself for ME. EVERYONE - from the wife; the kids; the boss; the family - have had their slice of my ass. When do I get to have my happiness? You may say "welcome to reality, surely you knew what to expect?". Yes, true, but when I got married at age 32, I didn't expect the saacrifices to be SO BIG. And I have grown weary of this whole marriage and kids status quo. Guess what: I no longer want to be a marketing director! I want to be a scuba instructor or archaeologist or life coach. I no longer want to pay for the fancy BMW. I want a soft-top Jeep. I no longer want the complications. I want to learn to paint; to learn to sing and play music. I am not sure that I actually want another woman at all in the near future, if I had to leave my wife. I just want the blissful, peaceful silence in a place that would be my own - even if it were a one bedroomed apartment - and the freedom to do what I feel I need to. I feel that I am no longer "into" the wife and kids thing. I would naturally, continue to support the wife and kids in terms of monthly payments, but you know what? I am just SO SICK of the whole marriage and children deal. I so WISH I could escape. Had I known then, what I know now about this whole "get married and have kids, its so rewarding" propaganda, I would NEVER had got into it. Before you criticize, let me assure you that I would always ensure that my family were provided for if I were to ever leave. No need to take me to court to ensure that I would do my manly duty - I would do it happily and voluntarily. Why do I feel this way? I don't know. I wish I knew why the joy has gradually been sucked out of life over the last decade since I have been married. And no, its not immaturity. It was something that happened very slowly. I cannot pinpoint it exactly, but the net result as of today is a joyless life. I also feel NO NEED to chase young women nor to buy a red sports car. (besides, the current one is grey - LOL) *sigh* What to do guys? I am not a bast*rd by nature, seriously. Please do not slam me for what i cannot help but feeling. ↑ |
| Name: dlovely | Date: Nov 14th, 2010 9:03 PM |
| I know how you feel I am going through a marraige with a man that does not know how to love and has not showed me any change whatsoever.I have been through abuse adultery and I am not even appreciated up until this day.At least your husband had the balls to tell you that he wasnt happy because mines is a coward that has baxically proved to me that he doesnt want to be married or have a family.We have four children that he pays no attention to at all other than yelling at them.so take it for what it is and just do you. ↑ |
| Name: KANDI | Date: Nov 16th, 2010 11:49 PM |
| Name: anotherGuy POV | Date: Nov 19th, 2010 11:36 PM |
@A. Guy's Perspective: I so know what you mean. I AM EXACTLY IN THE SAME PLACE except I really enjoy being a Dad and if weren't for my kids I would've pull the trigger some time ago. At this point my wife and I are in therapy trying to work through it but I don't think the issue is her, I'm pretty sure it's me. I've also reached a point where I no longer believe marriage is for everyone. Unfortunately though the only way to find that out is to go do it. Anyway I wish you the best as for me all I can do is fantasize about being on my own, I feel guilty about feeling this way but I know I cannot control my feelings just my actions. Trying to find out if there's anyway to balance my feelings but I don't think so. This really sux as I don't want to hurt my wife but I also don't want to live life feeling basically unfulfilled.
Rock meet hard place. (*sigh*) ↑ |
| Name: sputter | Date: Nov 20th, 2010 4:29 AM |
| Married 30 yrs. He says he loves me but I don't remember the last time he touched me. He doesn't even kiss me. We live like room mates. Yes we share a bed but nothing happens there I feel like a sludge and the longer it goes on the more I lose energy and I eat. So I gain weight which isn't attractive and I don't care what I look like 'cause he doesn't care and so I am in a spiral. You know it would be easier if I just passed on....no messiness. ↑ |
| Name: helen | Date: Nov 25th, 2010 10:45 AM |
| My husband says he doesnt love me and he cant live with me in the same house anymore. we have 3 beautiful adolescent children and our finances are better than they have ever been. He has built up resentment from the aggressiveness I have demonstrated during our arguments and he also says that with time he has come to like /love another woman with whom he used to work with. He says he wants to move forward and is very hostile towards me when I try to convince him to give it another go and give me time to make changes. He says he finds me very sexually attractive and he has not stopped having sex with me. Even when we have had heated arguments he will have passionate sex with me. He says he cares deeply for me and the children and will move out and contribute money to all the bills / mortgage etc... so that I can stay in our house with our kids. I am soooo hurt and it feels that nothing I can do or say will change his mind. Does it sound like I can actually make him change his mind or should I just get on with it and let go???? ↑ |
| Name: Jerry Dingman | Date: Dec 3rd, 2010 1:05 PM |
| Name: j | Date: Dec 5th, 2010 8:51 PM |
| Most men are the same, sex is great but oops. Who want s a baby x ↑ |
| Name: carolann | Date: Dec 27th, 2010 4:24 PM |
| my husband left me with 3 kids today ↑ |
| Name: sue | Date: Dec 28th, 2010 2:21 PM |
| I told my husband I would leave him today after 25 years of what I thought was happy marriage. i`ve stuck it out now the crap bit for 3 years shall I leave or!! any advice? ↑ |
| Name: shanti | Date: Jan 1st, 2011 6:55 PM |
Hi all....reading about everyone's misfortune made me wanna share mine..
My husband and i were married for 5 years, and together for 6...we kinda rushed into a wedding cuz we were in love and if we didnt he would have had to leave the country. but as soon as we moved in together, it got mad - fights and insults- he wanted to control everything in my life. And since we were a "mixed" couple (he's tunisian, im belgian), my family didnt really accept him and we were very isolated...but we kept our heads high and after a 2 month break we got back together but each in our own apartment...it went on like that for a few years...because i was afraid of the violence and the insults and the control ...but my love for him made me hold on...
He changed a lot for me...was always there when i needed him...would come see me almost everyday though he was tired from work..but since he got serious in his job..he's another man..sad, angry, lonely...we never went on holidays together except in his family...he works 6 days a week all the time and is exhausted...beginning of july we moved back together again...but i felt terrible because he wouldnt wanna do anything, and everytime i went to him i felt i would just be a bore...so i told him iwas unhappy and that we didnt have much in common anymore, that i didnt interest him anymore....it was a shock for him but he agreed with me!...and soon i was the one begging for him to stay but he says he feels so bad he just wants to be alone , that he doesnt want any of my help, that we must divorce quick, that our marriage didnt satisfy him...the worst part is that he is not mean..he says i tought him so much and that he still has desire for me, he wants to cuddle with me and be "friends"..but he says too that the love has changed and that we have no future together....i fought so hard for this to work..trying to overcome the cultural differences..but i failed..i cant even help him. I love him but i dont want to force him ...if thats what he wants ill set him free.. If anyone has an opinion on this,or similar experience it is welcomed...but just spitting it out at least stopped the tears a little...and when i see what others have been through, with kids or hate feelings..i tell myself its not so bad but i feel really worthless for not having been able to prevent it ...maybe if i hadnt said anything..things would have gotten better...that haunts me... ↑ |
| Name: scs | Date: Jan 6th, 2011 8:54 AM |
| hi i am married having one kid 2 year old i married at 25 had worst life with my husband first when married i dont know he is drunker when he was coming for me and going of not again returning back I tought he might be busy but because of dowry land and he did not cam back after lot of discussion he came to me and when I cam to know that he is drunker I though little away it will go but it become more and more day to day passes i got angry called there parents they also become negitive on me they strated saying that they were correct and iam wrong as his child will never drink because of me only he strated drinking. I got very much angry and left the place saying If you child is good there is no need to speak to you. After some days he aproched me saying that he was wrong and apolized me for all what happend but i thought he will be good for me but thing we worest again he started torchuring me with his acts and drinking heavely and making me not to go any where I faced a lot want to hang my self tried to do so. I though of moving away from him and thougt of giving divorce but my parents did not agree with me because they have not seen with there eye's after that we have changed our house and then i have thoght that we may have a good life but there also started bad life i was pregnent things went more wrong and he strated drinking more and more and i left him form almost 1 year he become sick admited in hospetal still there was no change but when I gave birth to boy still it become worst there is no other way then to think of him to move to rehabitation center i did so after 2 month we got him back still he started the same there is no hope and never ending of this story but my life become worest and feel like killing him and get rid of him give solution to the same. ↑ |
| Name: virginia | Date: Feb 9th, 2011 9:28 AM |
| me an my husband been togther for 5 years and have a 2 year old my husband told me he dont feel the same way about me no more thats he been talkin to different girls ↑ |
| Name: PunchJudy | Date: Feb 23rd, 2011 9:44 AM |
Love hurts in such an unimaginable way that when it does hurt you it changes you at a cellular level.
I’ve read every post since the start and I’m so sad to say I’m in the same boat. Like you I didn’t see it coming.
My husband sounds exactly like the post by: A. Guy's Perspective | Date: Nov 9th, 2010 7:40 AM (bar the kids) it’s making me sick reading that but I can’t help read it again and just sadly nod. I have the same pressures mentioned in that post but on-top of that I did all the grocery shopping, all the laundry, all the cooking, and all housework and as much as I wanted to leave it all behind, move to the country and open a cake shop I still stuck by my husband, because that is married life, it’s a partnership and a friendship that’s supposed to be everlasting – or so I thought. Anyway after having my heartbroken again when another friend confined in me she is pregnant (I have ALWAYS wanted kids for years now) and I had to spend the whole day happy on the outside but breaking on the inside, I confronted my husband – like you it turns out he ‘likes’ me and says he ‘loves’ me but he hasn’t ‘loved’ me for a few years now, hasn’t thought we were working for a few years now and in fact I found out he is in the process of looking for a new apartment – when he was going to tell me it’s over still boggles my mind since I knew we weren’t on the same page but never knew he wanted this “freedom” (like A. Guy's Perspective described to a T) so badly he was going to turn his back on me after 9yrs without 1) speaking to me and 2) wanting to find help to make it work – I told him from the start of us getting serious I’m a girl who didn’t want to get married for marriage sake, I wanted a life partner who knew there was hard times and was willing to make it work because love and companionship was worth that effort (*shakes head at my naïve romantic outlook of life*)
I’ve just turned 30 and I feel like I have wasted my life, wasted my 20s – wasted all that energy being a doormat and wasted all that effort over working towards “our” needs when in reality I should have just concentrated on me like he only thought of himself (she says in a sarcastic voice… sorry still a little raw.)
Anyway I’m trying to relocating and start fresh. If you want a chirpy, positive person^ who shares your pain hit me up [email protected]
^ Disclaimer: will most likely be a little saw and negative for the first few weeks as this just happened but by nature that’s not me. ↑ |
| Name: PunchJudy | Date: Feb 23rd, 2011 9:52 AM |
| crud... double post makes me sad xD ↑ |
| Name: AskSadie | Date: Apr 11th, 2011 8:27 PM |
| Make sure you haven't let yourself go in terms of atrractiveness. I know when I was having children, the fanciest thing I wore were my husband's robe and a schmata on my head. I wore no makeup (who's got time for that) didn't shave my legs or armpits and was asleep when he got home with no dinner on the table. Remember that a lot of men , not all, but most are immature and seek attention form their significant other inspite of the needs of the children. Also, was this said out of anger? After an arguement? Or did he mention it to you calmly? There's a difference. ↑ |
| Name: Amoritas23 | Date: May 11th, 2011 6:48 AM |
| My husband and I are exhausted with the emotional abuse we both feel. I didn't want him to leave but he's told me there is nothing I can do, and I've come to realize that change is the only option. If that means letting him go then I'm now willing to accept a life ahead without him. A new life just might be the best thing that ever happened to me. After 2 years of marriage and 4 years of being together, letting him go will be the best thing to do if I really love him. I deserve to be happy and so does he. ↑ |
| Name: Athena | Date: May 11th, 2011 2:03 PM |
| I thought my husband and I were blissfully in love, I bragged to my friends about how he always did romantic things and helped me around the house. Our son is deaf and last week he had to have an operation. My husband refused to stay with me in hospital after our son got out of surgery. When I took our 16 month old son home I asked him to explain why he wouldn't stay. He said I treated him like dirt and he couldn't cope with our son any more. He says he is thinking of leaving us even though he says he still loves me. I didn't see this coming at all. I feel like I got hit by a train. He is still living with me and we are sharing a bed and having sex but he still keeps saying he thinks he might want to leave. He has taken to going out with his friends every night to 'unwind' from the stresses of his life. What about me? I can't stop crying. How could he do this to me and our son? ↑ |
| Name: J-girl | Date: Jun 25th, 2011 9:50 PM |
| Gosh, this is epidemic! I found out that my husband has been keeping a separate singles facebook page, listing himself as single and interested in women. He has been messing around with other women behind my back (not sleeping, I don't think), and now he says he's not sure he wants to be married but needs to flirt with many other women to feel happy and 'himself.' But then he does not want a divorce. He's so messed up, that he does not know what he wants. And he's never put 'us' first, but now we have so many people living in our home because he invited them in, regardless of what I want. So, I'm moving out. Bottom line - if your husband lies and cheats on you, and that includes his saying he wants to be married when he doesn't and then using this as an excuse to cheat, or telling you that he feels stifled in the relationship and then cheating on you, and then telling you it's your fault (like mine did) then it's best to move out and get on with your life. You'll never be happy with a person like that, who does not know what he wants or who he is. Mine is 60 years old, and still he says he cannot be happy with just one woman, but needs many, and blames this on his ADD. I still love him in the 'abstract' but I've lost my respect for him, too, for what he did, and without respect there cannot be real love. Good luck, and many blessings to you. ↑ |
| Name: Anonymous | Date: Jul 8th, 2011 3:30 PM |
| Oh my Goodness, it quite shocking how many women out there that have gone through or have been through the same thing that I am going through right now. My husband is in the Foreign Service and after 7 years of being overseas...doing this and that and trying to be the perfect wife and mom, after 9 years of marriage, 2 kids, my soul mate and my everything, tells me he doesn't want to be married anymore then a year later, I finds out that he is having an affair then he promised that it was over and we will try but mean time, he carried on with the affair and I find out on FB....with the whole world knowing my business....so now , I am at lost. As hard as it is, I feel that we should part ways but I want to hear from him whether this is truly what he wants...I am so scared of the future. ↑ |
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